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fictionalsweethearts · 6 months ago

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THE COMMISSION - EPILOGUE | SEVIKA X READER | ARCANE

'The Commission' series: pt. 1, pt. 2, pt. 3, pt. 4, epilogue.

Synopsis: You've been her personal mechanic for two years, but your growing reputation in the field has earned you dozens of clients and commissions. Sevika was looking for something fresh, durable and of good quality, and when it came to her sexual appetite, she only accepted the best. So she turned to you for a special commission.

Contains: arcane!sevika, feminine reader, lesbians, lots of dialogues, arcane universe, cannon sevika, mechanic!reader, wlw, slow burn BURNING

If you're underage, be responsible and don't consume smut content. GO AWAY AND BUILD A MOTHERFUCKING SAND CASTLE, THANK YOU.

Word count: 5,217 (yeah, things ALSO happen in this chapter)

Note: English is not my first language, so I apologize in advance for any mistake in my writing. Enjoy!

Sevika has always been a woman who foresees situations, analyzes people, studies patterns, assumes decisions, all as a mechanism of defense to the unpredictable of her childhood and the constant reproaches of her father for not having "been ahead of the facts." However, and as much as she thought she knew everything about you, Sevika never thought she would end the year with her lying in her bed, watching you fix her mechanical arm in with only your panties on after an entire afternoon of naps and cuddles.

The room smelled of tobacco and candle oil, which formed warm shadows on the wall while Zaun's nocturnal murmur sneaked through the window, giving a cozy and certainly sensual touch to the room. Sevika found a shelter between the sheets of her bed and between your legs, on your vast chest and your fingers interlaced on her hair. As soon as she set foot at home, she allowed herself to detach herself from the impenetrable facade and stop pretending that the whole world depended on her, because soon enough she would look for you in the living room and strip off of her cape and surround you with her arms and nuzzle in your neck.

"Bad day?"

"Shitty." She would mumble. "Silco's testing my patience again."

"What do you need?"

"Silence..." she said. "And a hot bath."

"I'll get it ready." you whispered, knowing Sevika would pull you back if you dared to leave her arms right now.

She tightened her grip around you, letting out a grunt. "Not yet." She whispered.

"You always keep up with too much, Sev." You said, pulling back just enough to catch a glimpse of her gloomy expression.

"Someone has to," she muttered, her voice muffled. "The idiots down in the fissures would be lost without me."

"You have to stop taking responsibility for everybody's mistakes." You insisted. "It's burning you out."

"It's my position."

"Then your position is unfair." You insisted, letting out a sigh. "Alright, enough. You're at home now."

No business talk at home. It was a rule you'd set up early on, an agreement that when she was with you, she needed to let go of the stress and responsibilities of her role in order to not disturb the only place she felt safe in.

"...fine."

"Good." You said, placing a kiss on her cheek. "Long day, you need to unwind a bit." You added, before Sevika pulled you for a well deserved kiss.

You closed your eyes, tasting the kiss as your hands ran over her vast back, the leather of her vest and the metal of her left arm, daring to disable Shimmer's passage with a small button you placed at shoulder height.

"What are you…?

"You don't need to use it at home." you whispered.

She wanted to protest, but soon her expression softened, the tension in her muscles lessening. "No business at home," she repeated your earlier words. "And no Shimmer."

"You remembered." you smiled, leaning to kiss her again as Sevika trapped your waist with her flesh arm. Slowly her kiss intensified, shedding the stress of the day and focusing on what you had to offer her. Then, you began to push her towards the desk until the back of her thighs met the edge and you settled between her legs.

"I've never seen you like this..." she whispered, her voice filled with a note of awe. "What's gotten into you, pretty girl?"

Her grip on the desk tightened as your hands caressed her thighs, feeling the warmth of her skin through the fabric of her trousers. You leaned down to pepper kisses along her neck and jaw, your hand moving down her chest and squeezing one of her breasts between your fingers. "I'm doing my job."

It didn't take you more than ten seconds to make it clear to her that you weren't playing around. You had already unbuttoned her vest, one hand firmly on her tit as you kissed her mouth and pushed yourself between her legs. Only then, and with some impatience, you stepped back to begin unbuckling her belt.

"Baby-"

"Shh... It'll feel good, I promise." you whispered against her lips, which Sevika grunted.

Sevika frowned, studying this unexpectedly direct and assertive side of you. The first few times you slept together, you allowed Sevika to take control, knowing she was far more experienced in bed than you, allowing yourself to be explored and tasted as much as she wanted. But tonight Sevika deserved to be the one explored and you were willing to use as many tricks as she had been able to teach you in those endless nights on bed and quickies in the kitchen.

Sevika caressed the back of your neck, lifting her hips as you slid her pants and underwear off, letting you take over. Her heart was pounding in her throat, watching you kneel before her and place kisses on the inside of her thighs.

"Uh, fuck." she breathed out when you dive into her pussy with a long and gentle lap. Her head fell back, her flesh hand burying on your hair as she couldn't control such natural reaction.

Sevika liked giving better, rather than receiving. She loved the idea of giving someone else those thrills of pleasure, of hearing them moan and sigh, their legs closing around her head in search of more contact. But being the one on the receiving end felt a world of difference.

Her legs on your shoulders, you were dipping into the wetness of her pussy as you kissed and licked her folds, sucking her clit softly, just to glance at her briefly from time to time. You could see her abdomen tightening, her chest rising with each breath, and the chiseled line of her neck and jaw. You moaned, not just from feeling in control, but from finally allowing yourself to explore her. She tasted so good. Her wetness smearing your chin, the curls of her pubic hair against your nose, her musky smell filling your nostrils and making you hiss.

She was the whole damn meal.

Sevika growled, gripping the edge of the desk with her flesh hand, her fingers clenching and loosening in time with each lap and kiss. You were shamelessly slurping, sucking and kissing, and if you had just bit more of boldness, you would've spit on it just to piss her off.

"Yeah, good..." she growled, looking down at you. "Feast on it, pretty girl."

Her legs trembled, you caught a hint of a whimper coming out her mouth as you dug just a bit more into her pussy, gripping her thights apart. You didn't realize she came, an orgasm almost imperceptible until a guttural moan escaped her throat and she suddenly pulled your hair and brought you for a kiss.

"You're getting too bold." she said in a ragged whisper.

Your breath trembled, your act of daring ended as soon as Sevika claimed her position back with that phrase. Then she sighed, cupping your cheek.

"You..." she whispered, her voice hoarse. "You never cease to surprise me." She leaned in, planting a soft kiss on your forehead. "You did good, pretty girl. Really good."

The taste of recognition filled your mouth and made your stomach flutter. Nothing tasted as good as Sevika's praises. Absolutely nothing. "You said something about a bath...?" she asked then, as you stepped back.

"Yeah, yeah." You nodded. "I'll get it ready right away."

Sevika leaned back against the desk, her breath still coming in soft pants as she watched you move away. Her body was boneless, relaxed from the release you had given her, and there was a hint of a smile on her lips. Just when you left the room, she admitted how damn weak she ended up. Her legs were fucking limp.

"This goddamn girl." She muttered.

"How did this happen?" you asked, focused on the mechanical arm's malfunctions. "The joints are broken, the shimmer compartment burnt. Did you get into a fight with a damn lion or what?"

Sevika sighed, tucking an arm under her head as she watched you fix the piece from the bed. For the past ten minutes she was unable to think of anything other than your slim back and the softness of your ass. Repairing her arm half naked was quite the way to end the day.

"A fight with a lion would have been less troublesome," she finally replied, her voice a bit strained.

"So...?"

Sevika shifted, propping herself up on her elbow to watch you work. "So," she began, a bit reluctantly. "There was a bit of a disagreement with Jinx."

She grimaced, remembering the encounter. "She rigged one of her bombs to explode when I wasn't looking. Caught me by surprise, blew up my goddamn arm."

You suddenly threw down your tools, turning around with anger showing on your face. "She what?" you spat.

"Easy, easy." she said, her voice gentle yet firm. She held up her flesh arm, as if trying to placate you. "It's not as bad as it sounds. I've had my arm blown off before, remember?"

"She could've killed you!" you barked.

"I'm tougher than I look," she said, a hint of a smile on her lips. "And I doubt Jinx was actively trying to kill me. She just enjoys causing chaos."

"I don't give a damn if she's into causing chaos and shit, she'll end up killing someone." you stated, standing up. "What caused her a fit of madness this time? Silco didn't comply to one of her stupid whims?"

She groaned. "It's Jinx," she said, as if that explained everything. "The little gremlin's always been unpredictable. And Silco... Well, he's learned not to get in her way when she's in the middle of one of her episodes."

She leaned back. "I can handle her, baby, don't sweat it."

"She's a goddamn lose cannon." you hissed. "And you're fine with it? Don't be stupid."

Sevika's expression darkened at your harsh words. "I'm not stupid." she snapped, her own temper flaring momentarily. "And I have my reasons for tolerating Jinx's antics."

She took a deep breath, trying to remain calm. "The undercity is a chaotic place, and the people here aren't exactly peaceful. Jinx... She's one of our own. She's a loose cannon, yes, but she's also a weapon we can use."

"An unpredictable weapon, you could say." you crossed your arms. "It's your mechanic arm today, but tomorrow could be the flesh one. You've lost your arm for the cause, there's no need to lose another, Sevika."

"I don't need you hovering over me like a mother hen," she snapped. "I can handle myself. I've been doing this long before you came along, and I'll be doing it long after you're gone."

You flinched over her distant tone, but you stood your ground again. "That's where you're wrong." you stated. "Cause I won't be gone, ever."

Sevika tilted her head, the bedsprings creaking under her weight as she sat up. “Don’t make promises you can’t keep,” she said finally.

"And don't promise Jinx won't blow on your face if you can't keep it." you stated.

Sevika sighed, reaching out for the glass of liquor on her bedside table. "Always using my words against me."

"I'm being frank." you said, your eyes flickering to the arm on the desk. "Your arm is ruined, I need to take it to the workshop. So don't expect to have it back soon."

“You—.” she started to protest, her temper flaring once more. “You’re not taking my arm. I need it.”

"You want a piece of junk for arm, then?" You inquired.

God, she was nearly losing it tonight.

“Fine,” she grumbled, reluctantly admitting defeat. “Take it to the workshop, then. But I better get it back in perfect condition, you hear me?”

"So you're threatening me now?"

Sevika slammed the glass on the table.

"I’m not threatening you.” she grumbled. "I’m just making it clear that I expect my arm back in pristine condition. I don’t have time to deal with any subpar repairs."

"When have I ever done it wrong, Sevika?" you said, turning to look for your shirt somewhere in the room. Being naked in an argument was not pleasant and Sevika let out a huff after your breasts weren't on sight anymore.

"Never." She admitted gruffly. "Your work is impeccable."

"Then don't doubt me," you stated, pulling on your pants before borrowing one of Sevika's cigarettes. You searched for your jacket on the coat rack.

Sevika sighed, realizing you were getting ready to leave. She wasn't stopping you, though, you no longer needed vigilance since your recovery developed smoothly. "Where are you going?" She asked.

"I have work to do at the workshop." you mumbled, picking your toolbox and Sevika's prostetic arm. "Don't wait for me, you need to sleep."

She hummed. "Be back before sunrise, got it? I don't want you out and late at night."

"Sure, ma'am."

"Don't 'ma'am' me." She spat. "Just… be careful, alright? This city isn’t safe at night. Even the shadows have teeth."

"And you're the teeth." You smirked, before Sevika groaned and reached out to pull you by the arm.

"One more funny reply and you're not leaving the apartment." She snapped at you.

You raised an eyebrow, like an insolent teenager who was beginning to question the authority of her parents. Sevika didn't scare you, she stopped doing so a long time ago, and certainly after having her trembling with your head between her legs, she didn't manage to intimidate you. "I hear." you nodded.

Sevika watched you leave, her eyes trailing after you with a mixture of frustration and desire. She couldn’t decide whether she wanted to strangle you or kiss you. As the door shut behind you, she let out a low grumble and took a deep drag from her cigarette. "Stubborn little shit…" she muttered, a small smirk playing at her lips.

Rumors flew as fast through the streets of Zaun as the Shimmer. It took no more than four hours to hear that Silco's daughter had appeared in the Last Drop like a scolded puppy, strangely docile without knowing when or who caused it. But the truth is that Jinx showed up at Sevika's office and apologized to Sevika for the bomb accident, placing a new, optimized mechanical arm on the table, wrapped in a gift ribbon.

Sevika could only attribute it to you.

What the hell did you do?

Sevika walked through the dimly lit corridors of The Last Drop, her eyes watchful and searching. She was looking for only one person - you.

When she finally found you in the repair shop, her footsteps halted. “Have a moment?” she asked, her voice gruff.

You dragged on your cigarette, turning around as you removed your goggles from your eyes and raised an eyebrow. You didn’t even bother to get up from the stool, your expression impassive, almost disinterested. "I'm busy."

Sevika's jaw tightened at your dismissive tone. It was infuriating how you could look so utterly disinterested, when you had her wrapped around your little finger. She stalked closer, her muscles tensing in irritation. "I didn’t ask if you were busy. I said I need to speak with you."

You placed the cauterizer on the table and Sevika leaned against a nearby workbench, arms crossed underneath her poncho. "Care to tell me what you did to Jinx?" she asked.

"Uh... nothing?" you asked. "Why would I have anything to do with her?"

"Don't play coy with me." she growled. "The girl suddenly shows up, apologizing and dropping off a new arm? That’s not her style. You’ve been meddling again, haven’t you?"

You couldn't help but chuckle. "Did she apologize?" you inquired.

"Yes, she did apologize. She even wrapped the damn arm in a gift ribbon. It's the most polite I've ever seen her be."

You dragged out your cigarette, making the ash flutter into the ashtray, a cup. “Jinx is so much more than a crazy girl, she’s talented,” you said. “I thought she could make up for her damn mistake by making you a new arm.”

"And you thought that by... what? Whispering a few pretty words in her ear, you could get her to make me a new arm?" she questioned, disbelief coloring her tone.

"Nothing a couple of threats and some good rhetoric can't fix," you said smugly, before Sevika slammed her fist on the table.

"You threatened Jinx?" she demanded, her eyes burning with anger. "Are you out of your damn mind? She's unpredictable, dangerous and—"

"She messed with you," you interrupted her. "And since you're not going to fight back, do you think I'm going to sit back and watch that, Sevika?"

"It's not your place to handle Jinx, that's my business. Stay out of it."

You sighed, taking a look at this colorful and flashy new arm of Sevika Jinx knew how to add her touch to the piece, from the colors, the slot machine aesthetic, and the claw where the hand should be. "Did you like it?" you asked, more softly this time.

She reached out slowly, her fingers tracing over the metal and the claw. "It's… adequate." she grunted.

"Good." you smiled. "I'm glad I trusted her that."

As soon as the problem seemed to be fixed, you turned your attention to the piece you were currently working on. Sevika let out a groan, realizing you got away with it again.

Why on Earth I fell for this woman? I have enough trouble on my own.

Sevika leaned against the workbench, her eyes glued to you as you hummed a soft tune, completely absorbed in your work. It was infuriating. As soon as Sevika started looking around, her eyes fell on Shimmer's strap-on resting on the table. She had to look at it twice to realize it was the one she asked you to make four months ago. Sevika thought she had lost it; in the brothel, people tend to take things that aren't theirs.

"I thought I lost that thing," she grumbled, picking it up to examine it.

"That?" you asked, your eyes flickering to the strap. "Hell no, I spent fifty-six hours on that thing."

"What on earth took so damn long?"

"The Shimmer system; quite a challenge." you said.

At that moment, you couldn't help but look at her. A question had been floating around in your head ever since the day you handed Sevika her commission. "Did you like it?" you asked. "Did it feel good to wear?"

Sevika huffed, toying with the strap on her hand before she smirked. "Honestly, girl? It's been the best thing I've ever wore."

You smiled subtly, your attention shifting to your tools even though the tingle of satisfaction remained in your stomach. “How are the commissions going?” asked Sevika.

“Too many for so few hands and hours of sleep.” you pointed out, smiling as Sevika’s expression hardened. “I won’t use Shimmer, calm down.”

"Good," she said gruffly, leaning against the table closer to you. "You better not, or I'll kick your ass."

Despite having arrived angry, your proximity had weakened her temper. Your scent, the heat of your body, it was driving her mad. She had a strong desire to grab you, pull you close, and kiss you senselessly.

"So..." you said. "You came here to call me out for messing with Jinx or just to check how am I doing?"

"Both," she grumbled, her arms still crossed, her eyes flickering down to your lips. “You’ve been sticking your nose where it doesn't belong... again.”

"Where should I stick it in, then?" you teased her.

"Not in my business, to start." she grumbled, uncrossing her arms as she stepped closer.

Before you could even respond, Sevika grabbed you by the waist and roughly pulled you into a searing kiss. Her pent-up frustration and need for you had finally boiled over, and she couldn't deny herself any longer. You whimpered, barely adjusting to the kiss before Sevika dragged whatever you had onto the workbench and pinned you against the surface. “Hey, watch my stuff!”

"Shut up," she growled against your mouth. "I’ll buy you more tools."

Shit, she's mad.

"Sev... the door..." you panted between kisses, already spreading your legs so she could settle between them. Her intensity did not give rise to protests.

"Anyone who dares to enter will lose their eyes," she grunted, bringing your leg around her waist.

Sevika didn't let you process every kiss and bite she placed on your skin, she was unleashed by frustration and desire. You cupped her neck and sighed, her lips on your neck, her right hand wandering over your breasts and abdomen. You reached for her vest, unbuttoning it as you kissed her vehemently. The sound of her vest hitting the floor echoed through the room, as did your gasps and sighs.

You just hoped that no one had to lose their eyes that night.

You sat up, catching one of her breasts between your lips as Sevika hissed, her hand playing with your bare thighs before she felt the urge to pull that denim skirt off you. Sevika was in no mood for foreplay, her patience already exhausted and she had no intention of saving any more for you after you had challenged her authority by messing with Jinx. She growled, undoing the clasp of your skirt and sliding it down your legs until it ended up on the workshop floor.

"One of these days, you won't get a kiss but your ass whipped instead." she grumbled.

And then, you moaned over her hand sneaking into your panties, rubbing your wet pussy with unexpectly gentle fingers. Her weight pressed against you, her mouth hovering over yours accompanied by soft pants.

"A kiss or two and you're all wet for me."

"I was jerking off before you came in." you lied with that insolent smile of yours.

"Thinking about me, I suppose."

Her fingers continued to rub you, her mouth stealing any protests you might have had. She loved how you came undone under her touch, how she could make you moan and gasp.

You couldn't help but chuckle, Sevika looked fed up with your crude humor, but she didn't complain either. You watched her spread kisses down your stomach, your hip, the inside of your thighs, like a lioness coming closer to its prey, before pulling aside the fabric of your panties and giving you a shameless lick.

"Mhm... shit..." you gasped.

You covered your mouth, your gasps coming out of your nose as you tried to silence Sevika’s slurping by turning on the milling machine, which was particularly loud when it first started. By then, Sevika was having a feast between your legs, her lips sucking and kissing, licking at the wetness that was pouring out of you like a waterfall.

“Fuck.” you hissed, your hand reaching for her hair.

You still hadn't gotten used to Sevika's rhythm, she ate you out like you were her last meal, not caring about getting your slick all over her nose and chin, or the way you rubbed against her mouth to get more contact. A good dish is best enjoyed with all the senses, regardless of getting dirty in the process.

She enjoyed knowing that you liked it, that she was able to draw whimpers from your throat and break your insolent demeanor. After a while, your legs seemed to tremble and Sevika pulled away with a loud inhale, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand.

"Why did you...?" you managed to gasp before noticing that Sevika was staring at the strap-on sitting on the next workbench.

Oh, shit.

"Turn around." she commanded, her voice low and husky with desire.

"Sev-"

"Baby, trust me." she whispered, her hand cupping your cheek. "I'll be gentle."

"If someone enters..." you panted.

"No one will enter. They're all too goddamn scared of me." she replied, her hand gently grabbing your hips and guiding you to face away from her.

You could barely handle the adrenaline, your whole body seemed to be electrified, your chest against the table as soon as you bent over, raising your hips. It was happening and you were absolutely thrilled. You felt a kiss on your shoulder, you trembled when you perceived Sevika's figure behind you before a wave of anxiety crossed your body.

You've made plenty of them, but you never had tried a strap-on.

Sevika gasped then, the Shimmer compartment connecting to the matrix in her arm and thus to her system. That current of Shimmer through her veins tickled her and tinted her eyes slightly purple. Sevika saw how tense you were, and it was making her heart ache. She wanted you to enjoy this, to experience the same pleasure she had felt when she used it on Robin. So, she let her lips wander over your shoulder, down your back, as she moved her body closer to yours. Her chest pressed against you, her fingers caressing your hips.

"Don't be nervous," she whispered, her breath hot against your ear. "I've got you."

You held on to the table, Sevika giving you kisses on the back of your neck while sliding the strap between your folds, back and forward, gently stimulating you. "You made it, remember? Don't you trust your work?"

You moaned softly. "I didn't think you were going to use it on me."

Sevika held your hip. "I trust your work. Trust me too."

Suddenly you felt her slide inside you, inch by inch your lips parted and you let out a muffled moan, silenced by Sevika's kisses on your neck. Your insides opened for her, contracting around the phallus with ease, ready to take her whole. "Breathe…" she whispered.

You gasped, holding onto the edge of the table as Sevika began to thrust gently, methodically and deeply, feeling her tits press against your back, your own against the surface of the workbench. The weight of both of you made the wood creak.

Frankly, if the table broke, Sevika wouldn't give a damn.

"You're doing so well…" she whispered. "I knew you would."

You straightened up, Sevika wrapping an arm around your chest as she increased the speed of her thrusts, allowing yourself to moan louder, showing her that deep inside your body was tickling with her presence, your core had a pulse of its own. "It feels... good..."

"It'll feel better, baby, keep up with me." she growled, wrapping her bicep around your throat as she dared to slam her hips harder this time. And you whimpered.

You created that strap, you spent hours sitting at that very same workbench, trial and error to achieve a unique piece capable of pleasing Sevika and her exquisite requirements. You designed it, you took the mold in her presence, you spent sleepless nights and woke up to continue working on it. And now Sevika was allowing you to try the fruit of your labor for yourself, and damn… it was wonderful.

Sevika fucked you without pause or hesitation, methodically as if it were a task that must be done conscientiously. She squeezed your breasts, licked your ear and rubbed your clitoris with her flesh hand, making you tremble and shudder. By then, you were dizzy and extremely sensitive, Sevika could not bear to fuck you without seeing your expression twist in pleasure.

So, she quickly pulled out and turned you over, her hands grabbing your hips and lifting you onto the table, sitting you down on the edge.

"Look at me." she gasped, kissing you at the same time she slide into you. You moaned into her mouth, an arm around her neck as you caught a glimpse of her purple eyes. "Fuck, you're so pretty."

"You're so high..." you panted.

"This is the closest you'll ever be to Shimmer again." she smiled, fucking you relentlessly.

Each thrust was a dose of Shimmer, each thrust shook her entire body and sent shivers down to her core. It was addictive and mesmerizing at the same time, she couldn't get enough of how good it felt. "Oh fuck… you feel so good." she whimpered.

"Mhm, Sev..." you moaned sweetly. "Harder."

The Shimmer didn't just heighten the sensations, it inhibited the shame and brought the emotions to the surface. That's why you weren't impressed when Sevika began to pour her heart out on the act.

"I don't deserve you..." she muttered, her tone weaker than she intended to. You cupped her cheek.

"Bullshit."

"If you dare to leave me, there will be nothing left of me," she confessed, a hand on your cheek and your foreheads met. Your breaths mingled together.

"I ain't leaving."

Sevika whimpered, the scars on her left cheek glistening, her eyes seeming to sparkle and then you realized the Shimmer was taking its toll on her. "Sev, take it off." you begged, but she lunged at you, her hips never stopping. "Sev!" you insisted, even though you were reaching your peak yourself.

"I can't..." she gasped, before she placed a weak kiss on your lips. "I love you."

"You lo- Ah, ah fuck...!" you couldn't contain yourself, the sudden orgasm knocking you down like a wave before you fell back on the workbench.

And your body went numb, the sound of the machine accompanying your and Sevika's gasps, until you heard her curse and throw the strap on the table. Sevika's voice was hoarse, almost like she was choking back tears, she closed her eyes and took a deep breath, trying to steady herself. The adrenaline, the Shimmer, the revelation of her feelings - it was all coursing through her, leaving her vulnerable and unsure of how to react.

You took a deep breath, rolling over to look at Sevika and notice the way she was shaking. You propped yourself on your elbow, reaching out to her. "I told you not to overuse it."

"I know..." she sighed, sitting on the edge of the table as you wrapped your arms around her. Your stomach fluttered, you inhaled her scent as if it were a fragrance you were trying to decipher, when in reality what you wanted to decipher were the words she said earlier.

All these years, this insolence and boldness just to get here. You had no regets.

"I love you too, Sev." you said softly then, every word rolling on your tongue.

She was quiet, her eyes fixed on yours as she took in what you had just said. "I know," she whispered, her voice barely above a breath. "And that terrifies me."

"I should be terrified of you." you smiled, noticing the way Sevika's eyes softened. You've never seen her like that. "But ever since I met you, I knew fear won't lead me nowhere."

"Most people are smart enough to stay away from me," she pointed out, her gaze dropping to the floor, before she grabbed your hand with her flesh one. "You're not smart."

You chuckled. "No, I'm not."

But Sevika knew well that no fool could get under her skin like you did; even if you had been a street rat, a Shimmer junkie and her personal mechanic.

She just hoped to call you wife one day.

The end.

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So, yeah, this fic is done. Do you know how much I enjoyed writing it? I really had a great time, even more so seeing your comments.

Girls, it's been an honor to have entertained you, I'll keep cooking up as many more as my delusional brain can come up with. THANK YOU ALL <3

#arcane #arcane fanfic #league of legends #arcane s2 #arcane sevika #arcane smut #sevika arcane #sevika x reader #sevika x y/n #sevika x you #slow burn BURNING #love cofessions yass baby #some delusional shit #sapphic #wlw #sevika my woman #sevika the butch you are #some shit

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tokoyan · 2 months ago

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Please I need the part 2 of what and where Seung-Je will get us to 😭 Bro I'm just so in love with him.

- Kneeling in fear

pairing: Geum Seong-je x reader

Warning: Abuse, dehumanization, manipulation, threats

word count: 1,232

a/n: girl i can't even blame you i'm genuinely SO obsessed with this man 😭 im thinking of making the next part nsfw but idk 🤷🏾‍♀️

pt1 // pt2 // pt3

As he dragged me towards his motorcycle parked outside the school, he forcibly told me to get on without even sparing me a glance. I didn't want to get on but fearing he might hurt me, I complied.

As he waited for me to get on, he quickly lit a cigarette and placed it between his lips before getting on the bike.

"Hold tight" he said to me.

i hated those words.

he was the last person that should even care about my safety, whats the point in telking me that if you're just going to drag me to who knows where.

he then suddenly sped off. Due to the sudden speed, I quickly held onto him tightly, scared of falling off as this was also my first time on a motorcycle.

it shouldn't be my first time, espescially not like this.

After a while, he went into a few alleys and started to slow down before coming to a halt in front of a rather eerie street in front of a square-like building. I wasn't sure what it was. He got off first, took the cigarette out of his mouth, threw it on the floor, and crushed it under his foot. He then finally looked at me. "Get off" he said bluntly as he waited for me to dismount.

As I got off his bike, he parked it right there and without saying anything started walking towards the building. I quickly followed behind him in fear of what he wouldve dont to me IF i hadn't followed him. As he took out bundled up keys from his pocket, he searched for the right one and put it inside the lock of the big door, making it slide open. He then looked at me, his expression making it obvious that he wanted me to enter.

"Seong je... where are we?" I said, now actually trembling. I started fearing for my life. He didn't say anything as he walked over to the couch in the middle of the room, sat down, and spread his legs. He took out a box of cigarettes and lit another one.

"Seong je, please, I'm so sorry. I'll have the money by tomorrow, I swear," I started to say. "Ugh, shut the fuck up," he said annoyed as he leaned against the couch.

I didn't know what to say or do. What was worse was that I was locked inside this building. I saw a few motorcycles at the side and a sign that said "Union". I wasn't sure what it meant but i knew that i shouldn't be here.

"Get on your knees," he said bluntly as he looked at me from across the room. I just looked at him in complete shock. "What?"

"Are you deaf? I said get on your fucking knees," he said louder this time, his impatience growing.

Fearful that he was going to hurt me, I slowly lowered myself to the ground, putting one knee down, tears starting to fall down my face. "Oh my god, this whore is so fucking stupid," he said loudly to himself as he looked at me again.

"Dumb bitch, come here and get on your knees," he commanded. As I got up and slowly started to walk to him I began pleading and begging, "Please don't... I'll have the money by tomorrow, I swear" I said, still crying as I finally reached him. It felt like even if I did have the money, he didn't care, he just wanted me on my knees.

He didn't say anything, he just waited for me to get on my knees. So, I softly but slowly got on my knees and looked at the floor.

That sick bastard then started laughing,

"So pathetic, bitches like you are truly only good for getting on their knees and nothing more," he said as he belittled me.

"Look at me," he said, suddenly changing his demeanor as he looked at me, but my head was still down. I was scared but too embarrassed to look at him.

"Don't fuck with me right now. I said look at me," he said, now losing patience. But I was still looking down in embarrassment, fear, and a longing to just go home.

Before I knew it, he had grabbed a fistful of my hair and dragged me to look at him. My mascara was running down my face, I was shaking in fear, and now I was also wincing in pain due to him grabbing my hair.

"Pretty faces like yours are only good for being fucked and nothing more," he said as he took the cigarette out of his mouth and hovered the burning part close to my face.

"Don't start crying on me now, bitch. Want me to burn you?" he said, threatening to put his cigarette on my face to burn me. "N-no please.." I said, sobbing. "So then do what I fucking tell you to do," he says with that... sick grin on his face.

What he did next to me was absolutely disgusting.

#whc #whc2 #whc1 #weak hero class #weak hero class x reader #weak hero class 2 #weak hero class 2 x reader #geum seong je x reader #geum seong je #seong je #wolf keum #wolf keum x reader #whc2 angst

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eijiroukiriot · 2 years ago

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i'm looking through old posts and i cannot BELIIIIIIEVE this is an ask i got all the way back then. planetary is one of my ABSOLUTE favorite bkg songs these days. the way this verse twists the "i'm unbelievable" back on itself and then gets so much louder and anti-self-deprecation, anti-what-people-say-about-you with every line makes me think of bkg and pick up my walking pace and laugh at myself for it

i actually can't stress enough to you how much i listen to this as a bkg song these days. i can't BELIEVE i was put on to it all that time ago and i didn't get it!!! i'm genuinely so sorry. i'm sorry i didn't see the vision

My fav song that has Bakugou Energy is Planetary (Go!) by MCR

LOVE a good mcr song for bkg, i’m sort of surprised though because i’ve never listened to that song and it’s unexpectedly upbeat? both for what i expected it to sound like as a mcr song and a bkg song

#FAME IS NOW INJECTABLE! PRO! CESS! THE PRO! GRESS!!!!#I! I CAN'T! SLOW! DOWN! I WON'T BE WAITING FOR YOU!!!!#wow what a weird wake-up call to realize i heard one of my current favorite songs a few years ago and didn't like it #i saw mcr earlier this year mostly for the experience bc i still hadn't heard the vast majority of their discography #and they've been probably about 2/3 of what i've listened to since then #planetary is specifically one of my top 3 songs of theirs #literally just the other night at karaoke i made my friend (he very graciously agreed) cold-sing it with me #bc i wanted to sing it so bad but nobody else knew it #just the confidence to be loud and showy and shoot people down with a grin #the whole image that makes up great explosion murder god dynamight is so true to what he wants to be it feels so honestly rebellious to me #which i laugh at myself for bc bkg's worked so hard to be able to be who he is while still being within The System #fundamentally not rocking the boat very much. working towards being better at working smoothly together with the people around him #interning at endeavor agency #some real hero world rebel #so i laugh at myself for hearing the verses about like tearing the system apart at its core #and thinking this is SO real. this is SO bkg #but i can't really help it. he's so loudly and unabashedly the person that he is and that's not changing. and that's cool #i always come back to the moment in the baths just after the apology when everyone's groaning like ugh so he's not getting any quieter huh #like yeah. he's not. like literally #ofc cultural context and everything. obviously bkg's character is so entirely the classic japanese teen delinquent #it's just that he's gonna keep acting how he wants while also genuinely growing and finding patience for more things and more people #and wearing a tie to school #i'll stop talking bc i'm losing the plot and really need to seriously reread bnha before making a thesis about this point #refusing to relinquish the person you are is pretty god damn punk #if my velocity starts to make you sweat then just don't let go!!#please don't say anything to me abt talking abt bkg mostly in present and future tense even with the current context of the manga 😭

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fishnapple · 7 months ago

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The purpose of your life, why you're here

This reading is about finding the purpose of your life, why you're here, your current reincarnation (if you believe in reincarnation), or your soul, what you're born into this world to experience. All 6 groups share a similar theme of reaching your highest potential and having the focus on connections.

A similar reading was also done by @claudiafrankie, you can check out their reading here

This is a general reading meant for multiple people. Take only what resonates and leave out the rest.

Your feedback is much appreciated. If you find the reading resonated with you, leave a comment, I’d love to know 🎐

About me | Masterpost Book a reading with me - KO-FI (→ personal reading)

ROSE QUARTZ

Keywords: inspiration, leading, expansion, mastery, mental power, innovation, connection to the psyche

I see the theme of big vs small, how we define our life, give meaning to it. Are we just a tiny entity that exists in the sea of existence, or are we the whole universe, embracing everything?

In your life, you will encounter many instances where you're asked to step forward, step outside, go out of your comfort zone. You will be put into experiences that tell you how knotted your life has been and how much it could unravel into something more spontaneous. There's a fight between wanting to focus on the physical plane, doing daily tasks perfectly, concern yourself with details, with what is happening around you and the need to do something bigger, having more impact and influence, to make a change to the world, to live the life you dream about. Confinement vs freedom.

You have a lot to tell, so much to share, so much to experience. At your core, you're an adventurer, a nomad, life is a journey that you need to keep moving. You want to achieve great things, leave a mark in this world and receive adoration from people. But the first step in your journey will be facing your wounds. They are the door that stands between you and the freedom outside. Are you ready to turn the doorknob and push that door? In the past, in your past lives, you might have experienced confinement, mentally, physically, spiritually. You kept standing there and facing the door but didn't decide what to do. So in this life, you're given a choice to choose again.

You might think the components to your success in life are outward actions, ambitions, and material achievements, showing how capable you are. Your mind is buzzing with ideas, with the future, always looking for a new way to do things better, to perfect what you're focusing on, like a windshield wipers working tirelessly on a stormy day. The next piece of information, the exciting new discoveries, the buzzing trends, they busy your mind until it becomes fatigued and obsessed.

Your purpose of this lifetime is to learn how to rest, when to stop, and how to use the information and resources you have gathered to build yourself up effectively. What defines you is not how much you have, how good you are at certain jobs, but how you master yourself and become the highest aspiration of yourself.

To do that takes patience and understanding of yourself. Turning inward, curbing the restless mind and impulses. You might be someone who is quite impatient or impulsive, wanting to execute right away the idea you have in mind, what you think of should be what you have, expecting results and excellence quickly, if things don't go well from the first try, you want to give up and change direction, change the method without giving the old ones enough time to develop. If you are this person, then life will give you many opportunities or challenges to slow you down, the more you try to act, to fix things, tossing ideas everywhere, going around in many directions at once, the more likely you are to be confined and forced to make a clear choice and commit to it. And you will have to choose wisely. How do you do it? By facing that door, those wounds, see how they are projected into your surroundings, your relationships with people, how you go around, anywhere, just to avoid them.

You're given a good pair of eyes (figuratively, or can be literally) to truly see, amidst all those busy movements, a path for yourself. A wide, unexplored path. Pushing the door, stepping out is scary, but you're brave and you will inspire many others to do the same.

LABRADORITE

Keywords: growth, healing, comfort, peace, helping, courage, accepting changes

I see the image of a sword or a cross. Your energy feels young and soft yet resilient and brave. Life gives you many challenges that would forge a sharp and strong blade inside you. The sword here is not for harming or conquest but for protection and striking the lock, through layers of fears that have been imprisoning you for a long time.

Your life is divided or, rather, balanced by two opposing forces and choices. One is the past, the habit, the way you chose to protect your safety. You might have a tendency to go along with other people's wishes or try to avoid direct confrontation for fear of disrupting the peace. This might be one of your defence mechanisms when dealing with life in general. You want to live in peace, quietly go about your way without obstruction and intrusion from outside. This creates a demure aura, in some way, a little submissive or malleable energy. You don't act this way because you want to gain something from other people. You just don't find it necessary to engage in confrontations that lead to dead-end.

The other side is something you're called to embrace more of in this lifetime. Your energy is soft and flowy, like water, but it needs a little solidifying into something more sturdy. It's the hardening of the core self. Hardening here does not have a negative connotation, it's not about building walls around yourself, closing your heart and spirit, acting cold and tough, it's not like that. It's about being more sure of yourself, giving yourself a sturdy and durable foundation, like how a pliable sprout would grow into a robust tree, standing tall and firm on the ground.

Work and career, material achievements will be the ground where you will see yourself grow the most in this lifetime. There will be opportunities and chances for you to break out of your nest and explore. The work environment will be dynamic and full of pleasant surprises. You will find support through the people you work with. A family member might be a crucial figure in your process of becoming the best version of yourself.

I feel a very giving nature, you have so much in yourself, so much to share, that inner abundance, with people, with life. But only when you release the attachments that keep you rooted in constricted safety. There might be hesitancy when trying to think about bigger aspirations, about your life dreams. You might think that those dreams are unrealistic or too far away. Your mind and your heart are going in the opposite direction. Your heart wants to look forward, to the distant, unexplored horizon, while your mind is occupied by anxiety and uncertainty. It's the root of the great divide between your past and your future.

But I think in this lifetime, things will change. Your life is in a great transition period. Events might happen quickly, surprises come more often. What you've been believing in, what you've been doing habitually might suddenly become strange and feel foreign to you. These changes are necessary, you might feel uncomfortable having to depart from what you've been attached to. But if you can muster enough courage to go against the usual, it will be a personal victory for you. You will successfully break the earth above you and shoot up, out of dormancy, to begin a new adventure.

RED JASPER

Keywords: manifestation, beauty, to connect, freedom, commitment, wish vs reality

It feels like you have a starter kit of manifesting love but you haven't learnt how to use them fully yet. Love and other connections will be the focal point of this lifetime for you.

You have a unique power of manifestation. Have you ever had some thoughts and then a few days or some time later, they came true?. Everything could manifest instantly that you might even be scared of your own thoughts, afraid that any "wrong" thought will result in a bad future. If you haven't realised this about yourself, be more mindful and observe how things work around you. Life will feel a lot more magical for you.

One of the reasons why your thoughts are so powerful is because you're given full reign, full freedom to experience this world. It's not something that you can easily realise and put into practise. There's no particular script nor strict rules for you to follow, you just need to experience as many things as possible. The best gift you have in this lifetime is freedom. I think this gift is something hard-earned from countless trials and hardships. The memories of distant pains might still linger somewhere deep inside you, keeping you from fully being free to dream. But no more rules and burdens. This life is meant to be savoured in its vastness. You're a born rebel. Carving your own path, going your own way, never settling, never being fully at ease with the present, always on the lookout for a different future.

And that's where relationships come in. One of the best ways to do that is through relationships and interacting with others. I see a tendency to be hasty or quick to move on when it comes to bonds with other people. With your manifesting ability, combine with your natural charms, you have no problem with meeting and building the connection with someone. But something about commitment might scare you. You might not want to commit because of the fear that your freedom will be lost, or because you put a heavy importance on a commitment that you don't want to step into one too lightly. You might jump, too quickly, into conclusions about some connections. Maybe you would try to find a plausible reason to stop the connection, in the name of practicality and logic, ready to find flaws in the other person, or, on the opposite end, you decide too quickly that this is it, this person is the one and then try to commit, prematurely. It's like you are given something because you wished for it, but then you don't exactly know what to do with it. This will be one of your biggest lessons in this lifetime. To follow through with what you wish for, to commit to something fully and wisely. It's not just romantic relationships but also other relationships, colleagues, friends, families, etc.

There would be two types of people in your life who can guide or lead you into two different directions. They will appear in the form of mentors, someone older or more experienced than you, someone whom you feel you can learn something significant from. One type will encourage you to find your calling, your path. Who will constantly touch your deepest feelings without even trying. They may trigger you, for good or for bad, you would feel their choices of words and actions are dubious and questionable, but there is something undeniably inspiring about them, they push you to be more bold and get in touch with your needs and wishes. While the other type would be someone wanting to dictate every move in your life under the guise of knowing what's good for you. They are powerful, they can make your wishes come true but only if you come under their wings and stay there. You would feel like a child being well taken care of, but your wings will be clipped. Which direction to take is ultimately your choice, you choose whatever to experience, because that's your freedom in this lifetime.

CITRINE

Keywords: uncharted water, discovery, exploration, crossing, in between, balanced, transition

I see your path in this life is going to the unknown, something that you haven't experienced before. You are standing at a gate, a bridge in between two lands. Or, in the vertical sense, you are standing on the dark ground, looking up at the sun, shining bright from above. There are lots of movements, both mentally and physically. In this lifetime, you will constantly move between the two worlds. The inner, dark and cold sea of your private world and the bright, warm air of the outside world. No world is better than other, they need to be their for your life to be in balance, staying in one world for too long and neglecting other will likely result in some events taking place to pull you back into balance.

These two worlds are parallel to each other. The inner world is led chiefly by your mind, they are well organised, block by block, neatly like a library, while the outer world is more dynamic, led by passion and actions. They affect each other in every way, more than you realise. Chaos in the inner thought will likely result in confusion and, in some extreme cases, destruction of the known path. You will stumble upon many paths that are considered strange and out of the norm, but I think you're geared towards them, even unknowingly, your mind has a knack of seeing the unique structure of things, noticing the pattern and the likely outcomes of situations that not many people can. This will help you see more alternatives in life and choose a path that can bring satisfaction to you, in all senses, materially, spiritually, emotionally. This path will likely be an uncharted water, something that not many people have done, there will be many unexplored areas for you to bring in your unique takes.

Another way the two worlds interact with each other is what your inner world needs, the outer world will provide. If you feel anxious and doubtful, haunted by past memories, then you will likely encounter something or someone new who can give you fresh perspectives and encouragement to be brave. If you feel your life is lacking security, you feel low in your self esteem, there will be moments of transformation that bring you closer to what you desire, you will be given opportunities to venture into new territory, meeting new people, getting the support you need to start something. The universe hears your every call and answers back with opportunities, emphasis on the word "opportunities", you won't be given a whole cooked dish, you will be given ingredients to make the dish.

There's an element of settlement. Instead of jumping from place to place, in this lifetime, you need to hold onto something, to make something uniquely yours, something that will be by your side everywhere you go. It could be a legacy, a creation, a lesson, something that lasts. But it's not about stubbornly holding on to something, it has to be integrated into your core being. Throughout life, you will face with many events that will change your perspective drastically, you're not meant to hold on to old beliefs, withered branches that can no longer hold the weight of the birds standing on them. You will constantly meet new people, those that will open your eyes. Foreign people and cultures might fascinate you, somewhere with lots of sunlight, warm hospitality, beautiful scenery and architecture, lots of mountains and flowers. Especially if you're someone who's from a land near the sea, windy and cold, lots of rain and stormy weather. You are a traveller at heart, don't limit yourself to any particular place.

AMETHYST

Keywords: opinion, communication, conflict, to uphold, straightforward, honesty, truth

I don't know why, but upon seeing your spread, the phrase "human comedy" just sprang up in my mind. This life of yours will go through so many ups and downs in regards to connections and relationships. You will experience the full spectrum of them, every facet, every emotion.

You might encounter many situations where you're misunderstood greatly, those will create a very interesting dynamic between you and the world. Interesting might not be the right word, even my choice of word in this reading is muddled up, you might have the tendency to use words that make your intentions seem questionable or odd to people, and they do the same to you. It's like people from different lands from all around the world gathered for a meeting but there's no common language and no one to translate.

Communication will be the point of focus for you. You might struggle to find the right expression, the right words for the things you want to say. Thoughts seem a lot more clear and articulated in your head, but when they are uttered, there's this fog around you that tends to twist and blur the words, making them shift and fuddle. You will need to find a way to clear this fog, to deliver your words in the most direct and straightforward way as much as possible, even at the risk of being blunt and offensive. This might create an obsession or anxiety when communicating. Maybe you want to find the perfect expression, the details, you do notice the tendency of people misunderstanding you so you try so hard to elaborate, which can create the impression of being long winded, rambling or argumentative.

Ideas jump around in your head, constantly born and spread, demand to get out, to be expressed, this forms a rushing energy, impatient tongue. But even with all these misunderstandings, you don't actually offence people. They may perceive you as nitpicking, blunt, or argumentative, but they don't necessarily hate you for it. On the contrary, some even find it amusing and endearing, these people might even intentionally tease or poke at you, it's not malicious, but then again, you also don't read people's intentions too clearly and might perceive these acts of teasing as personal attack. Your reactions would rile those people up even more. Hence, the endless cycles of poking and reacting. The purpose of all of these is to train your resilience of the mind and heart. You should take all of these with good spirit, laugh them off, keep your truth and speak honestly, there's nothing more attractive than that.

On a more serious note, you're reminded to stand firm in your thoughts. I sense that you have so many wisdom to share with the world. Teaching might be a calling for you. Even without actually be in the education field, people can still learn from you, through your unshakable conviction in yourself and the way you speak your truth. It might be intense, it might be difficult to swallow, it might seem strange and outlandish, but nevertheless, it captivates the world through its sincerity.

AVENTURINE

Keywords: artist, bridge, the call, emotional landscape, go with the flow, sensitivity

"Young poet of the moon", "The poet of the soul", those two just appeared in my head upon seeing your spread, so I wanted to write them down. I think those words portrayed you pretty well. Your inner artist heart is beating every moment, it's a force that you can't hide or be ushered into oblivion by some circumstances.

This world needs a lot of people who have a sensitive heart, like you, someone who has the "eyes" to see the beauty in this world, the "ears" to hear its cry and whisper, the "lips" to court it with sweet sweet words. You're here to make people see the world in its naked beauty, helping them realise the small details of living and in the process, elevate their souls.

You offer this world a cup filled with creativity. The way your mind and heart tremble and come alive with all the senses can create striking new creations. The passion for sensuality is there, for the bursting love of life. Sensuality here encompasses a vast spectrum of things, from the aromas of delicious food, the cool and smooth feeling of water lapping over you, the swirling colours of leaves dancing under the sun, the warm and rough feel of someone's hands, ... they are all the materials for you to marvel at, to create, to give back to the world your interpretation of it.

Why did I say "poet" in the beginning? Because you have the gift of gab, your words resonate with people's hearts, because they are spoken from the realm of the unknown inside all of us, we can only be able to catch a glimpse of it here and there, when we allow ourselves to relax and float. You have the ability to connect to that realm , to catch sights of it more often and crystallise those sights into words or messages conveyed by other means. But I sense written words strongly. Even if you do something that isn't related to creativity or the art (but is there anything that truly be detached from creativity?), this gift will still assist you in every endeavour you're in, negotiating, mediating, persuading, counselling, anything that needs these kinds of skills.

Love will play an important role in your life, you're here to experience love in all of its forms, experience all the feelings it can create within us. It won't be an easy journey, heartaches are there, but so is the deepest devotion. You might face delays in love or intense connections that leave lasting marks on your soul. You're not the same person you once were before a connection. These will transform you, plunging you into greater depth and strange waters. But don't be afraid,if you allow yourself to savour the journey, you will arrive at a treasure that many people have been struggling to find. This inexhaustible treasure will provide richness to your life. Also, don't let yourself drowned either, emerge out of the water and share with the world what you've seen. So many people need their hearts touched by a soul such as yours.

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pboogerswbb · 7 months ago

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TOO LOST IN YOU - part IX

Paige Bueckers x bartender!oc

Warnings: emotional rollercoaster-ish? p having her last game :( SMUT (handcuffs...)

Wordcount: 11.9K

A/N: this is it, the final chapter. i know it's incredibly long but people voted to have a longer chapter instead of two parts so this is what i did. i genuinely can not thank every person who has read/liked/reposted this series enough - i never thought so many people would show so much love for what i've written and it genuinely moves me as a writer. i'm feeling surprisingly emotional letting go of Valerie and Paige, but i know the time has come. expect an epilogue eventually, but also tune in for my next series So It Goes, which will be a much longer project! anyways genuinely, ty from the bottom of my heart, i'm grateful for each and every person reading this <3 ALSO HAPPY GAME DAY WE BETTER DUNK ON ND IDC

“Shot clock at four, Chen to Bueckers,”

The four seconds somehow feel closer to a minute, time slowing down around me, people moving in slow motion as I step back and get settled behind the three point line. With a flick of my wrist I let the ball fly.

“Bueckers for three…”

My eyes follow the ball as it soars in an angle, silently praying it’s the correct one I had practiced over and over as it starts coming down. I barely hear the crowd roaring, everyone on their feet. This was our last chance and it was all up to me. What could be my final game in this uniform, with these people I loved could be over in a matter of seconds. I let the gratitude wash over me. If this is it then I’m incredibly blessed, but please God, don’t let this be it.

Like instant gratification for my faith, with a swish the ball slips through the net, the buzzer going off, barely audible over the uproar of the crowd deafening me.

“GOT IT! Bueckers brings Huskies to a two point lead, taking them to the final four!”

The waves of relief and adrenaline fill me from head to toe when my teammates run to me, all of us jumping up and down. Clammy hands are grabbing me everywhere, squeezing my shoulder and ruffling my hair. We did it, the National Championship barely out of our reach now.

“Thank God!” I sigh in relief, looking up to the sky in a silent prayer. I’m interrupted as the girls around chant “BDB, BDB” over and over, all circling me with excitement. I feel overjoyed, all the sacrifices, challenges I’d been through were worth this moment. I feel my eyes well up as I take it all in, the girls laughing with joy all around me, the crowd cheering louder than ever before this season, and Coach walking to me and patting my shoulder. That’s all I needed to know what he meant. I made him proud. The moment is nearly perfect, only one person missing to make it complete.

“BABE??” Valerie’s voice comes through the phone harshly, speaking loud over a chattering crowd of people.

“Why are we yelling?” I chuckle, leaning my back against the changing room wall, cold on my sweaty back.

“BABY THAT WAS INSANE!” She says, voice excited. “I’M AT TED’S SO I CAN’T REALLY HEAR YOU.”

“I’m so happy but fuck I miss you ma-”

“Wait Paige you there?!” She speaks over me, clearly not hearing a word.

“Val can you hear me?”

“P? You there?”

The beeps stop me, the call over before it even began. Rubbing my jaw I feel a twinge in my chest. All I wanted right now was her, the lost connection only reminding me more of the distance between us. It felt uncomfortable, almost painful in my body to be so far away from her.

the connections bad ):

paige i’m so fucking proud of you, you should’ve seen me i was jumping up and down

That’s okay ma. Wish I seen it too.

Wish u were here

It was selfish of me, in fact I had been the one to tell Valerie not to come watch us play. Last time she watched me, I’d been a mess. I couldn’t risk being distracted this time.

I had found my groove quickly, the fine line between being Paige Buckets and girlfriend Paige. A lot of it was due to Valerie’s surprising patience with me while I figured all this out. Somehow it made me better on the court too - I never found myself pretending to be someone else anymore. However, having my girl in the crowd watching me, cheering me on, well that was a different subject. I couldn’t help but fear that her presence would have me messing up, getting unfocused. And now wasn’t the time to test the waters. So I had told her to stay home.

Valerie wanted anything but that, her mouth quickly turning into a frown as I told her no. But after some arguing back and forth I sweet talked her out of it.

“I thought you’d want me there,” her words still echoed in my head. As much as it pained me to admit, Valerie was right. Now that it was all done, all I wanted was my girl on my arm.

told you

Call me when u get home?

are you tryna get rid of me?

Never

good

My voice is slurred as I lock myself in the bathroom, hands clumsily handling the lock before I coo into the phone.

“Babyyyy,”

“Paige, are you drunk?” Valerie chuckles. I nod as if the girl on the phone could see me. After we won the drinks had been flowing, me and the girls locking ourselves into one of the hotel rooms and sharing a bottle of Tito’s. It wasn’t necessarily allowed but Geno and CD were usually good sports about it, turning their backs and letting us do what kids in college did.

“Perhaps,” I giggle, which makes the girl on the phone let out a bright laugh.

“You’re really milking that Unrivaled ad huh? Never heard you say that word in my life before that,” she teases.

“Are you tryna say I’m bad with words? What about ‘work tour’ and ‘I did all I could so God could do all I can’t’? Now those went hard.”

“Paige I’ve seen the folder on your phone full of lil things like that for you to say. You’re not that slick,” Valerie laughs into the phone. She was right of course. I wasn’t that slick. I might’ve been embarrassed by the way I’d been exposed, but I simply couldn’t. Hearing her voice, even when insulting me, had me weak in the knees.

“I love you,” I sigh into the phone, leaning against the cold marble of the bathroom sink.

“I love you too, P. I meant what I said earlier. I’m so fucking proud of you,” she murmurs, voice turning softer like it always did when she was telling me something important.

Grinning to myself a sinister thought flashes across my mind, which I would usually keep to myself but the alcohol in my blood had me feeling bold.

“Whatchu wearing ma?”

Valerie scoffs and giggles into the phone, “Bro chill!”

“C’mon Val I won big today and I miss my girl,” I whine, the foolproof method to get the brunette to bend to my will working this time too.

“Well I just got in bed,” she murmurs, I hear her shifting. “Just in that T-shirt you left and panties.”

For a moment I close my eyes imagining her, smooth legs sprawled over the blanket, bare tits so easy to expose just by pulling that damn shirt off.

“What kinda panties?” I ask, my voice now hoarse and deeper than before.

“You’re not with the girls still?” Val asks but I’m quick to answer, impatient for the detail I had asked for.

“I’m alone, I’m in the bathroom in my room. What kinda panties?”

The phone catches the heavy sigh Valerie lets out, a sign of her own arousal growing, caused by the urgency, sheer need in my voice.

“Red ones, the lace ones with the bows?”

I cuss under my breath, pressing my thighs together, eyes still closed envisioning my girl.

“Take the shirt off,” I command, Valerie shifting to pull the top off.

“It’s off,” she whispers, her voice breathy with need.

Biting my lip I throw my head back, desperate for her. “Can you show me ma?”

She doesn’t hesitate, less than a minute later a notification comes through. Fumbling with my phone I finally get the picture open, letting out an audible groan. It’s my girl lying on her back, back arching so her breasts are perked up, the bows of the red panties decorating her body, thick thighs pressing together deliciously. I can’t help but drag my hand into my sweatpants, sliding it beneath my boxers to find some sort of relief to my need.

“Fuck ma you’re so sexy,” I groan, my fingers swirling in my folds, making my knees shake. “You should- ah shit, you should play with yourself.”

“Yeah?” she asks so innocently I nearly come.

“Yea baby, I am.”

Suddenly I hear her gasping, which only makes me groan more. The adrenaline of the game, the post win euphoria and the need for my girl had made me soaked and the picture was only spurring me on.

“Tell me how wet that pussy is,” I whimper into the phone, the sounds of Valerie’s moans turning me on even more. The marble is cold against my lower back, but I’m only paying attention to the sounds filling my ear, and the way my fingertips rub against my clit, getting me to the edge quickly.

“So- so wet P, all for you,” she whines.

“Need you to finger yourself baby,” I order, squeezing my eyes shut, lost in the memory of how her cunt felt squeezing my fingers. “Imagine it’s me.”

The girl lets out a sharp inhale, and I know she’s working herself close to the edge.

“Fuck a dub, you’re my prize,” I murmur into the phone, trying to control my moans. My words are only encouraging the brunette, making her moan louder.

“Baby, need you here so bad,” she cries out, voice turning more high pitched. I let my head lull back as I rub my clit in sloppy circles, feeling myself teetering the edge.

“I know baby, ‘m right here,” I breathe heavily, feeling my slick cover my fingers. “I’m not gon’ last long Val.”

Hearing that does it, her moans turning desperate in that familiar way - she was there too.

“P I’m gonna come!”

“Shit baby, come on,” I let out a groan, my fingers quickly working me over the edge as I listen to Valerie’s moans on the phone. Waves of pleasure wash over me as I grip the sink behind me, watching the picture of Valerie nearly naked on my screen. I lucked out.

“Oh fuck,” Valerie breathes into the phone as she comes down, my own legs still shaking from the climax.

“I know,” I exhale and pull my hand out of my pants, allowing some space for both of us to calm down. Now that I was feeling more sober it really hit me hard, the distance. All I wanted was to wrap my arms around her and inhale the scent of her hair, feel her body molding into mine. I know Valerie feels it too when I hear her speak.

“Can’t believe you’re moving to Dallas soon,” she murmurs quietly, her voice small.

We had been tactically avoiding the conversation, both of us having the same fears of how the discussion might go. Long-distance was hard for anyone, but I barely knew how to be in a relationship. In only the last week or so we had ran into many issues mostly caused by me and my lack of communication skills. I was learning fast and I wanted to for her - but the weight of the future felt heavy on my chest and doubt was starting to creep in. Not all the time, but in moments like this. When I saw a glimpse of what might lie ahead of us. Many nights like these.

I had grown enough to know that this wasn’t the time to have that discussion though.

“Hey maybe I’ll get drafted to the Sparks, we don’t know yet,” I joke trying to lighten the mood, as if that was any better. Well for me it was, I wouldn’t have to live in fuck ass Dallas.

“Mhm,” she mumbles and I could tell from her voice reality was hitting her quick. Last thing I wanted was for her to be upset, so I try to steer the conversation once more.

“I’m so excited for this date I got planned baby, you’re gon love it,” I murmur into the phone washing my hands. Her tone shifts, now slightly lighter.

“It better be good, I’ve been waiting,” she jokes and I let out a sigh of relief knowing the difficult conversation could be pushed off to another day.

“Oh trust, it will be.”

I check my hair one more time, my brunette locks in a perfect blowout when there’s a faint knock on the door.

“Valerie! It’s for you I think,” my roomie Amy shouts. I quickly grab a sweater to throw over the black long bodycon dress I was wearing in case it got cold, taking my purse to go open the door. I could feel excitement swirling in my gut for our first date. Giddy like a child on Christmas morning I tiptoe to the door, my roomies all whistling at how good the dress made my ass look - which was precisely the reason I wore it.

Opening the door I’m met with a huge bouquet of deep red roses before I even see the blonde holding them. Gasping I grab the flowers, burying my nose in and inhaling.

“Oh my Goooood,” I gleam, letting the floral scent fill my nostrils. Finally lifting my gaze I see Paige, with a stupid wide grin on her face watching me, looking fine as hell as usual. Her blonde hair is slicked back in a bun, wearing black cargos and a white long sleeve, diamond studs decorating her ears and a chain with the number 5 hanging off her neck.

“You look so good,” I gasp and throw myself at the blonde, wrapping my arms around her dramatically and kissing her. She chuckles but kisses me back, but when she sees my outfit her face falls.

“Val, the dress…”

I immediately frown, feeling self-conscious. “Oh… you don’t like it?”

“Oh God no I love it, wanna take it off you right now,” she says her voice low and quiet so my roommates don’t overhear. “But you’re gon’ get cold baby.”

“Well you didn’t tell me what to dress for,” I say slightly annoyed, still holding the bouquet. If she wanted me to dress a certain way she could’ve let me know. I was trying to give Paige the benefit of the doubt. She wasn’t used to any of this, real dates, a real girlfriend.

“You right that’s my bad,” Paige murmurs, scratching the back of her neck. “You should change into something a lil warmer tho. I’ll put the flowers in a vase for you ma.”

“Fine.”

With a defiant groan I march into my room, leaving Paige to chat with my roommates, Amy and Layla. Neither the biggest fans of the basketball star after seeing the rollercoaster she put me through since we met. I knew they were still suspicious. I was just hoping Paige’s charms could win them over.

Taking off my dress I stand in the carefully picked lingerie staring into my wardrobe. Suddenly the door opens, the tall blonde making her way in and whistling when her eyes fall on the purple set on my body.

“NO! You’re not supposed to see yet!” I yelp and try to cover up with a pillow - unsuccessfully. Laughing, Paige closes her eyes and walks over to me bumping into my desk until her stretched out hands land on my ass.

“Well hello,” she grins, wiggling her brows, eyes still squeezed shut.

“Paige!! Stop!” I complain, though I liked the way her hands were feeling me up everywhere.

“Hey! I’m not lookin at least, gimme something,” she says and stands behind me, her hands snaking around to squeeze both my breasts, making me both flustered and giggly.

“Okay I gotta get dressed P or we’ll never get out,” I chuckle and grab a pair of white cargos and a black and white striped sweater to put on.

“Fineeeee,” the girl groans and plops herself down onto my bed, still with her eyes closed. Once the clothes are on I walk over to her, standing in between her legs as I lean down and kiss her cheek. Her blue eyes open, sparkling when she sees me.

“You look perfect,” she hums, shoving her hands in my back pockets to feel my ass up.

“Well that dress would’ve been nicer,” I murmur, still a little annoyed. Paige, rolling her eyes, stands up and walks me out the door by my shoulders.

“Well now you won’t be bitchin’ about being cold and shit,” she says.

I had no idea what Paige had planned, but she had been acting all sly about the plans the entire week. It had grown so irritating I almost wanted to tell her off for it, but I knew it was her way of showing she was excited which in turn excited me as well.

The air is surprisingly warm despite the grey overcast caused by the cloudy sky as we head out. Paige opens the door to the passenger seat of her Jeep for me, quickly walking over to the other side and climbing in.

“Sooo where are we going?” I ask, trying to peek into the backseat for any clues. Paige proudly grins as I lean back to find only water bottles, a couple of Nike shoe boxes and a basketball in there. Way to play into every stereotype.

“You’ll see Val,” she beams, her hand coming to rest on my thigh as she accelerates on the highway. “It’s like a little over an hour away.”

Knowing it would be pointless to pry, I stare at the scenery out the car window, enjoying the comfortable silence falling over me and Paige - a rare occasion considering her mouth was always going. I felt at ease, her presence wrapping me in a duvet of calm. Of course my fears were still there when it came to the girl next to me. It would take months of building trust and communication to let go of all that had happened between us. The thing was, we didn’t have months.

In fact a month was all we barely had left before Paige would be leaving for Dallas. Obviously it wasn’t official yet, not till the draft. But we both know what the future holds.

I look at Paige, her side profile outlined beautifully against the light shining in through the window behind her. My eyes roam the tip of her nose, the curve of her lips as she raps along to some song I wasn’t paying attention to. Paige had become a master at the art of evasion, the unmentioned topic heavy between me and her. Mentally I was beginning to prepare for the worst, to face the truth. We could barely stick by each other’s side the past few months and we lived on the same campus - how could we ever make it through long-distance while I finish my masters?

And what then? I pack my shit up and move to Dallas? Would Paige even want me there? She’s gonna meet so many new people, her whole life is about to change. Even if she wanted me now, I’m not so sure she’ll want me a year later. The idea was terrifying, causing a twist in my gut, us finally sorting our shit out just to have to give all this up. So I was just trying to soak in every moment I had with her, even if they were our last ones before the inevitable.

Eventually my eyes land on blue waves stretching across the horizon before us as Paige turns left into a parking lot. I feel excitement growing in my chest for what the girl might’ve planned, pushing away the thoughts of the inevitable end that was looming right in front of us.

“Isn’t it a lil cold for swimming?” I ask confused as Paige parks, my gaze taking in the waves crashing against the sand, only a few others walking along the coastline on the cloudy day. I had always found there to be something extremely serene about a grey day on the beach, the ocean smelled different, the humidity causing the air to grow heavy.

“We’re not going for a swim ma, I’m taking you on a picnic,” she grins and I can tell from the look on her face that she’s proud of this. Paige Bueckers, the All-American basketball star, the one I’d been begging to let me sleep over just a few months ago taking me on a picnic. My heart nearly bursts with affection and I don’t fight the urge to lean over and kiss her. The blonde smiles into the kiss, her lips fitting against mine just right.

As I reach for the door Paige slaps my hand away, the sting making me jump.

“Ow what the hell!”

“Don’t even think about it,” she says as she gets out and walks to the other side to pull the car door open for me.

“Ma’am,” she teases but I look at her, still rubbing my hand.

“That hurt y’know,” I mumble, it didn’t really but something about Paige made me play up my theatrics.

“I did what I had to, now stand the hell up,” she commands pulling me out.

“This isn’t my idea of romantic P,” I complain as she walks me to the trunk of the car by my arm and opens it. I immediately swallow my words when I see what’s inside - a checkered picnic blanket, pillows, a large picnic basket, a cooler and a small speaker.

“This better?” Paige asks, watching my face light up. I would never admit it but part of me thought she could never plan something like this, that it wasn’t her thing. I suppose I was wrong.

“This is the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for me,” I gasp and wrap my arms around her neck and jump, knowing Paige will catch me everytime. She holds me up in the air by my waist and lets me pepper kisses all along her face.

“You deserve it ma, you deserve a whole lot,” she murmurs into my ear before placing me down, hands rubbing up and down my back. “Would give you the whole world if I could.”

Her eyes are blue and sparkling as my gaze meets hers. I wanna pause the moment, stay there with her forever.

“C’mon, let’s go.”

Paige grabs all the heavy stuff insisting I grab the blanket and the pillow instead. Picking the perfect spot we set everything down, the blonde not letting me help the tiniest bit as she sets everything up for us. I inhale the salty air, humming as the scent fills my nostrils. The high-pitched screeches of seagulls echo across the waves and I step out of my shoes, letting the sand against my bare feet ground me.

“Aight, I think we’re set,” Paige says, setting open the picnic basket. Sitting down on the blanket I watch carefully as the blonde pulls out different foods. Chocolate covered strawberries, croissants and pastries - very elegant, very not Paige.

“How did you-?”

“I googled uh, romantic foods… and the girls thought this was a good idea,” she explains sheepishly, handing me a Coke from the cooler. “Is this lame?”

There’s genuine panic on her face and for the first time I notice a slight shake in her hands. Paige Bueckers was nervous. I could barely believe it.

“Paige I love it,” I reassure her but notice the way she’s chewing the insides of her cheeks, tapping her fingers against her Coke can. Without thinking I bring my hand to hers, our eyes meeting. “I mean it. I love this baby.”

She lets out a relieved exhale, a hesitant smile growing on her face. “I did good?”. Looking for praise, as always.

I nod. “Yes, P, you did good,” I grin and lean over to peck her cheek. Smirking, the blonde lifts her arm up to flex.

“Well yeah I knew that,” she rolls her eyes and I scoff when I feel a bead of water drip down my forehead.

Paige feels it too, her blue eyes darting to the sky. The clouds are turning dark above us at a rapid rate, an ominous sign telling us the date might end before it even starts.

“Did you check the weather before P?” I ask as more rain begins to fall down.

“Fuck…” Paige sighs and rubs the bridge of her nose in frustration telling me that she in fact didn’t.

I could tell that she was starting to feel discouraged, it was all a little hard for her - the relationship stuff. For me it was enough that she was trying, but that would never be enough for Paige. Always the winner.

“Maybe it’ll pass… it’s fine!” I assure her and grab a chocolate strawberry, trying to feed it to her. But all of a sudden the soft spring rain turns into a heavy downpour, my hair and clothes getting drenched in a matter of seconds, sticking to my skin. So much for the blowout I spent an hour on this morning.

“Forreal?!” Paige groans, blonde strands darkening from the rain.

“We should probably pack up P…” I carefully tell her, getting up and offering a hand to her. She’s looking defeated and frustrated, staring at the ground. With a heavy sigh she stands up without grabbing my hand, head nodding towards the parking lot.

“No, lemme. You get in the car so you don’t get wet,” she murmurs hopelessly, not meeting my gaze, clenching her hand into a fist.

“No I wanna help-”

“Valerie get in the damn car.”

I knew the blonde well enough to know there was no fighting her once she got like this, so I obey, grabbing the pillows and heading towards the car. I knew exactly what Paige was thinking - that perhaps this was a sign from God of what was to come, that we just weren’t meant to be doing any of this.

Then it hits me - an idea that might save this whole day. I empty the backseat and the trunk completely, placing everything neatly on the front seats (and wondering why she needed 3 basketballs in her car but… sure). After fiddling with the seats in the back I fold them flat, opening up plenty of space in the trunk. Grateful for the hoarding Paige had been practicing, I lay down some towels I found in her car and the slightly damp pillows, setting them up for us.

“Val I told you to get in, you’re gettin’ wet,” Paige lectures as she returns, quickly stopping in her tracks when she sees what I had done.

The back of Paige’s Jeep is laid out flat, the trunk open for a view of the beach stretched out along the horizon. It wasn’t what we had planned for, but I would be damned before I give up on this day.

“C’mon,” I tell the blonde as I climb in, sitting cross-legged as I watch her wordlessly follow. Both of us are soaked, hair dripping water and the fabric of our clothes cold and sticking to our skin. Nevertheless I was hellbent on making this work somehow.

Turning to Paige I smile proudly but she’s frowning, eyes locked on her own lap. She’s upset, not with me but herself.

“I’m so fucking bad at this Val,” she murmurs disappointedly. My heart aches for her, but also for me, terrified knowing the blonde didn’t like to do things she didn’t excel at - this being one of them. Maybe it was only a matter of time when she’d decide to give up on this. On us.

“Paige-”

“And then you fix everything, when I’m supposed to be the one taking you out. Fuck, Val, you should just be with someone who can actually do this shit,” she’s rambling on and I feel that fear growing with each defeated word she says.

“Paige! We’re supposed to be a team, sometimes you drop the ball and I pick it up, so when I drop it, it’s gonna be your turn, ok?” I tell her, my voice steady but stern. She meets my gaze, frowning and shaking her head.

“Ion got time to figure this all out before…” she sighs, a deep furrow in her brows, stopping herself before the painful words slip out. I can feel my heart pounding in my chest.

“Really? Now you wanna have that conversation?” I ask annoyed. She couldn’t just let me fix the date, she just had to start talking about this now. If there was something she really wasn’t the master of it was time and place.

“Well we gotta talk it out at some point ma,” Paige says, her rising voice making me feel defensive.

“Alright so during our first date then? Now?!” I say, closing the picnic basket.

Paige lets out a bitter chuckle, throwing her head back. “This ain’t counting as a date, trust.”

“Why do you have to be like that? I’m tryna fix this and you do that? I don’t need any of this,” I say pointing to the picnic basket and the cooler and the beach. “Just needed you with me and I woulda been happy!”

“Well I figured it wasn’t enough for you before!”

I know exactly what she means. How I wanted her to myself when she had a roster full of girls, how I wanted more. But the way she said it was like I was selfish, like it was too much to want her to myself. Like she didn’t want the same.

It hurts. I go quiet, averting my gaze from her. I feel my eyes burn but don’t let the tears fall. I hear the girl in front of me take a deep sigh, rubbing her jaw.

“Shit… Val, I didn’t mean it like that…” she murmurs but I don’t pay attention.

“We should go back,” I sigh, defeated.

“No no no, baby please, lemme try again plea-”

“I want to go home.” I say sternly and climb out of the trunk. I could feel my heart breaking, now that I got a preview of what was to come once Paige left for Dallas. We would never survive it.

We drive home in silence, but not the easy, comfortable kind. The air inside the car is heavy with things left unsaid. Once we get to Storrs Paige walks me to my dorm, leaning into the door frame as I take off my shoes, eager to get out of the freezing cold clothes, sticking to my skin uncomfortably. The red roses sit pretty in a vase on my nightstand, reminding me of the excitement of earlier and how quickly it had fizzled out. Paige was one of the most resilient people I knew when it came to her sport - however that certainly wasn’t the case in her relationships. It was as if all her fight was reserved for basketball.

“Can I come in for a bit?” She asks carefully.

“I need to get outta these clothes and shower,” I mumble to the blonde. I was hoping she’d fight me, plead to let her in.

She exhales but doesn’t, that quick to give up on us.

“Okay.”

She’s chasing my gaze, but I can’t look at her. Reality was hitting me faster than I’d like and it was so much more painful than all those times Paige went and slept with another girl. Somehow this was way worse. I don’t know how to react without starting to cry - so I don’t react at all.

“Okay.”

Paige sighs and touches my arm just for a second.

“I love you, I’ll text you.”

“Okay P, love you too.”

With that she leaves, no kiss, no hug and she’s gone. Just like she will be in a month or so.

“You’re so stupid Paige,” Jana rolls her eyes and the other girls nod in agreement.

“Forreal you need like dating lessons or sumn,” Aubrey says, manspreading on the couch. I’m lying in the middle of the living room floor, retelling what happened just the other day with me and Valerie.

“I know how to date,” I scoff, throwing my arm over my face.

“No you know how to fuck, there’s a difference,” KK says and the girls hum, nodding their heads.

Azzi walks into the living room, holding a bottle of water, watching all of us gathered around me and my dramatics.

“What’s going on?” She questions, watching me sprawled out on the floor.

“Our BDB here started talking about the Dallas thing in the middle of their first date,” Kaitlyn shakes her head, making Azzi’s eyes widen.

“Girl… you’re an idiot.”

“That’s what I said,” Jana agrees. I groan and rub my face, I suppose they were right.

“That’s what I’m sayin’ tho, I dunno how to be in a relationship so how am I gonna do long-distance with anyone?” I ask, feeling dejected.

Aubrey throws a pillow on me but I was too tired to dodge, letting it land on me. “You’re so stupid.”

“What I’m saying,” Azzi hums, sitting on the edge of the couch. “You’re all about the fight and being resilient. You’ve been through so much shit and pushed through it but some relationship issues and you give up already?”

The words hit hard as I take them in. Because every single word was right. I was a fighter, a demon on the court at my best - so why wasn’t I fighting for me and Valerie.

“You love this girl right?” Aubrey asks, already knowing the answer.

“The most,” I admit, tilting my head to look at her.

“And she’s worth fighting for?”

Fuck yeah she was. More than anyone. I nod.

“Then what’s your problem?” KK asks.

Deep down I knew what my problem was. I was scared. Fucking terrified. I knew if I worked really hard for this and it all went down the drain, it would be the biggest pain of my life. But then again Valerie was worth that risk. I loved her with my whole existence, every cell in me burning for her. Letting her go without a fight might be the only thing that could hurt me more.

“You right,” I murmur and finally get up from the floor, checking the time. Her night shift had just started. “Anyone wanna go to Ted’s?”

The bar is crowded, the end of March bringing students from all over to spend the sunny spring day drinking and dancing. It’s pleasantly busy but not packed to the brim. Everytime I walk into Ted’s I’m brought back to the times I spent sitting in that one table by the corner, drinking Shirleys and watching over Valerie, begging that some sort of miracle would allow her to be mine. The way her mouth twisted into a smile each night I stepped in will forever be engraved in my mind.

To my surprise, I’m met with that same, familiar smile when our eyes meet. I thought she might be upset with me, but the way her perfect face lights up behind the bar makes me feel relieved.

She scurries to me from behind the bar counter, and hugs me tight. Without a care in the world I kiss her, not caring who might see, what the students watching might say behind our backs. Who cares, I’d be leaving in a bit anyway.

Valerie kisses me back, humming into my mouth clearly pleased about my affections. The smell of coconut enamors me, drawing me in.

“I’m so sorry,” I murmur against her in between desperate kisses.

“Forget it, just happy you’re here,” the girl sighs, her kisses filled with a similar urgency. Neither of us wanted to fight, not knowing these were our last moments in Storrs.

Her fingertips press into the back of my head, pulling me in closer when we’re rudely interrupted.

“I love you guys but Riri I need your help,” Natalie laughs, making drinks hurriedly.

We pull apart, her brown eyes twinkling in the low light. “Sorry Nat,” Valerie chuckles, giving me a smile that says everything’s okay. Hesitantly, we let go of each other, the girl returning to her job.

“So I think y’all are good,” KK laughs and the girls join in. I shrug, still feeling the tingle of her kiss on my lips. “Should we go sit?”

“You guys go, I’ll be there in a bit,” I wave the girls off, taking a seat on a stool by the bar. My eyes watch closely as Valerie works, taking in every movement. Her concentrated expression, the slightly clumsy way she handles the bottles because of how small her hands are. It all makes me love her more.

I sit there for 15 minutes, 30 minutes, then an hour has passed but I barely realise, living for the stolen glances and giggles between us. I could watch her forever. For the rest of my life.

“Do you come with the drink?” I overhear some guy, definitely shorter than me and younger, asks Valerie as she’s serving him. Immediately I let out an annoyed scoff, rolling my eyes.

“Unfortunately no,” Valerie chuckles in a friendly manner, fishing for tips. I feel myself growing more irritated, seeing the way this guy is eyeing my girl, the way his eyes lock on her chest in the white top. Now don’t get me wrong, I was the first person to understand why someone would ogle over Valerie - she always looked incredible. The way her work uniform of blue jeans and a white top hugged her body, the slight wave of her hair she hadn’t blow dried, the minimal makeup she wore to work, it all made her look so good I could’ve eaten her alive. But she was my Valerie, mine to look at, to flirt with.

“Damn, what if I tip well,” the guy continues, making me get up from my seat.

“Yoooo chill chill, not too much,” I say with slight irritation, finding to my pleasure that I am in fact taller than the guy as I walk up to him. His eyes flash with recognition as he takes me in, quickly backing down.

“Paige uhh,” he murmurs, lifting his hands up. “My bad, she your girl?”

“She is,” I glance over to Valerie who’s smiling at me.

“And she tips pretty well so…” Valerie adds, making the guy chuckle awkwardly. God I loved her. The guy is quick to back away.

“You can’t work here anymore,” I say jokingly, just meaning it the tiniest bit.

Valerie scoffs, giggling to herself. “Yeah then who’s gonna pay my rent?”

“I’ll pay for everything, I got that NIL deal ma.”

Paige has spent hours sitting on that one stool, shooing off one guy after another trying to hit on me.

“You gotta stop working here,” she repeated to me after the fifth guy had tried to take me home. Thankfully the moment the men saw Paige and realised who she was, they were quick to back off. I didn’t wanna find out what might happen if they didn’t.

“Alright Nat, you gonna be good for the night?” I ask as I take off my nametag, letting my long hair down, feeling it fall down my back.

“All good hun! Go home, have some fun with your lady,” she grins and I chuckle.

“Speaking of, where’s P?”

My eyes roam the crowd, the blonde not hard to find being one of the tallest women here. To my surprise she’s talking to a group of people - and not just any people. My best friends and roommates.

An unease takes over me, knowing that a conflict was likely to erupt unless my roomies could keep their mouths shut. I loved them dearly but once they disliked someone it was impossible to change their minds.

Taking hurried steps, preparing to diffuse the situation, to my surprise, everyone’s laughing, including Paige, telling some sort of story about when KK locked herself out of their dorm.

“What’s going on here?” I chuckle awkwardly, the blonde immediately wrapping her arm tightly around my waist and placing a kiss on the top of my head.

“We were thinking Paige should come to our next dinner party!” Layla says excitedly, clapping her hands together. Monthly dinner parties had become a tradition for us, the first weekend of each month dedicated to spending time together around a shared meal. It had become important, almost sacred. Warmth spreads in my chest thinking about how it was even a consideration to include my girlfriend.

“Ohh P’s gonna be in Tampa,” I realise, leaning my head against her side. “She’s got the final games then.”

“Aww no way,” some of my friends pout to my surprise, genuinely disappointed.

“Then Val can’t come either,” Paige says ruffling my hair. I smooth over it quickly, shooting her a confused look.

“You’re coming to Tampa too, right ma?” She asks.

It’s like my heart skips a beat when her words land. The image flashes in my head, of me getting to watch my girl dominate the court and bring home the Championship if God willing. The thought alone is enough to make me emotional.

There’s a stupid grin on my face when I turn to Paige.

“Are you sure because last time-”

“I was stupid last time, I need you there with me. I’ll sort out the flights and hotels and tickets and everything.”

And hearing her say that means nothing short of everything.

Be You. Be Great.

I repeat the words to myself over and over in my head, a silent prayer. I look at my reflection, the navy Uconn jersey on my body for the very last time. It almost felt too small on me, I knew realistically it wasn’t. But something about it felt like I was close to outgrowing it.

I remember my first game like it was yesterday, the way the jersey felt then, how it swallowed my lanky body. I was just a kid then, not that I felt like an adult now. But I did feel wiser. My arms and shoulders were bigger, filling out the jersey now. I was carrying my name and the number on my back for Uconn for the very last time.

“Paige…” Allie interrupts my thoughts, knocking on the wall next to me. Suddenly I’m back in the dressing rooms, in Tampa, and she’s watching me with a sly smile.

“Sup Allie,” I grin and wrap my arm around my freshie, wanting to savour every second of these last moments I got to spend with the girls as a Husky.

“Come with meeee,” Allie smiles, pushing me towards the cubbies where all the girls are in a half circle, smiling at me. A little creepy, I think to myself as she leaves me to stand in front of the team on my own.

“Uhhh is this when you kill me?” I ask with a grin, causing the girls to erupt into giggles.

“We got you something Paigey,” Ice smiles and walks up to me, handing me a small present, wrapped in purple paper. I feel my chest tightening as I hold the neatly wrapped box in my hands, slowly starting to unwrap it.

“HOLLUP HOLLUP!” KK suddenly interrupts and runs to me holding another present, this one much less neatly wrapped, more of a pile of wrapping paper all taped together.

“It’s from me,” the girl next to me grins.

Ice and Azzi scoff. “Hey we said no present of our own!”

“Well you don’t love P Boogers like I do,” KK sneers and turns to me. “Open mine first!”

“Okayy okay,” I laugh and unwrap the present in my hands, one layer of paper after another.

“Damn did you use a whole roll of paper for this?” I ask, peeling away.

“Be nice or I’m taking it away,” KK scolds, giddy by my side. Finally I reach the last layers, ripping up the paper to reveal… furry purple handcuffs?

Before I can say anything KK has cuffed my left hand to her right one, painfully yanking my arm around as she cheers.

“What the hell???” I yelp, yanking my hand back to my side and looking at the furry cuff tightened around my wrist.

“Now you won’t leave me,” KK hums and wraps her arms around me tight. Everyone bursts into laughter, including me but I hug the girl back - she was like a little sister, this whole team was my family and Storrs was my home. I was already feeling the dread of having to say goodbye itching in the back of my mind.

“Now how we gon explain this to coach?” I chuckle, squeezing KK’s shoulder and dangling our cuffed wrists in the air.

“Guess we just gotta play like this,” she shrugs.

Rolling my eyes I shake my head and look across the room. ��I’m gon miss so many layups today guys.”

Laughs erupt all around the room, except from beside me where KK is looking at me scoldingly.

“Don’ say that,” she argues and starts unlocking the cuffs, unhappy with me.

“I get to keep these tho?” I ask with a grin, my mind already going to filthy images of all the opportunities to use these on Valerie.

“Nasty,” KK mumbles, finally freeing my hand as I grab the cuffs and the key. Returning to the neatly wrapped gift I unwrap one corner at a time, finding a navy blue jewelry case inside. Opening it I gasp, seeing three silver rings lined up in a neat row - each one a letter. BDB.

“Are you forreal,” I chuckle excitedly, my mouth falling open as the girls cheer. I carefully take them out, placing each one on the fingers of my left hand, unable to stop the huge grin on my face.

“Guys…” I pout, already feeling tears forming but Jana is quick to stop me.

“Not yet!”

Suddenly I feel hands wrap around my waist from behind me squeezing tight. I don’t need to turn around to know who it is. I can tell just by the weight of her touch.

“Hey baby,” Valerie murmurs and places a kiss on my shoulder as I turn around. Immediately I wrap my arms around her waist, holding her in the air and letting my nose bury into her hair. I had seen her this morning before getting to the arena, but all day I’d been complaining to the girls about how I wish I could see her just for a second before we start preparing for this game.

Valerie giggles as I spin her, finally placing her on the ground.

“Don’t tell Coach or CD,” Aubrey laughs. “We snuck her in.”

It’s then when I notice Valerie’s outfit. A miniskirt and boots which would have driven me crazy if it wasn’t for what was covering her upper body - A white Uconn jersey, with my name and number on it in big bold letters. Her face is bright, like she’s proud to carry my name on her. Proud to be mine. And it’s at that moment the tears begin to burn in my eyes.

“You’re wearing it,” I say weakly, a single tear rolling down my cheek.

“Baby why are you crying?” Valerie asks, surprised, wrapping her arms around me tight as the girls gush looking at us.

“Remember when we first met and you wouldn’t wear my hoodie?”

“Yes, silly that’s why I’m wearing this. I’m making it up for you,” she giggles and kisses my cheek before pulling away. Her hand however remains around my waist as we both turn to the team, comfortingly rubbing her thumb against my skin. All the anticipation, the nerves and the emotion were overwhelming me, heightening all my senses. I sniffle a little, turning to the girls, my family.

“We love you Paige,” Ice says, her voice shaky with emotion. The girls nod in agreement, many meeting my level of emotion, eyes welling up and lower lips trembling. “You’re not just a part of the team but a coach to all of us.”

“Forreal thank you, for everything,” Jana adds.

“We got it from here P,” Sarah smiles at me and it makes me feel at ease, knowing I did what I could, gave everything I had to them. That I could leave knowing I did my all, gave them all I got.

“Don’t forget us in Dallas tho,” KK says as Valerie rubs my back comfortingly, knowing without words that I needed it before my emotions took over. “Now let’s get this Natty y’all!”

I clap as we huddle up, all my girls around me as we hug and hype each other up, Valerie so short she’s almost getting crushed by Jana and Aubrey jumping up and down next to her. Laughing through the tears I wrap my arm protectively around her and kiss the top of her head, inhaling her scent one more time. I had everything I needed right here to win.

Buzzer.

“And the drought has ended! The National Championship goes to Connecticut for the first time since 2016! Paige Bueckers ends her college career with 27 points in this game, leading the Huskies to a long awaited victory!”

It’s immediate, the joy, the tears. I don’t think I’m completely in my body when me and the girls all crash into poor Geno, hugging him tight, jumping up and down around him. I let my emotions take over, letting the tears run down my cheeks. I look around and see my girls doing the same, letting their tears flow. We fought for this, we earned this. I’m not saying it was late, but it was right on time.

When Coach turns to hug me, there are tears in his eyes too. I knew he wanted this for me as much as I did, but seeing the look on his face makes me feel it even more. After all the adversity, the injuries, the lessons life had thrown in my face - I was finally here. On the other side of it all, victorious. In that moment I realise all the setbacks made this moment a million times sweeter.

“You did it kid, you deserve it,” he says into my ear and it means everything.

We finally break apart from our group hug, my mind immediately going to the one person missing. But before I can even look around, I hear her deafening cheer, her golden brown hair swaying in the air as she jumps up and down, beaming at me.

Before my mind thinks it through I’m running to her, wrapping my arms around her and picking her up, my lips crashing into hers. The audience, the media, our coaching staff might as well not have been there. I didn’t care who saw, or filmed or whatever else. I just won the National Championship and I needed to kiss my girl.

“Paige,” she giggles against my lips but kisses me back, her careful hands wrapping around my neck. I’m sweaty and sticky and my face is wet with tears and this would be all over Tiktok tomorrow but we couldn’t care less.

“I love you,” I gasp as I pull away, shocked to find her brown eyes welling up as she smiles at me.

“I love you so much,” she sniffles as I let her on the ground, her small hands coming to wipe tears off my face. “I’m so fucking proud of you P.”

“I’m so happy you came,” I hum, more happy tears rolling down my cheeks. “I couldn’t have done it without you.”

And it was the truth. All this time I had been so worried about Valerie being a distraction, something that would cause me to fail. But now I realised she was the biggest motivator, my biggest fan. Seeing her looking at me with tears in her eyes, a grin on her face and beaming brightly made me realise winning with my girl by my side felt a million times better. The best prize I could ask for.

“You’re supposed to swipe it,” the girl behind me mumbles, her words a little slurred from the alcohol that had been consumed at the afterparty.

“I know how to open a damn door,” I complain, just as tipsy if not more as I fumble with the card.

“Hurry, P,” she whines, her hands wrapping around me from behind me as she kisses my upper back, making me see stars already.

“That’s really not helpin’ ma,” I groan, finally getting the door open by some miracle, crashing into the hotel room I had booked for Val just a couple blocks away from our hotel. We had stayed at the afterparty as long as we physically could, but all I could think about was having this girl bent over in front of me with those purple cuffs around her wrists ever since I finished my first drink of the night. It didn’t help that she was in the tightest, shortest purple dress for me, my hand itching to make its way beneath the hem.

The second the door closes Valerie’s pushing me against it, kissing my neck heatedly. I let out a moan, my hands flying to her ass, lifting the short hem out of the way. I feel her hot whimper against my skin when I grope her behind, feeling her up hungrily. We’re both starving for each other.

She’s trying to pin me against the door with her smaller frame, and it’s almost pathetic how easily I flip us over, taking charge. Valerie gasps as her back presses against the door and I manoeuvre my thigh in between her legs, pressing against her core harshly as I begin to kiss her, dragging against her clit.

“Fuck me,” she gasps into my mouth like a plea. I pin her against the door, both my big hands on her waist as I grind my thigh into her, already feeling a slight tremble in my legs.

“Oh baby I plan to,” I tell her, kissing along her neck leaving a trail of purple marks. “Got a lotta plans for you.”

“Need more,” the brunette whimpers, the whine in her voice driving me insane. Unable to hold back anymore myself I lift her up by her thighs with ease, throwing her onto the hotel bed.

“Get undressed,” I command, watching the way she’s trying to catch her breath as I shed clothes till I’m in black boxers and a matching sports bra. Putting on a show for me, Valerie slowly shimmies the purple dress off her body, my jaw falling slack to find no bra underneath it. But it’s the crotchless purple panties that make me groan out loud.

“You’re such a slut,” I murmur, watching her laying on her back on the bed and spreading her legs.

“Mmmh you like it,” she giggles. I feel my mouth watering, watching the way her pussy is glistening for me already.

“I do ma,” I murmur, dragging a finger slowly upwards from her ankle, goosebumps following my touch as I reach her knee, her thigh, her inner thigh - just ghosting where she needed me most to bring my fingers splayed on her lower stomach, watching her squirm.

“You wanna be a good girl for me?” I ask, as if I wasn’t about to fuck her no matter the answer. I can feel my boxers growing wetter as her big brown eyes look up at me, needy.

“Whatever you want baby, I’m all yours,” she tells me. The words are music to my ears.

I lick my lips as my fingertip circles her nipple, gently tucking on it to find it quickly getting hard under my touch.

“Shit, stay right there,” I hiss and walk to my bag, pulling out the purple furry handcuffs. Valerie’s eyes widen as she sees them, but the smile on her face tells me she approves.

“You down?” I ask carefully, wanting to make sure. The brunette nods, eyes locked on the cuffs.

I tut at her, my hand grabbing her chin and forcing her gaze on me, dangling the cuffs in front of her like a prize.

“Use your words ma,” I encourage, the blush on Valerie’s face turning deeper, my dominance flustering the girl

“Yes,” she murmurs and I smirk, brushing her now messy hair off her face. She might be feisty, always putting up a fight. But once I got her wet it was so easy to get her to submit, to let me take charge. I loved it.

“There we go,” I praise, swiftly grabbing her wrists and cuffing them to the metal of bed frame, making sure I could celebrate my win without Valerie’s hands getting in the way.

She’s already squirming, too impatient to wait. Shit, so was I. I had been waiting to have my way with her all night.

I walk to the end of the bed, spreading her legs open for me, the view of her cunt in the crotchless panties driving me up the wall. Taking her ankle into my hand I begin to kiss up her leg, slowly making my way upwards to her inner thigh, leaving small marks behind.

“Mmhm, Paige…” she whines.

“Relax, you’ll get it,” I coo, pulling my own boxers down. “But you’re gonna do a lil sumn for me first.”

With that I straddle Valerie’s face, feeling my need dripping down my thighs. I needed her bad, my head spinning and cunt throbbing at this point. She lets out a moan seeing me so close and soaked for her.

“Please baby,” she whimpers, goosebumps everywhere when I feel her hot breath on my core. She’s trying to chase after me, her neck stretching to reach my core.

“Shit, you want it?”

“So bad please,” Valerie whines and I can’t take it anymore.

My hands entangle in her hair as I lower myself onto her, Valerie’s perfect mouth beginning to work immediately.

“Oh shiiiiit ma,” I groan, throwing my head back, her tongue moving back and forth in my folds just the way I liked.

“Taste so good Paige,” she moans against my clit before her plump lips wrap around it and suck, tongue circling in a way that was dizzying. I could feel the way I was getting wetter, the way I was probably making a mess all over Valerie’s face but the way she was lapping me up seemed like she was loving this as much as I was.

“So fucking good, fuck,” I moan, tightening my grip in Valerie’s perfect brown locks and beginning to guide her mouth wherever I wanted. I could feel the muscles in my thighs begin to shake, my free hand grabbing the headboard of the bed as I ride her face.

She’s squirming under me, squeezing her thighs shut to seek any friction at all which only makes me groan louder. My eyes lock onto her face underneath me, scrunched up in pleasure, mouth buried in my cunt, head moving wherever I yanked it.

Needing more, I pull her closer, not entirely sure if she can breathe but when I feel my climax start to build, I decide I don’t care.

“Just like that Valerie,” I praise, my voice and body shaking now as I’m literally grinding myself against her face, my cunt throbbing as I feel myself near the edge. I hear her muffled moans, feel the vibrations against me as my eyes squeeze shut, my orgasm taking over.

“Oh shit, Val,” I groan, pulling her impossibly close. “That’s it, fuck, that’s it.”

The pleasure ripples over me, coming in waves as I come against Valerie’s face, watching the way her pretty hands are grabbing onto the handcuffs decorating her wrists. I grip her hair tight, pulling on it as I moan.

“Damn,” I exhale, my chest heaving as I lift myself off her. Valerie’s face is glistening with my mess, and she’s hungrily licking it off her lips, arching her back, a feeble attempt to tell me one and only thing - she needs to be touched. Bad.

“Now lemme eat this pussy,” I tell her, my mouth already watering as I crawl between her legs, wrapping my arms around her thighs to lift them on my shoulders. And I dive in. I had been waiting all night for this.

A loud moan escapes Valerie’s lips as my tongue works her, slow licks from her entrance to her clit as to clean her up. The taste of her makes me moan out loud, her arousal dripping out of her already, before I had barely touched her.

“This wet already huh? You like watching me play that bad?” I hum against her, watching the way she’s squirming, the way her hands are already tucking at the cuffs - desperate to grab my head and pull me closer.

“Paige, moreeee,” she cries, trying to buck her hips closer but unable to do anything else with the way she was stuck to the bed. Her helplessness only made me wanna drag it out for longer.

“Answer the question,” I demand my tongue now circling her entrance menacingly, licking upwards and repeating.

She huffs and whines frustratedly. “Like watching you win.”

Good answer.

That moment I bury myself into her pussy, beginning to flick my tongue over her clit at an impossible speed, quickly overwhelming her. My eyes squeeze shut as I alternate between sloppy laps on her pussy and precise circles on her clit, Valerie’s thighs quickly closing in on my head as she writhes, handcuffs clanking against the metal of the bed frame. Her moans and the sinful sounds my mouth is making as I eat her fill the hotel room.

“Paige right there oh fuck,” she nearly screams, the alcohol in her system making her more bold. I keep eating her out, tasting every inch of her. Fuck I could never get enough, I was drunk off her pussy. I wanted to be for the rest of my fucking life.

“I gotchu mama,” I moan against her, keeping up my movements until her moans turn high pitched, and I can tell she’s on the edge. Reaching up, I take her nipples in between my fingers, fondling them as I keep moving my tongue back and forth on her clit at a rapid pace.

“Shit, shit shit,” she’s gasping now, back arching high as she releases all over my tongue, making me groan in response. My head is buried in her cunt, coaxing her through the orgasm.

I’m only starting to come down from my orgasm when Paige pulls back and suddenly two of her fingers slide inside me, quickly beginning to pump in and out.

“Wait, no, too much,” I gasp, doing everything I could to pull my hands free but it was no use. Her hand doesn’t slow down despite my whining. A loud moan spills from between my lips, the stretch completely overwhelming my sensitive cunt.

“Need one more from you Val,” Paige praises, watching the way I swallow her fingers up closely. “Gonna feel so good I promise.”

I cry out, my eyes welling with tears at the overwhelming sensation, Paige’s long and nimble fingers curving inwards against my walls, making me even throb around her.

“Ohh shit that’s it,” she gasps, repeating the movement and feeling me throb once more. “Can fucking feel it.”

I squirm, legs shaking and closing around her but she pries them open with ease, the bicep in her right arm flexing as she pumps in faster, the veins of her hands popping more prominently. The wet sounds coming from inside me fill the room - almost embarrassingly loud.

“Too much,” I whine. Without stopping her movements, Paige climbs up to face me from between my legs, grabbing my jaw, licking her lips.

“You said whatever I want before,” she reminds me, her voice stern, demanding. “You’re gon take it ma.”

My eyes flutter shut, the mix of her words and her fingers moving at an overwhelming speed making my mind spin. I keep yanking on the cuffs, not because I think I’ll get free, but because I don’t know what to do with my hands, immense pleasure taking over my body.

“So fucking perfect,” Paige murmurs, still holding my face as she adds a third finger, the stretch now enough to make my whole body tremble. “Could fuck this pussy forever.”

“Open your mouth,” she coos and I do as I’m told, too weak to even think for myself. To think of anything but the way Paige’s fingers are stretching me out, the squelching sound filling my ears as she pounds them into me.

Paige leans down to kiss me, her tongue meeting mine before our lips crash. She still tastes like a mix of me and herself. I keep moaning, my mouth wide open as she kisses around it, cussing to herself.

“Shit, so fucking tight for me huh?”

“Paige,” I plead, unsure of what for when my back arches and I feel my walls tighten, squeezing Paige’s fingers. She feels it too, letting out a groan. My hips are squirming uncontrollably, forcing Paige to pin me back down against the bed, hand pressing hard on my lower stomach as she sits up to finger me even faster.

The pressure on my abdomen and the rapid speed make my eyes roll back, my climax building impossibly strong.

“I’m so close, oh shi-” I’m gasping for air, mind spinning, Paige’s cussing the only anchor to the moment as I throb around her, teetering right on the edge.

“Tell me you’re my girl baby,” Paige moans, making me nod desperately.

“I’m your girl, shit, all yours.”

“That’s right, my good girl.”

With that, the orgasm washes over me, Paige’s fingers pressing against my walls, creating such an intense stretch I swear I’m on the verge of blacking out. My moans are deafening as my back arches uncontrollably, Paige’s other hand remaining on my stomach. The waves of pleasure are incredibly intense as I mewl and release with force, the world going black for a second.

I’m brought back by the blonde’s fingers sliding out, leaving an uncomfortable emptiness within me. I let out a whine, feeling sweat dripping down my neck, the sheets sticking to my skin. I don’t open my eyes until Paige has unlocked the handcuffs, carefully caressing over my wrists and kissing them as she pulls a blanket over me.

“Valerie?”

“Yeah?” I whisper, still attempting to catch my breath.

“You alive mama?” Paige grins as my eyes slowly flutter open, watching her bring me water and a small present wrapped with a blue paper and white ribbon.

“Just about,” I mumble, shimmying up the bed to lean against the pillows behind me. I felt completely fucked out - and surely looked it. Paige certainly did, straight hair that had been down now tangled at the back but her usual braids still perfectly in place, mascara flaking underneath her eyes.

“What’s that?” I ask, eyeing the gift in the blonde’s hand. She chuckles and offers me a bottle of water.

“Drink a lil first, don’t want you to pass out,” she laughs as she climbs over me to the other side of the bed. Deciding she was probably right, I throw my head back and chuck some of the water, feeling the cold liquid make its way down.

“I gotchu a lil something,” Paige starts, handing the present to me. I take it with both hands, eyes flickering between it and the blonde’s bright blue eyes.

“No, I should be the one getting you a gift, you kidding?” I ask, but Paige leans over, her big hand pressing against my cheek as she kisses me.

“I already got my gift,” she murmurs against my lips. Usually I would’ve made a comment about her corny line, but today I couldn’t. I knew exactly what she meant. “Open it.”

Slowly I unwrap the gift, finding a small box inside. I furrow my brows in confusion, but grin.

“Girl you better not be proposing because I think it’s a lil early,” I joke, making Paige let out a heartfelt laugh.

“Just open the damn box,” she complains, watching me closely. I do as I’m told, finding inside a little golden charm. Eyeing it closer, I realise it’s the number 5.

“For your bracelet,” Paige says. I let out a shaky breath, bringing the box closer to my face. It was beautiful, but what it meant was even more important to me. What it might signify.

“Paige…” I sigh contentedly, watching as the blonde with great care holds my wrist and places the charm on the gold bracelet that I wore, each day of my life. Now decorated with a golden 5. My girl’s 5.

Our eyes meet and we wrap our arms around each other, soft kisses between us as we lie down on the bed, Paige pulling me on her chest.

“I love you Valerie,” she hums, fingertips playing with the ends of my brown hair.

“I love you too,” I murmur against her lips, placing soft kisses all over them. Nuzzling my nose, the blonde pulls back. I watch her blue eyes, the way they twinkle in the dim hotel room. My national champion, my winner, my Paige. All mine.

“Come to Dallas with me,” she whispers, a surprising sureness in her voice.

Batting my eyes, I pull back. “What?”

She grabs my hand in hers and kisses my fingers, one by one.

“Don’t make me go without you,” she pleads. “At least come and stay for the summer, and then we can think about what we do.”

“But what about school? I still got a year left P…” I remind her but she shakes her head.

“Just for the summer, and then if you hate it you can come back and I won’t even complain,” the blonde puts her hand up. “Scouts honor.”

Taking it all in, my chest fills with affection. She really wanted me with her.

“You forreal?” I ask carefully, making Paige grin.

“Val, Ion wanna even think about life without you. I can’t be away from you,” she says, pulling me into another kiss. This one is slow, meaningful. Telling me she means every word - and I trust it. I trust her.

“We’re gonna make this work no matter what,” she whispers, nose nuzzling into mine. “Gonna need you there for all my wins.”

I can already see it. Me sitting courtside, watching her win game after game, fulfilling her destiny with me by her side. Having her come home to me, waking up next to her every morning. Perhaps for the rest of my life.

So there’s nothing else I can do but agree. There were no other options I could fathom. I would go to the ends of the earth for her. And it feels incredible to trust - to know - that she would do the same for me. It’s in the twinkle of her eye when she looks at me, the way her hands always find my waist, how her voice lowers and softens when whispering sweet nothings into my ear. I didn’t need words from her. I knew all of it without.

ily guys

taglist: @thaatdigitaldiary @wbbismypassion69 @bueckersfive @onlyhereforpazzi @lovegalor333 @frankoceanlvr303039 @pb524830 @angryflowerwitch@mamixdanni @rosemariiaa @d3arapril @vbueckers @sageworld @makethemhoesmad @sierrale8ne @oreo2sblog @slvt4her @julieloveswbb@vsz333 @faeries-posts @vamptizm @ellapurnellmybeloved @ivorygoal @onlyhereforpazzi@thelightknight21@paigeluvvr@absolutelydreadful@imamartini@lupinqs@authenticgirl03@isurpussygreen@xxloveralways14 @numberonepartyanth3m

#too lost in you #lilas writing #paige bueckers #paige bueckers fic #paige bueckers x oc #paige bueckers x female oc #paige bueckers smut #paige bueckers fanfiction #wnba x oc

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zorostitties · 2 months ago

Text

Aurora; 13

⤕ Your existence had been an endless night, where shadows whispered long forgotten secrets. Trapped in a golden cage, your fragile mind and shattered memories were chains that kept you from dreaming of freedom. Then, he appeared with the first light of dawn, like a gentle sun warming your cold skin. In his gaze, the promise of a new beginning; in his presence, the sunrise your soul had longed for.

In which Alucard saves you from Erzsebet.

pairing: alucard (castlevania) x (f) reader

genre: angst, romance, slow burn, eventual smut

warnings: violence/blood, explicit language, mental health issues, grief, physical abuse.

rating: 18+

word count: 5k

A/N: GUESS WHO'S BACK??? omg y'all. i can't believe it's been over a month since the last update. i had to let this story cool down in my brain before picking it back up. also, just a lot of things happening at the same time in my life. thanks everyone for your patience! as usual, feedback is MUCH appreciated. enjoy <3

⤕ Masterlist ⤕ Also on AO3 ⤕ Playlist

“Don’t scare me!”

??? looks at you with a pout and a deep frown. You roll your eyes and rest your hand on the side of your waist.

“I didn’t do anything.”

“You made that noise to scare me!”

“If you keep complaining, I’ll leave you alone…”

“No!” Her scream echoes from her place at the stairs. “You know I’m scared of the dark!”

You take one more step down and groan in a very annoyed tone. “You could’ve just taken a torch from the patio if you weren’t so lazy.”

“What? You make these light balls all the time. Keep showing them off. What’s different now?”

“The difference, ???, is that your mother asked you to go down the cellar, not me. You dragged me here because you’re a lazy scaredy cat.” ??? takes one more step down. You follow her. “And it’s not a ‘light ball’, it’s a–“

“A sun sphere,” she makes a very whiny impersonation of your voice and shrugs. “Whatever.”

She’s being definitely way too annoying for someone needing help.

The sun sphere floats centimeters away from your palm. It’s not bigger than a pebble, but it’s enough to lighten the entire underground cellar. Eerie shadows are cast over the many barrels and jars that store mostly wine and ale. It always smells of wood, wet soil and grapes down here.

??? squeezes her eyes and walks deeper into the cellar. “Now, which one is it… ???, do you remember–?”

“The big one in the corner. Made of dark oak. Gods, you really know nothing.”

She turns to you with a deeper frown. “And you’re the most annoying person I know! You keep acting like that just because you can make your stupid balls of light or because you turned twelve first! No one besides you cares! Everyone says I’m cuter than you anyway!”

Your jaw drops. You tilt your head to the side. “Well, I think you care. At least I’m useful for something. All you do is braid your hair and destroy Aunt ???’s tapestries with your ugly paintings.”

??? gags; her face is now completely clouded with anger. She puts the ceramic jar she held previously on the floor and walks towards you at heavy steps, her hands tightened into fists.

“Take that back!”

Oh, that was such a grave mistake.

??? has time to see your face turn into a mischievous grin before she regrets what she was about to do.

“No–“

Too late.

You summon the sun sphere to your palm and close your hand.

The light extinguishes.

??? yells.

You run upstairs much faster than her – you were closer to the stairs since the beginning – with ??? following you shortly while screaming like a scared mouse. But you get to the top faster. You shut the door with a loud bang. You lock the heavy wooden door and lean your back on it.

You laugh while she bangs on the door, screaming and crying, until you spot Aunt ??? going down the patio to see what is happening.

You run away before she can scold you.

Juste and Alucard gathered in front of Ruby to analyze the speck of light she had just summoned.

The old Belmont hummed and held his chin, leaning down slightly to see it closer. The only way to describe what he was seeing was as a ball of light. It floated a few centimeters away from her palm obediently.

Juste stuck his finger into the ball and hummed again. It didn’t move away from his touch; his pointer finger went through it as if it weren’t even there.

“It’s not fire,” he observed with a thoughtful tone. “It even feels a little cold.”

Alucard watched him intently.

“Does it feel like Speaker magic?” the white-haired vampire asked.

“No, no. It definitely isn’t.” Juste straightened his back and rested a hand on the side of his waist. “Never seen a Speaker summon light like that.” His frown deepened. “Though it’s not really light. It’s sun, isn’t it?”

Ruby looked down at the light orb and pressed her lips.

“It’s called a sun sphere. I… think.” Her words were slow, hesitant.

“And how did you figure out you could make it?” Alucard asked.

Ruby gulped. She looked a little dazed… Juste figured she was the most shocked out of everyone at this new discovery. It was as if she didn’t even know what to do with herself.

“I had a dream. When I woke up, I just… could do it.”

“How are you summoning it?” It was Juste’s turn to ask.

“I don’t know. It’s second nature. It’s like… it’s like asking me how do I raise my arm or how do I see with my eyes.” Ruby moved her hand slightly; the sphere grew a bit larger, floating farther from her palm. “It feels as if there is a room in my mind I was not aware of. It was… locked. Hidden. Now, the door is opened and I can walk in. It was always there, I just didn’t see it.”

Juste sighed and closed his eyes for a moment.

“...Yeah, I can relate to that.”

She summoned the sphere back into her palm; when she closed her hand, the sphere vanished.

Alucard crossed his arms. “So Annette was right all along. You are a witch. Your powers were just locked.”

Ruby looked down. “I’m not sure about that.” She confessed. “I also don’t know how useful this magic is other than just creating light.”

Juste chuckled dryly. “Well. It did obliterate half an army of vampires. It’d call it more than useful.”

“But that was the scepter… wasn’t it?” She definitely didn’t sound too sure of herself.

Juste wasn’t sure about that, either. He knew the scepter had some sort of magic stored in it… but what if it was just and instrument for her power, not the source of it to create such an intense spell?

The Belmont was about to make more questions – her magic was intriguing; he didn’t like the fact that he didn’t know what he was dealing with… and the thing about Belmonts is that they usually knew what the hell they were dealing with.

But he looked down at Ruby and noticed how she looked nauseous.

Alucard acted before he could.

The white-haired vampire rested his hand over her shoulder. “We should depart tomorrow morning,” he said in a calming tone. “Why don’t you get inside and have your things ready for the travel?”

Ruby looked surprised at first, then something like relief covered her features. She nodded and stepped back.

“You’re right. I’ll… see what I can do.”

She waved a small goodbye towards Juste and rushed to get into the house.

The old man sighed and crossed his arms. “Poor girl. I can’t even imagine what she’s going through.”

Alucard just looked down in response.

Paris was still noisy with repairs happening everywhere – even noisier than usual. The party last night lifted their spirits, but now it was time for the Parisians to face reality: hundreds of dead. Countless buildings destroyed. A monarchy yet to be crushed… there was much to be done.

But strangely enough, Juste felt… excited.

...Renewed? Joyful? Perhaps all of these things at once. It felt as if the veil that covered his eyes and the weight heavy on his shoulders had lifted. He felt that… maybe, Juste had found a purpose again. One that went beyond survival or killing some vampires for a few coins.

One more noble, perhaps. The one that kept the Belmont clan alive for centuries.

Talking about something being alive for centuries – Juste looked at Alucard with a quirked eyebrow.

“‘Departing tomorrow morning?’ May I ask where you’re going next?”

Alucard’s expression softened slightly, the knot between his eyebrows untied. Of course Juste was curious. He couldn’t deny that the mystique (for lack of a better word) that revolved around Alucard intrigued him. Juste spent his childhood hearing stories about the man from his father, even though the half-vampire barely spent any time with him back then.

Which was even more intriguing, in a way. Because Alucard hadn’t changed a day since Juste was fourteen. Same appearance, same voice, same… everything. It was a bit eerie how this man that looked to be around his late twenties was actually lifetimes older than him… and it was a bit eerie how this young looking man could make Juste feel like a child.

Not intentionally or in a belittling way. But Juste knew what that look meant, the slight curve up of his lips. The barely there excitement and endearment, maybe.

“We’re going to Wallachia. To the Castle… and the Belmont Hold.” There it was. Alucard knew Juste would gasp, that his eyes would widen ever so slightly. “You’ve never been there, have you?”

Indeed. Juste didn’t know exactly why his ancestors left Wallachia or why they decided to spread around Europe. He thought it wasn’t a great idea judging by how little of them still remained. Perhaps staying in the Hold would’ve been the smarter decision. But Juste wasn’t there at the time… he couldn’t judge.

Every Belmont knew about the Hold and the centuries of information, history and magic stored there. Every Belmont knew that Alucard was the official guardian of the place…

“You’re more than welcome to join us.” The vampire continued. “Richter, too, if he wishes so.”

...And it would be a lie if Juste said this invite didn’t make his heart race.

Juste was a Belmont, but he was far from knowing the glory days of his clan. He’d like to know what remained of it, how magnificent the Hold must truly be. If he said he didn’t plan this trip many times, he’d be lying. But life always had a way to drift him apart from it over and over again – because of Lydie, then because of Julia… and then, because of his inertia that lasted years.

He didn’t have any of that anymore.

And yet – once again, Juste couldn’t go.

The old man sighed and crossed his arms. “I’m honored for the invite… but I’ll have to decline. Richter decided to leave for Saint Domingue with Annette… and I just can’t leave Maria alone. At least, not now. She needs someone.”

Juste knew this better than anybody. He’d seen it up close for the past few days – her fight against the darkness within herself, the loss of her mother… the way he failed in stopping her from killing the Abbot. Juste knew she hadn’t healed from any of that yet. Maria needed guidance. Not only because she was just a child in a cruel world – Maria was a powerful magician, perhaps more powerful than anyone first assumed.

And Juste had seen that darkness in her.

That linked with magic could become a catastrophe.

Richter still hadn’t told her was leaving… Juste feared what her reaction would be. So he needed to make sure she wouldn’t feel alone. Even though, well, he wasn’t great with teenage girls.

He’d have to overcome that.

Was he doing it for Maria, for Tera, for himself or for Julia?

Did he see Julia in that short blonde girl?

Maybe.

Juste just knew he didn’t want to fail in protecting someone this time.

Alucard shrugged slightly. “The place is part yours by right anyway. You can come whenever you want.”

Juste smiled and nodded. He then quirked one eyebrow again. Talking about feeling responsible over someone…

“You took full responsibility over Ruby, huh?”

The faint smile immediately vanished from Alucard’s lips. He looked down, the knot between his brows appeared again.

“...This isn’t completely over, Juste.” His voice was quieter, as if afraid any passersby could eavesdrop. Somber. “You saw it, too. The shadow.”

Juste felt a shiver just remembering it.

He was barely awake at the time, recovering from the heavy blow Erzsebet had landed on him and Maria. He was dizzy, confused, feeling pain everywhere… but he saw it. The whirlpool of shadows surrounding Drolta’s beheaded body. The laughing thing that emerged from it.

The demon.

“That thing appeared for the Abbot, too, when he died.” Juste lowered his voice as well, caressing his beard absently. “It came to reap him.”

“He probably had a deal with this demon… and he died before accomplishing it.”

“Which means Drolta had a deal with it, too?” Juste completed his logic. “Why would a vampire so powerful fall for that?”

Alucard tilted his head to the side. Juste could almost see the gears in his mind turning relentlessly, trying to come up with new answers.

“I can’t be sure. But… they had an immortal whose blood miraculously heals in their possession for a long time.” The vampire looked at him. “This feels like something worth making a deal for. No?”

Juste widened his eyes slowly.

...That made sense. Yes, that made a lot of sense.

“Do you think she was the bargaining chip?”

Alucard shrugged. “Erzsebet drank Sekhmet’s blood to become the goddess’ vessel… and Ruby’s blood to heal herself from the process. Drolta searched for a suitable vessel for millennia. Maybe she didn’t find one. Maybe she made one that couldn’t die this time… because she had a way to heal her continuously.” Alucard held his chin in a thoughtful expression. “And it’s not only that… right after Annette managed to rip Sekhmet’s soul from Drolta’s body, Drolta tried to reach for Ruby. I’m sure she did. Why would she do something like that on the verge of death?”

“Maybe to heal herself with Ruby’s blood.” Juste guessed. “Or maybe… because she was part of the deal.”

“And Drolta knew she had to do something about Ruby to complete her part of the deal before she could be reaped.”

It’s like Juste could visualize an intricate thread form in front of his eyes as Alucard spoke. The old Belmont tapped his foot on the cobblestones floor, hummed deep in thought.

“The fact that after Drolta died, Ruby remembered how to access her magic… a non-Speaker magic that I’ve never heard of on top of that makes everything more suspicious.”

“Yes.” Alucard nodded. “I believe all the answers are with her already. We just have to find a way to open the doors to her mind. My father’s knowledge might be helpful with that.”

“Let’s be glad that Ruby is cooperative, then.”

“She wants to remember her past more than all of us.”

Juste tilted his head. “Understandable. I can’t even begin to imagine what it must feel like… to have no memories at all.” He hesitated a few seconds before speaking again. “Which… might lead to some uncomfortable discoveries, aye? Maybe she became a part of all this willingly.”

“I doubt it. She also wanted Erzsebet and Drolta dead more than all of us.” Alucard looked down again. “But if it turns out to be true… I’ll deal with it.”

Juste eyed Alucard in silence for a while.

Could he, really?

Of course – he didn’t want to question legendary Alucard. This man had killed more vampires and fought more magicians than Juste could even count. But Juste also saw that the vampire was… attached to her to some degree. He just wasn’t sure how deep this attachment was. Would Alucard be able to deal with her if he found out she wasn’t innocent?

Because dealing with it meant to kill her.

But… well… considering what he had already done in the past…

Juste didn’t even want to think about it.

“If it comes down to this… how are you going to do it?” The Belmont was, once again, hesitant, choosing his words carefully. “From what I’ve heard, she’s like a vampire. Does she die like a vampire, too?”

Alucard tightened his eyes slowly.

“I’ve seen a night creature bite half of her body. Multiple organs pierced. Bones crushed to dust. Mass bleeding. She healed in an hour and half.” The vampire looked down at Juste, maybe to observe his astonishment. “I don’t know many vampires who could survive all that.”

Juste went silent for a while.

That… that sounded dangerously close to something mankind had been looking for since the dawn of time. What vampires wanted the most. They called themselves immortals, but they could be killed. And yet…

“That sounds like true immortality.”

Alucard nodded slowly in a grave movement.

Juste felt his stomach get heavy.

He shook his head. “But that can’t be. Anything can be killed. We just don’t know how yet… in her case.”

Alucard looked down again. There was something very dark in his eyes… very cold.

“Perhaps the only person that knew how to is already dead.”

It took Juste a few seconds to understand what he meant… could it be… Drolta…?

But he saw someone else approaching – and the topic ended right then.

It was the ginger boy, Henri, son of the Judge.

It was a bit funny how awkwardly he walked. The young lad always looked like a pile of nervousness – blushing, blinking, averting his gaze elsewhere… so much that Juste wondered how the hell did he survive past night. How was he even a soldier?

“Did you call me, Mr. Alucard?” The boy asked. He hardly could keep eye contact with neither of them.

“Yes.” The vampire crossed his arms. He narrowed his eyes at Henri; Juste could almost see the boy shrinking under his gaze, though Alucard didn’t sound much different from how he usually talked. “Did you tell anyone about what happened yesterday?”

The younger one widened his eyes slightly. He unconsciously gripped his recently healed shoulder. “N-No, sir.”

“This information could put her in great danger.” Alucard stepped closer and lowered his voice. “The only people that know about Ruby’s ability are me, Juste and you. So, if anyone comes after her… I’ll know it was you.”

Henri got pale.

It seems that even his lips lost their color.

It was a bit impressive how Alucard could threaten in such a sophisticated way. Henri looked between the vampire and the Belmont, both much taller and muscular than him – and Juste wondered for a second if he’d piss his pants.

“O-Of course, Mr. Alucard. I’d n-never put Miss Ruby in danger. This secret goes with me to the grave.”

Alucard nodded approvingly.

He then looked at Juste. “If you’ll excuse me, I have some preparations to make as well.”

The vampire took two steps.

Juste watched Henri intently. In the time Alucard took these two steps, it looked like there was a war happening inside the boy. Finally, before Alucard could leave–

“Wait!”

He turned around and looked down at Henri. The quirk of his brow was enough of a question.

Before, Henri got pale. Now, he got as red as a lobster.

The boy avoided his gaze and bowed slightly.

“I-I’d like to properly apologize, Mr. Alucard. For c-c-courting Miss Ruby. I… I didn’t know she was is your fiancée.”

It was a difficult task to take Alucard off guard – but Henri’s “apology” certainly did.

Juste looked from the tall one to the small one repeatedly. What is going on here?!

Henri coughed. “I-I did not mean any disrespect on you, sir. Or on Miss Ruby. Please, forgive me.”

There were a few seconds of silence.

Juste tried to muffle an incoming giggle. So the boy thought they’re a couple?

The tension disappeared from Alucard’s face once more. He chuckled lightly and closed his eyes for a moment, looking like he found the situation extremely funny.

He patted Henri’s shoulder softly.

And walked away.

Not a word spoken.

Now Juste was caught off guard.

He watched Alucard’s back as he distanced himself, suddenly remembering what he said yesterday night when Maria asked him what he was going to do from now on.

“I’ve been alone for many years. It seemed, on the whole, for the best. But last night, I saw people who have found something… new and precious and… maybe world-changing. They were not ready to surrender it. They would rather die. I think I’d like to see how that goes.”

And Juste got it.

The old Belmont chuckled and patted Henri’s back. The boy gasped in surprise.

“You aimed too high, lad.” Henri looked down with blush already covering his cheeks and ears. “But don’t be discouraged. Paris is full of beauties.”

He walked away too before Henri could feel even more embarrassed.

Apparently… Juste wasn’t the only one with a new motivation to live.

You should be packing.

Well. Not that you had anything to pack. The maid had kindly brought a few pieces of clothing and a bag, so it was pretty much everything you’d be able to carry with yourself – but all of these items were still scattered over the bed, untouched.

All you could do was sit on the edge of the bed and stare at the sun sphere.

Sun sphere. It’s how that little girl in the dream called.

As soon as your eyes snapped open, you just knew how to do it. It was easy, didn’t make you feel tired. Almost as it you’d known how to do that your entire life.

It was the second time in 48 hours that a dream revealed something about yourself.

You remembered how, under imprisonment, you barely ever dreamed of anything – and now suddenly whenever you closed your eyes, your mind wandered. What if that was also Erzsebet and Drolta’s work? What if Alucard was right and your memory was blocked by magic?

Maybe these weren’t dreams. Maybe these were memories.

You closed your hand, making the sun sphere vanish. So you were in fact a magician, as Annette suspected from the start… though Juste stated this wasn’t Speaker magic. Alucard had no idea of what it was either. When it came to you, it seems no one had any idea of anything ever. Which, quite honestly, was starting to be annoying. Of course – no one had to know anything, but the sheer lack of information was just infuriating.

Alucard was confident you’d find valuable information in his castle, however.

Dracula’s Castle.

It felt a bit strange how Alucard didn’t call the place his. His father could’ve built it, but as far as you knew, it had been his for hundreds of years already. Why, then, didn’t he feel like he owned it?

The idea of being there was both exciting and frightening. Dracula built the castle. He lived there. And for some reason, the mere mention of his name already brought chills. You should’ve already mentioned this strange reaction to Alucard at this point, though you still didn’t quite know how to approach the topic… but it had to be done, right? And soon. You couldn’t run away from it much longer.

What was also exciting and frightening was the idea that you’d travel with Alucard.

Alone.

You weren’t scared of him; not at all. But… Annette and Richter wouldn’t be there to divert his attention. It’d be just you and him the entire travel.

You didn’t know if you could manage your embarrassment around him.

Why were you even embarrassed in the first place? You didn’t know exactly. Maybe the fact that you were so attached to him already. That… didn’t feel very mature of you. And Alucard was so mature.

There was no way you wouldn’t be attached to him when you knew so little about the world. But… how did he feel about all this? What if you were being inconvenient in some way?

You shook your head as if to make these thoughts fly away.

“Pack. I should pack.” You mumbled under your breath before finally getting up.

Two changes of clothes, one of which you’d obviously be wearing. A black cloak. You folded everything carefully and put it inside the brown leather bag the maid provided. And finally… something else you felt brave enough to ask for.

A small notebook.

The cover was made of black leather with a thin strip to keep it closed. It was a little bigger than your hand. With care, you took the lily that the three little boys had given you and placed it inside the notebook to let it dry there.

You’d just written a few things yet. A couple of phrases. You found yourself embarrassed of writing anything remotely personal, even if you were locked inside a bedroom. Probably because you were still under the panic of being watched at all times.

But you were scared of forgetting the frail memories you had retrieved… or even the events that unfolded in the past week.

You hadn’t experienced any memory blackouts since you left imprisonment. You woke up exactly were you laid previously; you didn’t suddenly find yourself in situations and didn’t remember how they started. But there was no solid proof that it couldn’t happen again. What if you had to use the scepter again and it melted your brain? What if it caused memory loss? What if there was actually something wrong with your head that had nothing to do with magic?

So you decided to keep track of yourself in this small notebook.

You still had to find the right words. It was… difficult to organize your thoughts in text. Your handwriting wasn’t the best, either. But you had to try, regardless of how awkward it’d feel at first.

You felt the presence before you saw him.

Something cold. For a second, you thought it was a freezing breeze coming from the open window… but no. Something in your guts knew better. Was familiar with it. The sense of danger they brought, the darkness and the cold.

The presence of a vampire.

You turned around in a jump.

You thought your eyes were failing you at first. It… looked like smoke. Pitch black smoke materializing in the room, condensing at the darkest part of it, were the thick curtains were still covering the window.

That pitch black smoke took the form of a man.

Your first reaction was to grab the sun disk. Your heart raced, adrenaline heightened your senses to a ten. The door was quite far… if he launched himself at you, would you make it to the doorknob in time?

But then… you looked at him.

Really looked at him.

The unknown man was tall and muscular. He wore a luxurious purple and golden attire. His long straight black hair fell to the right side of his face. His eyes… vertical pupils and an eerie, supernatural shade of green, contrasting with his brown skin. They seemed to glow in the dark. Astute eyes. Almost as if you stood in front of a serpent quietly analyzing its prey. His beauty was mesmerizing.

And you remembered.

“...I know you.” Your voice was quiet. “You were at the Erzsebet’s chateau that morning.”

The vampire opened an almost imperceptible smirk.

“I’m surprised you remember.” His voice was also quiet; smooth as silk, with a bit of rasp on it.

“Are you one of her servants? Do you seek revenge?”

He shook his head slightly. His earrings tinkled with the movement.

“Oh, no. I’m more than pleased that the bitch is dead now.” His gaze was so penetrating that you felt your stomach drop. He measured you up and down slowly. “But… I’m curious about you.”

You still moved slowly, as if you were indeed facing a poisonous serpent. Alucard didn’t feel this man’s presence in the house… meaning he was certainly skilled in masking his presence. That was no regular vampire. In a way, he exhaled that same quiet aura of an old, powerful vampire that Alucard had as well.

He didn’t show any aggressiveness in his expression or body.

Which made you remember something else.

The day Alucard took you from the chateau… the words he said.

Now, let’s go. I’m already abusing the opportunity my associate gave me…

This man was there to see you help summon the eclipse.

“...Was it you?” He waited for you to elaborate. “It’s you who told Alucard about me?”

He closed his eyes for a moment and tilted his head… almost a nod.

You straightened your back and lowered your arm slowly.

“...Thank you, sir. You saved my life.”

He seemed a bit taken aback by your sudden change in behavior.

“Nothing to thank me for. I was chasing after my own interests.”

“If your interest was to defeat Erzsebet, than I should thank you even more.”

He chuckled dryly. “You’re not what I was expecting. But… it makes sense, in the end.”

“What are you talking about?” You frowned.

“I wanted to see the person Mizrak risked his life for up close.” His eyes dropped to the sun disk in your hand. “So… it was really you.”

His last sentence went completely unnoticed. Your eyes widened.

“Mizrak?! Do you know Mizrak?” You took one step closer to him. “Is he alive? Is he okay?!”

The scene of Mizrak being stabbed in the stomach didn’t leave your mind. The amount of blood that flowed from the wound, the way he pushed you inside the cathedral… and how he simply disappeared after everything. Both Alucard and Juste tried to find him, asking in several medical posts (the improvised spots where the wounded in battle were being treated) if they’d seen him, but no one received a man with the same description.

You wouldn’t have reached Notre Dame without him. The idea that he could’ve simply died was agonizing.

The vampire quirked an eyebrow softly at your inquires. “...He’s still not well. But he’ll be.”

A side of you was immediately worried for Mizrak’s life. After all… this man could’ve helped you, but he still was a vampire – and you didn’t trust vampires. But there was something in the way his serpent eyes softened almost imperceptibly at the mention of Mizrak that made you… calm down about his safety.

You tightened your eyes at him.

“What’s your curiosity about me?”

The vampire watched you in silence for some seconds.

It was unsettling how you had no clue of what was going through his mind. The ghost of a smirk stayed there… almost in a mocking way. You wondered it you really should stop worrying. You wondered if it wouldn’t be a good idea to reach for the doorknob and scream…

But his eyes dropped from your face.

They lingered somewhere lower.

Your chest. The left side of it.

And… and it seemed he was seeing something you couldn’t. Something that made his vertical pupils dilate slightly.

Finally he looked at your face again.

Opened a lip tightened smile.

“Don’t bother, my dear. I already found out.” You watched as his body started to dissipate again in a shapeless black cloud. “Farewell.”

And just like that – he was gone.

You hadn’t realized you weren’t breathing properly.

You turned around and opened the door in a rush. What the hell just happened?! Who was that man? What did he mean? What if he was dangerous? What if he was still around? Why didn’t anyone else feel his presence?! You ran down the corridor, feeling adrenaline kick in again. The stranger saved your life… and didn’t seem aggressive. But that could mean nothing.

Alucard’s room was the last. The door was partially opened, so you just stormed in–

And froze.

Alucard was in the room.

...Laying on the sofa. Asleep.

His chest moved slowly. He was too tall for it… so one of his legs was over the sofa arm, while his other feet touched the floor. His neck was in an uncomfortable position. By the way his sword was leaning on the sofa and he had a small book over his chest… he didn’t plan to sleep there.

Your entire will to warn him ended right then.

From the moment you met him… the travel from Machecoul to Juste’s cottage, then all the way down the river towards Paris… Alucard didn’t sleep once. Richter and Annette took turns on who got to sleep. You even managed to sleep some hours at the atelier.

Alucard didn’t.

He’d been awake for days straight.

How could you simply wake him up now that he finally relaxed, even if by accident?

You stood by the door for some seconds. His long wavy hair fell over his shoulders and the sofa arm like a cascade of threads made with moonlight itself. You’d never seen him so… tranquil. No knot between his brows, lips completely relaxed. It made him look younger, in a way.

Slowly, you stepped back and closed the door, afraid to make any noise.

That could wait.

A/N: SO!! after over a month i know yall were expecting dracula's castle already or hot steamy sex!! BUT!! this is a transition chapter and it had to happen before we get to the next part!! it'll all be worth it later TRUST 🙏 what i will tell you is that one of the reasons why this ch took so long is that i REALLY wanted to write what comes next, but this one had to come first. and it kinda pissed me off, so instead of, you know, getting this over with, i just laid in bed and fantasized about the parts i ACTUALLY wanted to write. which means i am motivated to write again bc i'm getting to the parts i wanted. i don't even know if what i just said makes sense lmao but ANYWAYS!! trust the process!! 🙏

#alucard x reader #castlevania #alucard #adrian tepes x reader #adrian fahrenheit tepes #castlevania netflix #castlevania nocturne #alucard x you #castlevania x reader #alucard castlevania

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adelliet · 3 months ago

Text

Joel Miller x f!reader

MISS MY EX

Summary: It’s been a while since you and Joel were together, and you don’t even live in Jackson anymore. He’s fine with it—or at least, he thought he was. That is, until you come back with a ring on your finger, reminding him that he’s not as okay as he claimed to be.

Warnings: 18+ MDNI, strong language, engagement, jealousy, cheating (come on, you saw it coming), unprotected sex, nicknames, mention of masturbation, obsession (not in a creepy way), corn with a plot

A/n: Hi! So, this is once again ridiculously long (I am giving up fr). Anyway if you have any ideas, suggestions, or anything else, feel free to text me. Also, I apologize for any grammar mistakes or phrases that might not make sense—English isn’t my first language :3 But I hope you enjoy the story! <3

Masterlist

“Come on, Joel, give me a hand with this,” Tommy groaned, his arms trembling under the weight of a heavy crate of beer.

Joel exhaled sharply, stepping forward and lifting the box with ease. He barely even had to try. Tommy just shot him an unimpressed look as they made their way toward the bar.

“Alright, are you finally gonna tell me what the hell is going on?” Joel asked, narrowing his eyes at Tommy, who seemed unusually focused.

Tommy hesitated for a second before simply saying, “Someone’s arriving.

Joel let out a frustrated sigh. He was really starting to lose patience. “Yeah, you already told me that. But who the hell is coming?!”

He pushed the door to the bar open with his shoulder, expecting an answer, but Tommy completely ignored him. Instead, he strolled past him, heading straight for the bartender and striking up a conversation like nothing had happened.

Joel clenched his jaw, his irritation simmering just beneath the surface. Fine. His gaze swept across the bar, and that’s when he noticed it.

The walls were decorated with 'Welcome Back' signs, their bold, hand-painted letters standing out against the rustic wood. Ribbons were wrapped around the chairs, the kind of detail that felt too thoughtful for just anyone. A few tables had been rearranged, pushed together to accommodate a larger group. Someone had even gone through the trouble of lighting candles, their soft flickering glow casting warm shadows across the room.

Whoever was coming back…they weren’t just passing through. They were someone important. And Joel didn’t know why, but something about it made his stomach tighten.

“Where do you want this?” Joel asked once he finally took in all the decorations.

Tommy barely spared him a glance before gesturing toward the floor beside the bar, too preoccupied with whatever he was doing to give a proper response.

Joel set the crate down with a quiet grunt before straightening up, his gaze flicking back to Tommy. “You still don’t wanna tell me who’s coming?” His voice was calm, laced with mild curiosity. And why wouldn’t he be curious? Anyone would be, considering how much effort had gone into this setup.

Tommy finally paused his conversation with the bartender, turning back to Joel with a grin, one that was just a little too smug. “You’ll find out soon enough,” he said, patting Joel’s shoulder in a deliberately teasing way before disappearing.

Joel’s jaw clenched as he watched Tommy slip through the storage room doors, leaving him standing there with nothing but more unanswered questions.

Whatever. If Tommy didn’t want to tell him, then Joel didn’t need to know. Even though his curiosity was eating away at him, he didn’t need to know. He didn’t.

Joel sank onto a barstool, his gaze settling on the bartender as he tried to read him, see if he knew anything. The man wiped a glass with a rag, not even glancing at Joel. Yeah, he knew something. Or at least, he knew more than Joel did.

Letting out a slow breath, Joel shifted his attention toward the front doors, watching every person who walked in, analyzing them. None of them seemed out of the ordinary. None of them explained why the place was decked out like it was waiting for royalty.

Then, suddenly, Tommy shot out of the storage room like a damn bullet, walking briskly through the bar before heading straight outside. Joel just watched him go, amusement twitching at the corner of his lips. He hadn’t seen Tommy this stressed in a long time.

As time passed, more and more people gathered in the bar. Joel would even go as far as to say that half of Jackson must have been crammed inside. The place was packed, people chatting, some holding drinks, others nibbling on snacks.

Joel had nothing.

He hadn’t moved from his seat, hadn’t ordered a drink, hadn’t even considered eating. He just sat there, gaze locked on the front doors, curiosity simmering beneath his otherwise calm demeanor.

Then, just like that, Tommy burst back inside, breathless and sweaty, his hair damp like he’d just sprinted a damn marathon.

“She’s here.”

The words tumbled from Tommy’s mouth in a pant, loud enough to catch the room’s attention. A murmur spread through the crowd, voices overlapping as people turned to one another, sharing glances and hushed conversations.

Joel still had no fucking clue who the hell was arriving. All he knew now was that it was a she. Like that helped him figure out anything.

Tommy plopped down next to Joel at the bar, still trying to catch his breath. In the meantime, he ordered two whiskeys, showing two fingers to the bartender.

Joel raised an eyebrow, eyeing the two drinks before glancing back at Tommy. “Two whiskeys? You planning on getting double drunk or just trying to drown whatever’s bothering you faster?”

Tommy chuckled, shaking his head. He didn’t even flinch at Joel’s jab, just gave him a knowing look. “Trust me, you’re gonna need this,” he said, his voice low, almost like he was trying to prepare Joel for whatever was about to happen.

Tommy grabbed both glasses of golden liquid, handing one to Joel and taking a sip from the other. His face was a mix of provocation, impatience, and curiosity, as if he was silently daring Joel to react.

Joel hesitated for a moment, eyeing the glass in his hand before glancing up at Tommy. His brow furrowed in confusion, but before he could say anything, the sound of the main doors swinging open cut through the air.

Everyone in the bar fell silent for a moment, their heads turning toward the entrance. And in that brief, tense silence, Joel’s heart skipped a beat, the mystery finally about to unravel.

Then you appeared in the doorway.

Oh, so that was the reason Tommy hadn’t told him. That was why actually no one had said anything. His ex had come back. What an event this is.

When Joel saw you, his heart shattered into pieces and sank deep within him. He froze in place, the noise around him fading into nothing as he focused solely on you. The anxious feeling inside him grew stronger with every passing second that his eyes stayed on you.

It had been half a year since you broke up. Joel had taken it in stride, acting like everything was fine. He’d been normal, never overreacting whenever your name came up in conversation. He didn’t dwell on it, didn’t let it affect him, at least, not when he wasn’t alone. But now, seeing you, it was like you triggered every single feeling he had buried. The sadness, the sense of loss, the anxiety, it hit him all at once.

He was fucked.

You looked so happy. Your laughter filled the air, a genuine smile that stretched from ear to ear, and you waved at everyone around you, completely at ease. Joel couldn’t help but pause for a moment, watching you, as his heart skipped a beat.

He had forgotten just how beautiful you were. The way your hair shimmered in the light, each strand looking soft and healthy, like it belonged in a shampoo commercial. The way your eyes sparkled with mischief, always so full of life. Your skin, smooth and glowing, like you had been kissed by the sun itself.

And then there was the scent. The fresh, citrusy aroma that always lingered around you. It was like a breath of fresh air, light and refreshing, yet comforting at the same time. And that’s when it hit him. Lemmy.

It was probably on your second or third date when you both decided to grab a coffee at a small café. Joe went for his usual black coffee, and you chose an iced lemon tea. As you were sitting at the table, chatting and laughing about random things, you took a sip of your tea, but you misjudged it, and the lemon tea splashed all over your white, cute, short dress.

Joe looked at you, his eyes widening a bit, and then he laughed. “I knew you had something tangy about you, but this is a whole new level…” he teased, nudging you playfully. Even though you felt a bit embarrassed, you couldn’t help but laugh too.

That was the moment he started calling you “Lemmy,” and it became something just between the two of you. From that day on, even though you wear perfume, you always smelled like lemon to him. And in that moment, he realized just how much he missed you, how much he still cared.

When your eyes met Joel’s, his heart raced, he didn’t know how to react. Whether to smile or wave. Instead, he just kept a stoic expression. Everything felt like it was in slow motion, and he could see how your nose twitched when you noticed him. There was definitely something in your eyes when you saw him, but it quickly faded when another man appeared behind you.

The man wrapped his arms around you from behind, placing a kiss on your cheek, and waved at everyone just like you had moments ago. Who the hell is this? Is he your—

Suddenly, the guy lifted your hand, and Joel’s gaze immediately locked onto the sparkling, large diamond on your finger. The crowd erupted in cheers, clapping, standing up from their seats, and some even made their way over to you, ready to congratulate you. But Joel stayed frozen. In that moment, the world around him shattered.

He saw nothing but darkness, his insides twisted, and he felt an overwhelming wave of nausea. Without another word, he set his glass down on the bar and headed straight for the bathroom. He needed to escape, from everything, from you.

Tommy handed Joel the whiskey from before, noticing how tense he had become. Joel’s hands were clenched into fists, his fingers pressed tightly against his mouth. His eyes, dark, filled with anger, made everyone who met his gaze look away, intimidated by the storm brewing inside him.

He didn’t even look at Tommy when he took the glass from his hand, lifting it to his lips in one quick, almost reckless motion. The liquid burned his throat as it slid down, but it didn’t even register to Joel.

“Get me another,” he growled, pushing the empty glass toward Tommy without meeting his eyes. There was no gratitude in his voice, no acknowledgment of Tommy’s effort, just raw need, the kind of need that had nothing to do with the alcohol.

Tommy hesitated for a moment, feeling the tension in the air, but sighed and took the glass to the bar. Joel’s gaze was fixed on you the entire time, his body trembling with a combination of nerves and something far darker. His foot tapped against the floor, restless, as if the anticipation of seeing you and that guy together was slowly eating him alive.

The sight of you laughing, the carefree way you interacted with everyone around you, it was almost like you weren’t the same person who had been so close to him. The way you were looking at that guy, with a smile Joel used to be the one to receive. It made his heart tighten in his chest. The way that guy touched you, the way he leaned in close to whisper in your ear, it wasn’t right. Joel’s mind screamed at him.

That guy had no right to be that close to you, no right to touch you, no right to kiss you. He hadn’t earned that, not the way Joel had.

“Here’s another—” Tommy’s voice broke through Joel’s thoughts, but it didn’t seem to register at first. Tommy placed the glass on the table, but Joel didn’t waste a second. He grabbed it and drank it down quickly, as if he could drown the feeling in his chest, as if the whiskey could erase the image of you with someone else.

“Whoa, easy there. You don’t want to get drunk while she’s here—” Tommy warned, but Joel barely registered the caution in his voice.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Joel snapped, his voice low and tight with frustration. He finally turned to face Tommy, his anger unmistakable. His eyes burned with the sting of betrayal, but it wasn’t about Tommy keeping the secret. It was about you, about the feeling that he had been kept in the dark.

“Because I thought it would be better this way,” Tommy sighed, his gaze dropping to the floor.

“Better? Exactly what do you mean by that?” Joel scoffed sarcastically, his voice thick with frustration and anger. “I just didn’t want you to suffer before she would even arrive…” Tommy’s words sounded like he was trying to justify himself, but Joel wasn’t buying it.

Joel shook his head in disbelief, biting the inside of his mouth to keep himself from saying something he might regret. “Uh-huh, sure,” he muttered, his tone dripping with mock agreement.

Every word Tommy said only made Joel more angry. The feeling inside him was a mixture of disappointment, hurt, and a complete sense of betrayal. And the worst part? Seeing you, happy and carefree, with someone else, someone who had the right to touch you in ways Joel didn’t anymore. The anger bubbled up inside of him, mingling with an overwhelming sense of regret.

“Heyy!”

The familiar voice immediately pulled both Joel and Tommy’s attention. Their heads snapped toward you.

The moment Joel saw you, something inside him softened. Seeing you in person after all this time, so close, looking even more beautiful than he remembered—it did something to him. His clenched jaw, his tense muscles, all of it eased, and for a second, the hard exterior cracked just enough for a faint smile to appear on his face.

“Hey,” Joel greeted back, his voice no longer carrying the anger from before. It was calm, warm, until he noticed him.

The man standing behind you, smiling just as wide.

And just like that, the warmth vanished. Joel’s blood boiled as he watched the guy place his hands on your waist, holding you so casually. His own fists curled tight, knuckles turning white. If he could, he’d land a punch right across his smug face.

“Heyy, so who are these people?” The guy asked, his hands casually gripping your sides as if it was the most natural thing in the world. Joel felt his teeth grind together.

You turned slightly, gesturing towards Joel first. “This is Joel, my ex-boyfriend.”

Joel only nodded stiffly, his eyes locked onto the guy with a glare sharp enough to cut through steel.

“Ah, hi! I’m Ted. I’ve heard a lot about you.” The man stepped forward, extending a hand toward Joel, but Joel barely even looked at it, making it very clear that he had no intention of shaking it.

“O-kay…” Ted awkwardly retracted his hand, turning his attention to Tommy instead.

“And this is Tommy, his brother.”

This time, Tommy shook Ted’s hand without hesitation, though he side-eyed Joel, knowing exactly what was running through his mind.

For a moment, silence settled between you and Joel. When your eyes met again, you swallowed the lump forming in your throat before offering him a warm, almost nervous smile.

Joel, despite every raging emotion inside of him, somehow found it in himself to return it, barely.

Then, of course, Tommy spoke.

“So, when’s the wedding?”

Joel’s stomach dropped.

“Oh, yeah,” you chuckled, glancing at Ted before turning back to the Miller brothers. “We were actually planning to have it this week. Here.”

Tommy’s jaw nearly hit the floor. Joel, meanwhile, clenched his.

“You’re getting married here? In Jackson?!”

You laughed, nodding. “I have good memories here.”

Your eyes flickered back to Joel, as if expecting him to say something. But Joel wasn’t smiling anymore. He looked away, jaw tight, chest heavy, his entire body suddenly feeling too hot, too restless.

You noticed and for the first time that night, your heart ached. You had a feeling, no, you knew, how hard this had to be for him. Seeing you again after all this time, not just with someone else, but with a ring on your finger. Six months wasn’t that long, yet somehow, you had moved on. Found someone. Got engaged.

Meanwhile, Joel had been alone.

You glanced at him, a quiet, almost apologetic look on your face. But if he noticed it, he didn’t show it. His expression remained unreadable, his eyes trained on the floor, on his drink, anywhere but on you.

“That’s amazing!” Tommy’s voice broke the moment, his excitement bursting through. “Oh man, this is gonna be the best, most unforgettable wedding in Jackson history!”

His eyes shone with genuine happiness, completely oblivious to the way Joel’s grip on his glass tightened.

Even after everything, after you and Joel fell apart, no one in Jackson had ever stopped caring about you. You were still the kind-hearted soul everyone adored. The one always willing to help, the one who rarely ever had conflicts with anyone. That was just one of the many things Joel used to love about you. And still do.

“We need to announce it to everyone—”

“Wait.”

You stopped Tommy before he could get too carried away with his excitement.

“I just got here. Let’s hold off for a bit.”

Tommy gave you a nod of understanding, but when his gaze shifted to Joel, his enthusiasm dimmed. The joy over your wedding seemed to fade the moment he saw his brother’s face.

“Hey, Ted, how about we grab a whiskey? My treat.”

Ted smiled, glancing at you for approval. When you gave him a small nod, he pressed a quick kiss to your cheek before following Tommy to the bar.

Just before he left, you caught Tommy’s eye and silently mouthed thank you. He gave a small nod in return. Once they were finally far enough away, you sat down across from Joel. He still wouldn’t look at you.

You took a slow breath, steadying yourself before speaking. “How have you been?” Your voice was gentle, filled with concern.

Joel pressed his lips together, inhaling deeply. He stayed quiet for a long moment before finally meeting your gaze.

“Fine.” His voice was firm, clipped. “You?”

You knew him too well. Knew that “fine” never really meant fine. You hesitated before answering, your fingers fidgeting with the hem of your sleeve. “Fine,” you murmured, nodding slightly.

Joel nodded too. A meaningless, reflexive gesture. His fingers played absently with the empty glass in front of him, the calloused pads of his fingertips tracing invisible patterns against the rim.

Around you, the bar remained loud and full of life. Clinking glasses, muffled conversations, bursts of laughter. But at this table, there was only tension.

After a while, you finally exhaled, breaking the quiet.

“Joel, I didn��t come here to upset you or rub anything in your face.” Joel’s fingers twitched against the glass. His jaw tightened, and for a brief second, he shut his eyes, as if bracing himself.

You swallowed. “I came here—”

“To get married?”

The words were quiet, but there was an edge to them, sharp and bitter, like whiskey left too long on the tongue.

His eyes flicked up to meet yours, dark and unreadable beneath his furrowed brows. The grip he had on his glass tightened, but the rest of him was unnervingly still.

Your breath caught in your throat. You had expected this to be difficult, but not like this. Not the way his stare burned into you, not the way your heart twisted painfully at the sight of him like this.

Still, you refused to look away.

Joel clenched his jaw and went back to staring at the table, his fingers still absently tracing the rim of the glass. “Of all places…” he muttered under his breath, more to himself than to you.

You sighed, rubbing your palms together anxiously. “Joel—”

“Why here?” he cut you off, his voice quieter now, but no less intense. He finally looked back up, his expression unreadable. “Why Jackson?”

You exhaled, your eyes dropping to the table. This was hard. For a moment, you questioned if coming here had been the right choice. Sitting across from the man who had once been your whole world, the man who had been the first to show you what love truly felt like, maybe this was a mistake.

Because now, sitting here in the dim glow of the bar, with the scent of whiskey lingering between you, you could see it. The hurt he was trying to mask behind that hardened expression. Joel wasn’t just mad. He was heartbroken.

But you steadied yourself, refusing to waver.

“I wanted to see how you were holding up.”

You looked up at him, Joel only scoffed, shaking his head. A humorless, bitter laugh escaping his lips. He didn’t believe you. Not for a second.

“Joel, just because we ended things doesn’t mean I stopped caring about you.”

It was the truth, and deep down, he knew it. He could feel it, not just in your voice, but in the way your body shifted when you spoke, the way your eyes softened when you looked at him, the way you hesitated before choosing your words.

Still, he huffed, leaning back in his seat. His fingers drummed against the wood of the table before clenching into a fist.

“Uh huh, sure.”

His arrogance stung. No, more than that, it pissed you off.

Your hands curled into fists beneath the table, your nails pressing into your palms. “You can’t be mad at me for moving on—”

“Six months.” His voice cut through yours, sharp and dripping with irony.

“In six months, you found someone new and got engaged.”

Joel let out a dry chuckle, shaking his head again, his lips curling into something that was neither a smile nor a frown.

“That doesn’t feel a little… sudden to you?”

There it was, that tone. That frustrating, infuriating, arrogant tone he always used whenever you fought. The one that made your blood boil. The one that made you want to slap that damn smirk off his face.

“Ted is a good man.”

Joel let out a humorless chuckle, shaking his head as if he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He leaned back in his chair, throwing his head back to stare at the ceiling. He looked like he was asking whatever god might be up there if this was some kind of sick joke.

“He would never hurt me.”

You defended your fiancé, your voice steady, despite the way Joel’s reaction made your stomach twist uncomfortably. Joel let out another laugh, but there was nothing amused about it.

“Never hurt you—did I ever hurt you?”

His voice was low, sharp. He leaned in slightly, his expression unreadable, but his eyes burned with something deep and dark, like you offended him.

“No, but I’m a priority to him.”

The words were out before you could stop them. Joel’s eyes flickered, something shifting in them, something raw. He held your gaze for a moment, his jaw tightening, before he finally looked away.

“You were my priority.”

It was barely more than a whisper, but it hit you like a punch to the gut. For a second, just a second, something in you wavered. But then you clenched your jaw, forcing yourself to stay firm, to remind yourself why you were here.

“Joel, it’s too late—”

“I’ve changed.”

His voice broke slightly, his desperation slipping through the cracks of his carefully maintained exterior.

“Whether you believe it or not, I have. I realized things, and—”

“Joel.” You cut him off, your voice quiet, but sharp. A warning.

“It’s too late.”

Joel inhaled sharply, his fingers tightening around his glass before he finally let it go, his shoulders sagging under the weight of your words. He looked exhausted. Not just physically, but in a way that settled deep into his bones.

He regretted it. All of it. And if he could, you knew without a doubt, he’d turn back time. He’d fix everything. He’d do whatever it took to have you back. But it's too late.

“I know, Lemmy.”

His voice was barely above a whisper, rough and deep, like gravel scraping against pavement. It was almost lost in the noise of the bar, the clinking glasses, the distant laughter, the murmur of conversations, but you heard it.

You heard it damn well.

Hearing that name, your name, the one only he used, the one that belonged to a past you tried so hard to leave behind, hit you like a wave. It stirred something deep inside you, something bittersweet and painful all at once.

For a moment, you weren’t sitting in that bar, across from a man who wasn’t yours anymore. For a moment, you were back there.

Back in the warmth of his arms, back in those quiet nights when the world outside didn’t matter, when it was just the two of you, tangled together in whispers and laughter.

And just like that, the steel around your heart softened, just a little. You swallowed, forcing yourself to stay composed. But then you saw it.

A shimmer of unshed tears in Joel’s eyes. They didn’t fall, and maybe they never would, but they were there. Sitting heavy in his gaze, pooling just beneath the surface. Not that you could see them too well. Because he wasn’t looking at you.

His eyes were cast downward, glued to the table, to his hands, to anywhere but you. Like he couldn’t bear to meet your gaze. Like if he did, he might break completely.

You inhaled sharply, as if preparing to say something. Slowly, hesitantly, your hand inched forward, reaching for his. It was instinctive, like muscle memory.

You just wanted to touch him. To feel the roughness of his calloused skin against yours again, to squeeze his hand tightly, just once. Just to remind yourself that he was real. That this was real. But before your fingers could reach his, a voice broke through the thick tension between you.

“Hey, babe—man, I gotta say, the whiskey here is strong.” Ted’s voice was light, laced with laughter, completely oblivious to the storm raging between you and Joel. Maybe that was a good thing. Maybe it was better that he had no possible idea what's going on. You forced a small smile as you turned to look at him.

“I know,” you murmured softly, the warmth in your voice carefully manufactured. Joel didn’t even glance up. Didn’t acknowledge him.

Ted, still blissfully unaware, chuckled and ran a hand through his hair. “Anyway, I think I’ll grab one more, and then we should go get settled in. Sound good?”

“Yeah… that sounds great,” you agreed, nodding.

He grinned, leaned down, and pressed a kiss to the top of your head before making his way back to the bar, rejoining Tommy.

And just like that, the moment was gone. Your hand, still frozen midair, curled into a loose fist before you let it drop back to your lap.

“So… is he good to you?”

Joel’s voice was steady, but the weight behind the question was anything but casual. His gaze locked onto yours this time, holding it with an intensity that made your breath hitch.

You hesitated for a second, needing a moment to compose yourself before letting out a small laugh. “Yeah… he’s really good to me,” you admitted, a soft smile tugging at your lips as memories of Ted flooded your mind, the little things he did, the way he made you feel.

Joel gave a slow nod, his lips pressing together. “That’s all that matters.” His fingers flexed, curling into a fist.

“What about you?” you asked, tilting your head. “Do you have someone?”

“No.”

It was a simple answer. Too quick. Too flat. You had already known the answer before you asked, but curiosity, or something else, pushed you to hear it from him.

“Don’t worry,” you tried to reassure him, offering a small smile. “You’ll find the right one.” Joel gave another slow nod, but this time, there was something behind it. Something unreadable.

“I think I already did.” The air in the room shifted. Your heart skipped a beat. The way he was looking at you, God help you. It was dangerous.

That small smirk tugging at the corner of his lips, the way his eyes darkened ever so slightly, how his brows lifted just a fraction, it was too much.

You felt warmth creeping up your neck, a telltale flush blooming across your cheeks, and that familiar pulse between your legs, one that only Joel could create without even touching you.

You pressed your thighs together, shifting slightly in your seat as you cleared your throat. Everything suddenly felt too tight. The fabric of your clothes clinging to your skin, the air around you thick and heavy. All because of Joel.

“You okay?” His voice was innocent, as if he had no idea what he was doing to you, but that bastard knew.

“Yeah, I just… it’s warm in here.” You forced out a nervous laugh, willing yourself to act normal. Your fingers fidgeted with the hem of your sleeve as you deliberately avoided his eyes, afraid that one more look at him would make it worse.

But it was already getting worse. The heat pooling between your legs was undeniable now, and you hated yourself for it.

Joel noticed. Oh, he fucking noticed.

His lips curled into a smirk, one that made your stomach tighten even more.

“You want some water?”

That damn drawl. That damn voice. Your eyes snapped to his for a second too long, and that was a mistake. His gaze was slow, deliberate, dragging over you like he was peeling away every layer, reaching right into your head and reading every damn sinful thought.

“N-no thanks,” you stammered, crossing your arms over your chest as if that would somehow protect you from whatever the hell this was. But Joel just hummed, leaning back in his chair, fingers tapping lightly against the table.

Joel parted his lips, ready to say something. Something that lingered heavy on his tongue, something you weren’t sure you even wanted to hear. But before he could get a single word out, a loud “Whoops—shit—” cut through the air, and suddenly, you felt a body stumble against your chair.

Ted. Drunk off his ass. You barely caught him before he could topple right onto you, his weight throwing you off balance as you grabbed his arms.

“Jesus, Ted!” you hissed, steadying him as he let out a breathy laugh.

“Sorry, babe, I—whew, I think I had a bit too much.”

No shit.

Joel’s jaw clenched, his eyes darkening as he watched the scene unfold. He exhaled sharply through his nose, fingers twitching as if he had half a mind to yank Ted off you himself. But he didn’t, because he had no right to.

“Alright,” you sighed, helping Ted straighten up. “Time to get you to bed.”

Joel didn’t say anything. Didn’t move. Just sat there, watching, his expression unreadable. And you didn’t dare look at him as you guided Ted toward the door.

“Night, Joel,” was all you said before slipping outside, leaving him alone at the table. For a moment, Joel just sat there, his fingers gripping the edge of the table so tightly his knuckles turned white.

“Ayyyyy Joel!” Tommy. Just as drunk.

Joel turned his head slightly, watching his brother stumble toward him, a lazy grin plastered across his face.

“You look like shit,” Tommy slurred, plopping down in the seat across from him. Joel exhaled slowly, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Jesus Christ.”

The morning light barely crept through the curtains, casting a dull glow over the room. Joel sat at the table, hunched over with his arms crossed, his fingers gripping his biceps so tightly that his knuckles turned white. His jaw was locked, his teeth grinding together as he stared blankly at the scratched wooden surface. He hadn’t slept. Not a damn minute.

His mind had been trapped in an endless loop, replaying last night over and over again. Your voice, your touch, the way your lips curled into that soft smile when you talked. And then, the final insult. Watching his own brother laughing, drinking, bonding with your fiancé like they were lifelong friends.

The frustration simmering inside him turned into full-blown anger the moment he heard the sound of heavy footsteps stumbling down the hall. A loud thud followed, a clear indication that Tommy had managed to walk straight into a wall.

Joel exhaled sharply through his nose, his patience already worn thin.

Tommy finally appeared, looking like absolute hell. His hair was a mess, his shirt wrinkled, and his face pale with exhaustion. He groaned as he braced himself against the wall, rubbing his temples like he was trying to keep his skull from splitting open.

Joel’s eyes darkened as he watched him struggle.

“Isn’t that a little fucked up?” His voice was calm, but the bitterness in his tone was unmistakable.

Tommy blinked at him, still too dazed to fully register the question. “Huh?”

Joel pushed himself away from the table, standing up with slow, deliberate movements. “Last night. You got shitfaced with my ex’s fiancé. That doesn’t sit wrong with you?”

Tommy winced, rubbing his face as if that would somehow help him think clearer. But the weight of Joel’s words sank in quickly.

“Look—” he started, his voice hoarse, but Joel wasn’t in the mood to hear whatever excuse he was about to pull out of his ass.

“What, is he more important to you than I am?”

Tommy let out a long breath through his nose, looking away for a moment. “It’s my job to welcome new people.”

Joel let out a short, humorless laugh. “Welcome? You welcomed him by getting wasted and acting like he’s your new best damn friend?” His voice was rising, his frustration spilling over.

Tommy’s expression shifted. First defensive, then guilty. Joel shook his head, running a hand through his graying hair before muttering, “You know what? Fine. If he’s more important to you than your own brother, then go ahead. Enjoy your new drinking buddy.”

With that, he turned on his heel, already heading for the door.

Tommy scrambled forward, his hangover momentarily forgotten as he grabbed Joel’s arm. “Joel, wait—wait. I’m sorry, alright? I wasn’t thinking.” His voice was earnest now, the regret finally sinking in.

Joel hesitated, his body tense under Tommy’s grip. A long silence stretched between them before he finally exhaled through his nose. “Okay.”

But it didn’t sound like forgiveness. It sounded like Joel was too damn tired to argue anymore.

He pulled his arm free and walked out, leaving Tommy standing there, rubbing his face in frustration.

You had been in Jackson for a second day now. While you were busy enjoying yourself, Joel was completely fucked. And the worst part? You hadn’t even done anything. You just existed—and that was the problem.

Every time Joel saw you, it was like a punch to the gut. Memories crashed into him, relentless and unforgiving. He remembered the quiet nights by the campfire, watching the stars while your body curled up against his. He remembered your naked, warm body, pressed against his after sex. He remembered the way his hands traced the curves of your body, the way your breath hitched when he thrust into you, the way you moaned his name.

Good old days. Good didn’t even cover it. The kind of memories that made Joel’s dick twitch in his jeans.

The bar was alive with music and laughter, people drinking, talking, letting loose after another long day. Joel leaned against the counter, fingers wrapped around a glass he had barely touched. His gaze wasn’t on his drink. It was on you.

You were on the dance floor with Teddy, moving like you didn’t have a single care in the world. Spinning, swaying, jumping, every motion effortless, magnetic. Even in the chaos of the crowd, you stood out. The way your hair swayed with every movement, the way your clothes clung to your body like they were made just for you. The way your lips parted in laughter, the pure joy radiating from you.

Joel clenched his jaw, his grip tightening around the glass.

He wanted to run straight to you, grab you, steal you away. To kiss you, hard, possessively, until you melted against him, until you gave in and kissed him back just as desperately. He could already feel the way your body would mold against his, the way your lips would part for him.

Every nerve in his body screamed at him to do it. To take what was his. But his morality was stronger. At least for now.

With a sharp exhale, Joel turned away from the dance floor and knocked back the rest of his drink in one go. The burn of the liquor didn’t even register; his frustration ran hotter. He let out a rough groan as he set the glass down, rubbing his fingers over his eyes, trying to ground himself. For just a moment, he let himself drift. But a moment was all he got.

“Hey!”

Your voice-soft, breathless from dancing-yanked him right back to reality. His body reacted before his brain did, his head turning toward you. And fuck, he couldn’t even stop himself from smiling.

A quiet hey slipped from his lips in return.

You leaned against the bar beside him, still catching your breath. “Water with lemon, please,” you told the bartender before exhaling deeply. Joel huffed a laugh.

“What?” you asked, eyes narrowing in playful confusion.

Joel shook his head, a quiet chuckle escaping his lips. “Lemon… just, never mind.”

You knew exactly where he was going with that. The realization made you laugh, lowering your gaze to the countertop.

“Yeah, I still like lemon,” you admitted softly, smiling to yourself.

Joel looked at you then, really looked at you. His eyes, dark and steady, held none of their usual guardedness. There was something raw there, something quiet but intense. Like he was searching for something in you. Like he was remembering.

And God, the way he was looking at you, warm, familiar, dangerous, sent a shiver down your spine. It was the kind of look that made your stomach tighten, the kind that made your chest feel too small for your racing heart.

You swallowed, suddenly hyper-aware of how close you were standing. Of the space between you. Thin, fragile, easy to cross.

“So, when’s the wedding?”

Joel’s voice cut through the moment like a blade, pulling you back to reality. You blinked, startled, as if waking from a trance. It took you a second to even process the question.

“Oh, um… we don’t really know yet,” you admitted, glancing toward Teddy. He was across the room, slow-dancing with an elderly woman, spinning her carefully with that goofy grin of his. You let out a soft laugh at the sight.

Joel followed your gaze, watching for a beat. But unlike you, he didn’t laugh. He just looked, expression unreadable, something flickering behind his eyes. Then, as if remembering himself, he finally tore his gaze away and turned back to you, forcing a small smile.

“He’s a real character, huh?”

You nodded, still smiling. “Yeah… he is.”

Joel’s eyes traced over your features, studying you like you were some kind of rare art piece he’d never get to touch again. His gaze lingered on the soft dimples that formed when you smiled, the curve of your nose, your long lashes, the smoothness of your cheeks, the swell of your chest, how your dress hugged every right place, fuck.

He tore his gaze away so fast it almost hurt, swallowing thickly. He prayed you hadn’t noticed. If you had, you didn’t show it. But how could he not look? You were impossible to ignore, the kind of woman who turned heads without even trying. It wasn’t just Joel, hell, every guy in the damn bar had stolen a glance at you at some point tonight. They had good reason.

You were a fucking knockout.

Joel exhaled slowly, trying to regain control. “Remember that time we went fishing, and you almost fell in the river?” His voice came out steadier than he felt.

You snorted, shaking your head. “Almost? I did fall in the river. You laughed your ass off instead of helping me.”

Joel chuckled, the memory warming something deep inside him. “In my defense, it was funny as hell.”

“You are so lucky I didn’t drag you in with me.”

He smirked. “You tried. You’re just not strong enough.”

You playfully gasped, feigning offense. “Excuse me? I was so strong.”

Joel raised a brow. “Oh yeah? Prove it.”

You rolled your eyes, about to come up with some witty comeback, but the way he was looking at you suddenly changed. His playful smirk faded into something more serious.

“Listen,” he started, his voice dropping just a bit, becoming softer, steadier. His fingers tapped lightly against his glass as he searched for the right words. “I know things didn’t end the way they should’ve. And I know you’ve moved on but-“

Before he could finish, a familiar arm slid around your waist, pulling you in close.

“Hey, babe,” Teddy’s voice was laced with tipsy affection. You barely had time to react before he leaned in, pressing a warm, lingering kiss against your lips. Right in front of Joel.

Joel stiffened, every muscle in his body locking up as he watched. He forced himself to stay still, to not react, to not let his jaw tighten or his fists clench at his sides. But inside, he was burning.

You let out a startled squeal, eyes wide open as Teddy stole your breath away with the sudden kiss. It wasn’t bad, but the surprise had you momentarily stunned. By the time he finally pulled away, you were left breathless, blinking as you tried to process what had just happened.

“Wow…” you exhaled, regaining your composure. But then your gaze flickered to Joel. And oh, he was fuming.

He wasn’t outright glaring, no, but you knew him too well. The sharp clench of his jaw, the way his lips pressed into a thin, unforgiving line, and the burning intensity in his dark eyes said it all. Jealousy. Pure, unfiltered jealousy.

It wasn’t the first time you’d seen that look on his face. Joel had always been possessive, even when you were together. Any guy who so much as looked at you too long earned that same lethal stare. It didn’t matter if it was a stranger at the market, a coworker making polite conversation, or even the poor bartender who had the audacity to compliment your choice of drink.

And while sometimes it had been frustrating, having to remind him that you were perfectly capable of handling yourself, there was something about it that excited you. It was intoxicating, really.

Because Joel’s jealousy wasn’t just about control. It was about claiming. It was about the way he needed you, the way he couldn’t stand the thought of anyone else having you, touching you, making you smile. It was his way of saying she’s mine, without needing to speak the words aloud.

And right now, even though you were no longer his, even though time had passed and you were engaged to someone else, Joel still looked at you like he was ready to drag you away and remind you exactly who you used to belong to.

Heat pooled low in your stomach, the tension between you palpable. You could practically feel him burning holes into you, into Teddy’s arm still draped around your waist.

Teddy, completely oblivious to the brewing storm, just chuckled, swaying slightly from the alcohol in his system. “You okay, babe? Didn’t mean to surprise ya.”

You managed a small laugh, patting his chest. “Yeah, I’m good.” Joel scoffed. Low, barely audible, but enough to make you glance at him again.

And oh, the way his fingers curled against the bar, the way his shoulders tensed as if he was physically restraining himself from doing something reckless, something dangerous. You knew exactly what he was thinking. And God help you, but it thrilled you.

“Oh, hey Joel!” Teddy greeted him, as if he had only just noticed him standing there, as if Joel hadn’t been watching the whole damn time. His tone was casual, almost dismissive, making Joel look like an afterthought. Like he wasn’t even worth acknowledging until now.

Joel’s jaw flexed. His fingers twitched against the bar. He wanted nothing more than to wipe that smug, drunken grin off Teddy’s face.

But instead, he just nodded, a slow, forced acknowledgment. He refused to let himself look like a sulking idiot. “Teddy,” he replied flatly, voice rough with something unreadable. Then, just as quickly, his eyes were back on you.

And you felt it everywhere. That heat. That undeniable pull. You bit your lip, trying to suppress the way your thighs instinctively pressed together. But it was pointless, because that familiar ache was already blooming inside you, that unbearable pulse between your legs that only he could stir up. And that was the worst part was, that Teddy had never done this to you. Never made your body react with just a look.

Never made your skin prickle, never made your stomach twist with need, never made your breath hitch with anticipation. But Joel did it effortlessly. Whether he meant to or not.

It was as if you were drunk; quickly, scenes with Joel started to pop into your head. Twisted and passionate memories that, whether you liked it or not, you longed to experience again. Not with Teddy, with Joel.

You wanted to feel him inside you again, to feel him stretching you out, to feel his saliva, his lips, his muscular body, the scratch of his beard against your skin. The memories rushed in, vivid and intoxicating, taking over your thoughts like a flood.

Joel was watching you, and he couldn’t help but notice the sudden shift in your behavior. His eyes quickly moved to your legs, specifically your thighs, which were pressed tightly together, trying to calm the pulsing between your legs.

Joel immediately knew what was happening. A devilish grin spread across his face as he locked eyes with you. He didn’t say a word, but his eyes spoke volumes. He knew exactly what he was doing to you. He knew what you were feeling.

“Well, I guess we should head out, huh?” Ted shook you gently, and you were a bit out of it, but nodded and mumbled in response.

You looked at Joel one last time, your face eager and full of desire, before you disappeared into the crowd, and then out of the bar.

Joel was in a trance. Not only did this boost his ego, but also brought pleasure to you, and his own hardness pressing against his pants. Unfortunately, everything had to be taken care of on his own, especially the last part.

He let out a frustrated breath, closing his eyes for a moment so he could still picture you, just for a little while longer, before ordering another drink.

It was late. Joel couldn’t even tell what day it was anymore, or how many had passed since you arrived. All he knew for certain was that tomorrow… tomorrow was your wedding. Some random asshole was about to take you from him. Marry you. Make you his. And Joel? He’d just stand there, watching, powerless. Hell, maybe Ted would even throw him a little smile while doing it.

Sleep had become a distant memory. Joel couldn’t recall the last night, since you came back, when he’d actually rested. Not more than twenty damn minutes. He was lying on his back, fingers laced together, resting on his stomach as he stared up at the ceiling like it held some kind of answer. It didn’t. The only thing up there was silence… and the ticking time bomb in his chest, waiting for tomorrow to detonate.

He kept going back and forth in his head, whether or not to even show up to the wedding. You’d invited him. You wanted him there. God knows why, but you did.

But was it really a good idea? Watching you walk down the aisle in that long, white dress, glowing, beautiful, looking like a dream, only to stand there among the crowd, not at the altar where he should be? Not the one reaching for your hands, not the one kissing you when it’s all said and done?

The thought alone made his stomach turn. It felt like all of his thoughts were eating him alive.

Gnawing, scratching, pulling at every piece of his sanity like starving wolves. He couldn’t close his eyes without seeing you. Couldn’t breathe without remembering how it used to feel when you were next to him. The ache in his chest was constant, a heavy pressure that no amount of alcohol or silence could ease.

And then, a knock.

Joel scoffed quietly, shaking his head with a bitter chuckle. Great. Now he was hallucinating. That was the next step, right? After days without sleep and with a heart falling apart. Maybe this was a dream. Or maybe he was finally losing it.

But then came a second knock. Clearer. More real.

He froze, eyes glued to the ceiling. He told himself it wasn’t real. Just a trick of the mind. But then—

“Joel? Are you home?”

His heart stopped. Your voice. He sat up so fast the world spun, legs tangled in the sheets as he scrambled toward the door, barely catching his balance as he slipped on the wooden floor. His breath hitched. No time to think. No time to panic. Just before unlocking it, he took a second to fix his hair and smooth his shirt. He had to look like he’d been asleep, cool, casual, unaffected.

But when he opened the door, the act fell apart.

You were standing there. Bare legs. Thin pajama shorts. An oversized T-shirt clinging to you from the cold, your arms wrapped tightly around your chest as you shivered, teeth chattering hard enough to echo. Outside, the snow fell in soft sheets. It had to be at least negative five.

“Jesus Christ—are you okay?” Joel’s voice cracked with disbelief and panic.

You nodded, barely. “C-c-can I come in?” you managed, breath visible in the frozen air.

“Yeah, shit, of course,” Joel stepped aside immediately, holding the door wide as you stumbled past him on trembling legs. “What the hell were you thinking? You could’ve frozen out there.”

He placed a hand on your back, gentle but firm, guiding you into the kitchen with urgency. His palm was warm, so warm it made you realize just how cold you were.

“Sit down, sit,” he said, pulling out a chair for you. Within seconds, he returned with a thick blanket, carefully wrapping it around your shoulders, tucking it in around you like he was afraid you’d fall apart if he didn’t.

“Tea with lemon?” he asked softly, though the ghost of a smile was already tugging at his lips.

You gave a quiet laugh, still shivering, your voice just a whisper. “Still my favorite.”

Joel chuckled too, just under his breath, and went to put the kettle on. He didn’t ask why you were there. Not yet. Part of him didn’t want to know, because if you said the wrong thing, if this wasn’t what he hoped it was… he wasn’t sure he’d survive it.

The silence in the room felt heavy, almost suffocating. All that could be heard was the faint hum of the kettle heating the water and the sound of your teeth gritting together in a nervous rhythm.

Joel stood just a few feet away, watching you from behind. His eyes were fixed on the back of your head, his thoughts racing, though he didn’t dare speak. He wanted to know what was going on in your mind, but he wasn’t about to push you. Not now, not in this fragile moment.

Joel’s gaze flickered to the counter, where the kettle was just starting to steam. The sound of the water heating was the only thing breaking the silence. He shifted his weight from one foot to the other, his fingers twitching at his sides, desperate to do something. But what could he do?

The kettle hissed as it came to a boil, and Joel’s eyes moved to it for a moment, as if distracted by the sound. He didn’t say anything. He just waited, the silence stretching on, knowing that eventually, things would have to be said. But for now, he didn’t know what to say, or if it was even his place to speak.

The room felt frozen in time, the ticking of a clock somewhere in the distance the only indication that the world outside still moved. Joel’s thoughts were racing, but his lips remained sealed, respecting the space between you.

“Here,” Joel said, placing the steaming mug of tea beside you and sitting down across from you. “Be careful, it’s hot,” he warned, watching as you reached for it. You glanced up at him and nodded, your hands slowly falling back into your lap.

You weren’t shaking anymore, looking a bit better, though your nose was still red from the cold. It was cute though, Joel couldn’t help but notice how that little splash of color made you seem even more delicate.

The kicthen was quiet again. The only sound was the soft hiss of the tea cooling, along with the occasional shift of your body as you tried to warm up. Joel watched you in silence, unsure of what to say. Something about your vulnerability made him hesitate.

After a few minutes, when the tea had cooled down and you’d almost finished it, you started to regain some color in your face and stopped shaking. The warmth from the drink seemed to finally be working its magic. Joel, however, had been quietly watching you, his gaze flicking between your shivering body and the empty mug in your hands. He couldn’t hold it in any longer.

“So, are you going to tell me what made you come here at this hour, in this weather, dressed like that?” He raised an eyebrow and gave you a pointed look, his eyes lingering on your pajamas, which definitely weren’t the best choice for a night like this. The cold air outside seemed to have crept in through the walls, but here you were, looking far too exposed in your soft, worn-out clothes.

You let out a long, frustrated sigh, the weight of the situation pressing down on you. It took you a moment before you spoke, as if you were trying to find the right words, or maybe just gathering the courage to say it.

“I had a fight with Ted.” Your voice was small, almost trembling, and Joel’s eyes immediately flickered with a brief flash of joy, relief and hope. But when he saw how utterly crushed you seemed, the spark in his eyes quickly dimmed.

“Look, it’s just the typical pre-wedding stress—” Joel tried to reassure you, though his words were awkward, his attempt at comforting you not quite landing right. But before he could finish, you cut him off.

“No, this wasn't just some typical pre-wedding argument,” you said, locking eyes with Joel.

For a moment, it felt like time has stopped, as if you were peering straight into his soul. There was something raw in your gaze, an intensity that made him feel the weight of your words even more. It wasn’t just about the wedding, it was about something deeper.

“This was… more serious,” you added, your voice trailing off slightly as you lowered your gaze.

Joel’s heart tightened as he watched your expression shift, and without warning, he saw the first of your tears fall. They were slow at first, like they were hesitant to break free, but soon they started streaming down your cheeks.

Joel fought with himself, struggling not to reach out, not to pull you into his arms. It tore him apart to see you like this. His hands were clenched into fists, his knuckles turning white from the pressure. He took a deep breath, trying to hold back. But he couldn’t take it anymore. What kind of man would he be if he didn’t comfort you right now?

He stood up from his seat, moving toward you, and as soon as you felt his presence, your arms instinctively wrapped around him, burying your face deep into his shirt and stomach. Joel didn’t care that your tears left a damp spot on his shirt, it was a small price to pay for being close to you again.

It felt… comforting. To have you so near, to be the one you turned to in this situation.

There was something reassuring about the fact that you came to him when you were at your lowest. He was the first person you thought of, the first person you wanted to see. That thought didn’t just swell his ego, it also gave him a quiet confidence. He still had a place in your heart, he was there, in the background, in some shadowed corner of your soul, but he was still there. And that was all that mattered to him.

Joel’s hand gently stroked the top of your head, his fingers running through your soft, voluminous hair. The motion was comforting, the familiar scent of whiskey and warmth surrounding you. It was everything you needed in this moment, knowing that he wouldn’t judge you, that he was there for you, and that he wouldn’t leave until he was certain you were okay.

You took a deep, shaky breath, pulling away slightly from him, your hands quickly wiping away the tears. Joel knelt down in front of you, bringing his face level with yours. His wolf eyes, stared into yours as his hands cupped your cheeks gently, guiding your gaze to meet his.

“It’s going to be alright,” he whispered softly, his thumb brushing across your cheek as he wiped away the last tears. His touch was reassuring, grounding you in the moment, as if his presence alone could erase all your worries.

His voice, his face, everything about him was so sincere, so convincing. You simply nodded, your heart swelling. Before you could say anything else, Joel pulled you into a tight embrace. One hand rested at the back of your head, the other wrapped securely around your back.

It wasn’t just an ordinary hug of comfort; there was something much deeper. Joel was telling you without any words, how much you meant to him, how much he misses you, and how he would drop everything just for you. His embrace spoke volumes that words couldn’t quite capture, a silent promise that he was here, fully present, and never truly gone.

“I… can I…” The words were hard to say, not because you were pressed so tightly against his chest, but because you were still questioning yourself, wondering if it was the right thing to do.

“Can I stay at your place tonight?”

Joel’s eyes widened in surprise. He slowly pulled his hands from your body, sliding them down to your shoulders, gently moving you just enough to see your face. He tried to read something in your glassy, red eyes, but it was difficult. Your emotions were tangled up, impossible to decipher at that moment.

“Of course, Lemmy,” he replied softly, offering you a warm, reassuring smile. You smiled back, the gesture comforting, but there was something more lingering in the air, something unspoken between you two.

If things were different, Joel might have leaned in and kissed you deeply. A soothing kiss to tell you that everything will be okay. But he held back, not wanting to cross a line, not wanting to be a fucking asshole, that will destroy your wedding.

“You can sleep upstairs,” Joel said as he got up from his knees and pointed upward. You nodded, standing up, carefully peeling the blanket off and folding it over the chair. Following Joel up the stairs, you couldn’t help but steal a glance at him. The t-shirt and sweatpants shaping his body perfectly. It was a long time ago since you saw him naked, and fuck, deeply in your head, you wanted to restore the memory.

“Here… you can wear this,” Joel said, as you both reached the room. He pulled out a t-shirt and sweatpants from the drawer, neatly folded in a pile, and handed them to you.

“Thank you,” your voice was soft as you took the clothes, your fingers slightly brushed against his. The spark between your skin was electric, and for a brief moment, everything felt too close.

Joel cleared his throat, trying to break the akward silence, rubbing the back of his neck. “So, um… if you need anything, I’ll be downstairs,” with thosw words, Joel walked around you, ready to leave. But before he could, you quickly grabbed his biceps. His eyes shifted from your hand to your face, his eyebrows raised in confusion and surprise.

“Pleade, stay,” you said, your voice tinged with desperation. You were so hopeless, that you just asked your ex to stay in the same room at night. It was fucking insane, but Joel was even more out of his mind for actually agreeing.

As you began to change, Joel quickly turned his back. It felt strange, he’d seen you naked countless times before, in far more awkward and vulnerable situations. But this time, he couldn’t shake the need to turn away. It wasn’t about modesty; it was the weight of everything that had changed between you.

Still, his male instincts kicked in, and despite his effort to be polite, he couldn’t resist peeking over his shoulder. The sight of you took his breath away.

You looked even more stunning than he remembered. Your skin was glowing, smooth and fresh, and even from a distance, he could smell the faint lemony scent that seemed to cling to you. His throat went dry as he swallowed hard, and he immediately forced his eyes back to the front, as if doing so would somehow erase the image from his mind.

But it didn’t. In fact, all of his blood seemed to rush into his dick, feeling himself hardening against the soft fabric of his sweatpants. Right now, he cursed himself for not wearing underwear.

Joel threw his head back, closing his eyes as he inhaled deeply, trying to steady himself. He focused on his breathing, desperately trying to regain control, but his body had other ideas.

His thoughts raced, and despite his best efforts, he couldn’t stop his body from responding. He silently cursed, wishing his mind and his body would sync up, but, unsurprisingly, it didn’t happen.

“Okay,” you said, your voice cutting through the tension, signaling that you were finished changing.

Joel slowly turned around, his gaze drifting down from your feet, slowly taking in the soft curve of your legs, then moving upward, pausing for a moment as he reached your face. His eyes lingered for a moment longer than necessary, before quickly breaking the stare and forcing himself to look away.

“Alright, I’ll go grab the blanket for myself,” Joel said, nodding as he turned away to leave. But just as he took a step, you spoke again, your voice stopping him.

“Why?” you asked, your tone genuinely confused. Joel froze in place, his body tensing. He slowly turned around to face you, unsure of how to interpret your question.

For a moment, he just stared at you, trying to figure out if you were being serious or if it was just some sarcastic remark. His gaze lingered on you, trying to read the expression on your face, but there was no hint of irony or playfulness in your eyes. You seemed genuinely puzzled.

When Joel realized you weren’t joking, he shifted nervously. His hands instinctively moved to cover his growing erection, trying to be as discreet as possible, hoping you wouldn’t notice. He cursed himself for his body’s reaction, but he couldn’t help it.

“You… you’re not going to sleep in bed with me?” The question fell from your lips before either of you could think about it. It was blunt, straightforward, and as soon as the words left your mouth, both of you were caught off guard.

Joel’s body went completely still. It was like time froze for a second. His eyes widened, and his mind scrambled to make sense of your words. He genuinely thought he must be imagining all of this. His thoughts were racing, and the atmosphere in the room suddenly felt thick and charged.

“Do you want me to?” Joel asked, his eyebrows shooting up in surprise as he genuinely sought your answer.

You hesitated for a moment. He was basically giving you one last chance to back out, to say no and keep things from getting even more complicated. It was like he was offering you an escape, a way to avoid making everything worse. But you chose to push forward, testing fate.

You nodded quickly, your heart pounding in your chest. Joel let out a deep breath, his gaze dropping to the floor. He wasn’t sure what to do with himself.

It definitely wasn’t the 'right' decision, but it was what you wanted.

You slid into the bed and pulled the covers over yourself, the warmth of the blanket comforting against the tension in your chest. Joel followed, slowly settling behind you.

“Good night,” you whispered, your voice soft, and Joel replied in a deep, quiet tone, his words almost a murmur in the silence. You turned your back to him, but your eyes were open. You couln't sleep, you didn't want to.

For a moment, Joel lay there, staring at the ceiling, his thoughts racing. His mind couldn’t quite catch up with what is happening. Was he really here, in this bed, with you again after everything? The reality of the situation hit him, and he lay there motionless, trying to process the whirlwind of emotions swirling in his chest.

But then he turned, his eyes fixed on you even though your back was facing him. He missed that, the scent of citrus in his bed, a smell he hadn’t realized he longed for until now.

Even with your back to him, you could feel the weight of his gaze on you, intense and unrelenting. You didn’t dare to turn around, knowing that if you did, things would never be the same between you. You focused on the idea of sleep instead, trying to block out the thoughts racing in your mind.

Tomorrow was your big day, the one you’d been looking forward to with the best man in the world. And yet, you found yourself lying in your ex’s bed. Great. But you didn’t want to think about that. You just wanted to sleep, hoping you wouldn’t wake up looking like a complete zombie.

You shifted, trying to find a more comfortable position. But with each small movement, you found yourself inching closer to Joel, until there was barely any space between you two. It got so close that your ass brushed against his erection.

He closed his eyes, holding his breath, praying that you wouldn’t move again. The air between you two was thick with tension, his mind spinning with a thousand thoughts, none of them good.

But you did move again. You kept adjusting, trying to get comfortable, unaware, or perhaps fully aware, of the effect it had on him. With each movement, you teased him more and more, rubbing against him in a way that only made things worse.

Then you felt it. The unmistakable pressure. The heat of his reaction. It hit you all at once, and everything clicked into place. Your stomach dropped as you realized it.

With a sharp gasp, you turned quickly, putting some space between you. Your heart raced, and the shame burned in your cheeks.

You stared at him, a mix of disgust, surprise, and anger flooding your face. “Joel, what the fuck?!” you hissed under your breath, careful not to wake the neighbors, but making sure your frustration was clear.

He rubbed his face with his hand, as if trying to erase the embarrassment that had suddenly washed over him.

“I’m sorry, okay?” he murmured, his voice soft against his palm, before he lowered it to his side and met your gaze. “I can’t control it, especially not when you’re doing… what you’re doing.

You pursed your lips, offended, your brow furrowing in disbelief. “And what exactly am I doing? I was just trying to get comfortable!”

Joel let out a soft laugh, closing his eyes for a moment, shaking his head in amusement. He looked at you with a teasing grin, almost mocking you. “Sure you were.”

Your anger flared, and with a sharp breath, you turned your back to him again, refusing to look at him any longer. You had your eyes shut tightly, the anger seeping into your blood, sinking deep into your body like an unwelcome weight. How the hell could that asshole even think that-

But then, suddenly, something shifted. Your muscles, tense and wound tight with rage, began to loosen, and the anger, while still there, didn’t grip you as hard. You opened your eyes slowly, the shift in your thoughts catching you off guard.

And then it hit you.

You remembered how Joel used to act in sour presence back in the day, how every small movement you made, every accidental brush of your body, would send him spiraling. He couldn’t help himself. He’d stiffen, his eyes would burn with that intensity, and you’d know, without a word, that he was consumed by desire. You’d seen it countless times: a slight touch, a momentary glance, and there he was, completely undone.

But now, you were with someone else.

You closed your eyes again, the realization bitter in your chest. You were engaged now. You had a fiancé, a man who was calm, steady, neutral. He didn’t react to you like that. He didn’t make your skin burn with that same, reckless intensity. With him, it was different. Safe. Predictable.

But Joel… Joel was still Joel. And even now, every time you were close to him, you could still feel the shift. The way his body reacted at the slightest sign of proximity. The way his eyes darkened, the way he couldn’t help himself, even if he was no longer yours. It was like a reflex.

And that thought, that realization, made everything feel so much more complicated. You were about to marry someone who didn’t make you feel the same rush of emotions, who didn’t make your body ache with tension the way Joel could with just a look. But was that enough? Was that really what you wanted?

“Fuck it.”

Without thinking, without considering the consequences, you spun around quickly, your body moving almost on instinct. In that moment, everything else faded away, the thoughts, the circumstances, the guilt, and you pressed your lips to Joel’s, hard and urgent. The kiss was raw, intense, filled with all the pent-up desire you had been trying to bury since the moment you set foot back in Jackson.

Joel was caught off guard at first. He let out a low, confused growl, clearly unsure of what was happening, but that hesitation didn’t last long. The moment his hands found their way to your body, they pulled you closer with a force that made your breath catch. His large hands gripped your back, his fingers digging into your skin, holding you tightly against him, and you melted into him, feeling the heat of his body against yours.

Your heart pounded in your chest as you kissed him with a desperation you couldn’t explain. It wasn’t just passion. It was more. It was a storm of emotions, a whirlwind of regret, longing, and something deeper, something you had been trying so hard to forget, but it was still there.

The way he kissed you was familiar, as if nothing had changed. His lips, his touch, his scent, they were all the same, and yet everything felt so different now.

You knew, deep down, that you’d regret this. You knew that the guilt would hit you in waves as soon as this moment was over. You’d lie awake later, berating yourself, torn between the man you were supposed to marry and the man who still held so much power over you. But yet, you still couldn't stop yourself from creating a total disaster.

You wanted this. You needed this. Even if it meant facing the consequences later.

Your fingers found his hair, messy and thick beneath your touch, and you didn’t hesitate, you gripped it tightly, pulling, scratching at his scalp with a need you didn’t even try to hide.

The low, breathy whimper that escaped Joel’s throat sent a pulse straight through your body. God, that sound, so raw, so desperate, it only made you want more.

Your core throbbed, a slow, aching rhythm between your thighs, growing stronger every time your tongue met his. It was like every brush, every swirl of his tongue against yours, set off another wave of heat that rippled through your whole body. And Joel…Joel was lost in it. Completely, entirely, deliciously lost in you.

He kissed you like he was starving. Like he hadn’t tasted anything real in years and now you were the only thing that existed. Every movement was hungry, almost frantic, but underneath it all was something deeper.

He had dreamed of this. Not just the sex—though, God, yes, the sex—but you. All of you. Your voice, your touch, the way your body pressed into his like you belonged there. Joel had spent countless nights thinking about you. Wishing for you. Wanting you back in ways he never dared say out loud.

And now? Now, it felt like every single one of those wishes had come true.

If you asked him what he wanted under the Christmas tree, it was you. If you asked him what he wished for when he blew out the candles on his birthday cake, it was you. Every damn time. Always you.

And tonight, you gave him that gift. Unwrapped, raw, trembling in his arms. You gave him something he’d longed for in silence for far too long, and he couldn’t have been happier.

You could feel it in the way his hands moved over your body, reverent but greedy, like he still couldn’t quite believe you were real. That you were here. That he got to have this, just once more.

Neither of you knew when or how your clothes had disappeared. It was a blur—hands, lips, breathless gasps—and now you were both completely bare, tangled in each other, your skin pressed against his, warm and electric.

You were straddling him, your thighs resting on either side of his hips, and Joel looked up at you like you were something divine. His rough hands roamed your body as if memorizing every curve all over again, while his lips found the tender skin of your neck. He kissed, nipped, and finally bit, just hard enough to make you gasp.

“Fuck, I missed this,” he groaned against your throat, his voice deep, low, and raw, hungry. That sound alone sent a shiver rolling straight down your spine.

You whimpered softly, overwhelmed, your hands buried in his hair, clinging to him as his fingers curled around your breast, teasing your nipple between calloused fingertips. It was too much. Too much and not enough all at once. His touch had your entire body aching, trembling in anticipation, and yet… you hadn’t even really started.

Joel pulled back just enough to look at you, his eyes burning with something wild and unspoken. There was tension there, but also something vulnerable. Like he wasn’t sure if this was real. If you were real.

But looking at your eyes and the way you bit your lips, it was all he needed. This answers all his questions.

His hands gripping your waist tighter, helping your body lowering into his. You hissed, gripping his shoulders as he slowly pushed himself into you.

“Easy Lemmy, easy” his voice made you relax and open up more. Joel always knew what works on you, how to make you wet, and he didn't even need to ask.

When you were finally submerged to the base, Joel gave you a second to catch your breath. He was very accommodating, because if he was in charge, he would have been pumping you head over heels a long time ago.

Then, you started moving. It wasn’t rushed. It was slow, intense, and electric. Every motion was filled with something more than just lust. There was history here. There was pain. There was love, buried deep beneath layers of old wounds. You held on to him like you were afraid the moment might vanish if you let go. And as your bodies moved together, everything else fell away.

You knew you’d regret this. But right now? You didn’t care.

Your bodies moved in sync, slow and heavy, like the world outside that room had stopped spinning. There was nothing but you and him, your breath hitching, his hands guiding, your skin sliding against his as your hips rocked together with increasing urgency.

Joel’s head tilted back against the pillow, jaw clenched, eyes fluttering shut as he gripped your waist harder, grounding himself in the feeling of you. “Jesus…” he muttered, voice hoarse and cracked. “You feel… fuck, you feel like home.”

That word hit you somewhere deep. Home.

You hadn’t felt that in so long. Not really. And now, here you were, drowning in it, in warmth, in memory, in him.

You leaned down, kissing him again, this time slower. Your lips moved lazily over his, but everything underneath was anything but calm. His hands slid up your back, fingers digging in like he didn’t want to lose you again. Like holding you tighter would make time stop.

Your rhythm grew faster, more desperate. The room was filled with breathless gasps, with the sound of skin against skin, with the quiet creaks of the mattress as the tension built between you like a storm.

He looked up at you, eyes half-lidded, cheeks flushed, hair a mess, and you knew, he was completely undone. But not just by your body. By the feelings he never let himself say out loud. The pain. The want.

“God, I’ve missed you,” he whispered, breath trembling as one hand cupped your face, his thumb brushing your cheekbone like you were something fragile.

“Joel” you whined, your body trembling now too, that familiar tightening beginning to coil deep in your stomach. You buried your face into his neck, whimpering as the pleasure climbed, built, flooded every nerve in your body.

And then, it crashed.

Your whole body arched into him as the wave overtook you, your core tightly clenched around him, every muscle in your body tense, your legs trembling. Soft cries falling from your lips as Joel held you through it, whispering your name like a prayer.

A few moments later, you felt him follow, his body tensing beneath you, his grip on your hips tightening as a groan ripped through his chest, filling you up, bursting everything into you, every last drop. He buried his face in your neck, his breath hot and ragged.

And then… stillness.

Just your heartbeats. Your sweat-slick skin pressed together. Your fingers tangled in his hair. The mix of yours and Joel's liquid running from your swollen core, down to his veiny dick.

You didn’t say a word. Neither did he. But in the silence, the weight of what you’d just done settled between you. And somehow… it made everything feel even heavier.

You were both breathless, struggling to steady your breathing. Joel still had his arms wrapped around you tightly, his chest rising and falling against yours. You were so small compared to him, his body practically enveloped yours, his hairy arms covering almost all of your bare back like a shield.

It felt safe. Too safe.

And that’s what made it all feel so fucking wrong.

Once your senses slowly returned and you regained enough strength, you gently peeled yourself away from him. Both of you exhaled, a strange mix of relief and discomfort, as the cool air hit your naked skin. You laid back down next to him, eyes fixed on the wall, pulling the blanket up to your shoulders like it could hide you from the guilt that was already swallowing you whole.

You fucked everything up.

Tomorrow, you were supposed to get married. To Ted. Sweet, steady Ted who would never hurt you. And yet here you were—naked, breathless, and sore in your ex’s bed.

Just a week ago, you’d looked into Ted’s eyes and promised him nothing would happen. That Joel was the past. A closed chapter. That you didn’t feel anything for him anymore.

But then you kissed him. You started it. You wanted it.

This wasn’t Joel’s fault. It was yours. Every goddamn bit of it. It was your idea to get married in Jackson. Your idea to let Joel crash in the same bed with you. Your idea to close that tiny distance and press your lips to his like it meant nothing. You ruined everything over one stupid fight.

Joel could feel the shift in the air. He watched the way your eyes darted back and forth, your silence louder than anything you could have said. The slight shimmer at the corners of your eyes didn’t go unnoticed either, and that was when he knew.

This wasn’t good.

“You okay?” he asked, his voice rough but gentle.

You pressed your lips into a thin, unreadable line and gave a small nod. He didn’t buy it. Not even for a second.

“Do you wanna talk about it?”

You shook your head, too afraid that if you opened your mouth, your voice would crack under the weight of everything crashing inside you. Talking meant facing it. Naming it. And you weren’t ready for that.

Joel felt awful. Helpless. He knew it wasn’t really his fault, but that didn’t stop the guilt from creeping in. He could’ve stopped it. Could’ve said no. Could’ve pulled away. But he didn’t. Because the truth was, the need to feel you again had drowned all logic.

But now? Seeing you like this—silent, curled in on yourself, barely holding it together—it broke him.

He wanted to reach out. Hold you. Kiss your forehead. Say something. But he didn’t dare. He was terrified you’d push him away. And after losing you once already, he didn’t think he could survive it again.

The room was quiet. Only your breathing and the faint, chaotic rhythm of your hearts filled the space between you. And then-

“The wedding—”

“I don’t know, Joel,” you snapped, voice cracking as your hands slammed against your face. “I don’t fucking know. I just ruined everything.”

Silence.

Then a soft breath from Joel and one word, quietly, almost painfully, murmured under his breath.

“…Yeah.”

You both laid there in silence. The kind of silence that weighs heavy on your chest, like the air itself knew what you did.

Guilt clung to your skin like sweat. Wrapped around your limbs like a chain. And yet… neither of you moved. Neither of you spoke. Neither of you said sorry.

Because the truth was, you didn’t regret it. Neither did he. You should have. God knows you should have. But you didn’t.

Because the want was still there. The need. Because somewhere deep down, in places you tried to bury long ago, you still wanted him, and he still wanted you.

Whether you’d ever face it or not, something between you was still burning.

Quiet. Dangerous. Alive.

And it wasn’t going out anytime soon.

Phew, thank you so much for reading! I know this was hella long again, but honestly, writing something short is a miracle for me😝

Still, I’d love to hear any feedback—whether it’s a comment, a reblog, or anything else!

If you’d like to be tagged in my future fics, don’t hesitate to let me know! Same goes if you have any ideas or would like to see another chapter!

Wishing you a lovely day

Love u!🌸💗

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a-d-nox · 4 months ago

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how can you glow up: your 7h - relationships and balance within them

still following my hypothesis of how you can glow up using your venus persona? it's time to take a closer look at your 7h!

paid reading options: astrology menu & cartomancy menu

enjoy my work? help me continue creating by tipping on ko-fi or paypal. your support keeps the magic alive!

7h aries (1°, 13°, 25°), 7h mars, and/or mars aspecting 7h ruler

setting and maintaining healthy boundaries

avoid asserting dominance: being direct is fine, but ensure your heard and understood shouldn't mean overpowering your partner’s needs.

balance independence with being a team: i know you value your freedom, but healthy relationships require mutual consideration and everyone's favorite word *compromise*.

don’t rush into commitment: often this energy can led towards being impulsive - take your time to evaluate whether any relationship you enter aligns with your long-term needs.

recognize when conflict is unnecessary: not every disagreement has to be a fight - learn to pick your battles wisely.

how to improve communication

express your desires without aggression: your passion is your strength, but delivery matters; approach every conversation with clarity, not force.

practice active listening (and patience): "aries goes first" - not necessarily... let your partner fully express themselves before you respond; avoid interrupting out of impatience.

be mindful of reactive tendencies: slow down before responding to avoid saying things in the heat of the moment that you might come to regret.

embrace vulnerability: not every conversation has to be a debate - sharing emotions openly builds deeper connections.

how to attract balanced partnerships

seek partners who match your energy but also ground you: a mix of excitement and stability creates the healthiest dynamic.

avoid overly passive partners: you need someone who can keep up with you, not someone who lets you full on take control of every situation.

seek relationships built on mutual passion and respect: you thrive in partnerships where both people are equally invested and independent.

be open to different love styles: just because someone expresses love differently than you do doesn’t mean they are less devoted.

how to become more confident in relationships

own your assertiveness: you know what you want, and that’s powerful - your confidence will come when you embrace this without fearing this power will ruin your relationships (that being said balance assertiveness with control (don't succumb to being overly controlling within your relationships)).

let go of the need to prove yourself: you don’t need to be “the best” in/at relationships; love isn’t a competition.

trust that the right person won’t see your fire as “too much”: your intensity will be attractive when matched with the right person.

learn to identify what you deserve

relationships where you feel free yet supported: you need both your autonomy and a deep connection.

a partner who values your drive, not one who competes with you or tries to put you down: someone who encourages your ambitions rather than challenges your authority.

excitement without unnecessary chaos/fights/argument: love can be passionate and spontaneous without being dramatic or unstable.

a partner who respects your strength but also sees your softer side and knows when to support you: emotional security is just as important as adventure.

7h gemini (3°, 15°, 27°), 7h mercury, and/or mercury aspecting 7h ruler

setting and maintaining healthy boundaries

avoid superficial connections: it’s likely very easy for you to keep things light, but deeper emotions/conversations are necessary for real intimacy.

balance social time with personal time: you thrive on interaction, but ensure you’re not overextending yourself in relationships.

set limits: make sure both you and your partner respect each other.

be clear about your expectations: ambiguity can lead to misunderstandings, so express your needs openly and directly.

how to improve communication

be mindful of overanalyzing: not every conversation needs to be dissected.

avoid deflecting with humor or distraction: playfulness is one thing, but true communication requires depth and honesty. so focus and try to read the room.

practice active listening: immerse yourself fully instead of thinking about your response.

express your emotions clearly: love isn’t just about words - allow yourself to feel your emotions, not just explain them.

how to attract balanced partnerships

look for partners who stimulate your mind but ground you: lntellectual chemistry is key for you, but emotional security is equally important.

avoid partners who are too rigid or overly possessive: you need freedom given this airy influence to explore ideas and connections without feeling confined.

choose relationships that allow for variety and spontaneity: routine-driven partner may not suit you long term.

look for someone who communicates: these people's relationships thrive when both partners are curious, expressive, and engaged.

how to become more confident in relationships

own your adaptability: your ability to see different perspectives makes you a dynamic and engaging partner - you are anything but boring. know that.

trust that depth doesn’t mean loss of autonomy: real intimacy can exist alongside independence and exploration. just because you feel locked in doesn't mean you aren't your own person.

commitment doesn’t equal monotony: long-term relationships can still be exciting and full of surprises especially if you are with the right person.

learn to identify what you deserve

communication and mental connection: deep conversations and shared curiosity keep your love alive - there is nothing wrong with that.

freedom to explore: you deserve space to express yourself without feeling boxed in.

someone who understands and embraces your duality: you deserve a partner who appreciates both your playful and serious sides.

7h cancer (4°, 16°, 28°), 7h moon, and/or moon aspecting 7h ruler

setting and maintaining healthy boundaries

recognize emotional enmeshment: your relationships may feel deeply personal, but ensure you’re not absorbing your partner’s emotions as your own.

avoid mood-based decisions: your emotional status influences how you approach relationships, so take time/space before making major commitments.

separate past wounds from present situations: your attachment style will be shaped by past experiences, so aim to heal (or learn coping techniques for) any unresolved emotional patterns prior to relationships if possible.

how to improve communication

express emotions without fear: emotions are strength; don’t suppress them to "keep the peace".

avoid passive-aggressive tendencies: if something bothers you, say so instead of expecting your partner to guess at your feelings.

communicate beyond emotions: all feelings are valid, however, logical discussions are also necessary for resolving conflicts effectively.

recognize emotional triggers: be mindful of how past wounds and insecurities influence your reactions. make your partner aware of these potential triggers.

how to attract balanced partnerships

seek emotionally mature partners: you need someone who understands deep emotional connections and at the same time doesn’t rely on you for all their emotional needs.

look for nurturing but independent partners: a healthy relationship supports emotional depth while allowing for both partners to maintain their own identities.

how to become more confident in relationships

trust your intuition: your emotional intelligence helps you read people well - don’t second-guess yourself. "a spade is a spade".

embrace vulnerability without fearing rejection: the right person will appreciate your emotional openness rather than see it as weakness.

learn to self-soothe rather than seeking constant reassurance: trust yourself to navigate tough emotions independently.

learn to identify what you deserve

someone who respects and values emotional depth: you need someone who embraces emotional intimacy, not someone who avoids it.

a safe space to express feelings without judgment: emotional security should be number one in your relationships.

7h aquarius (12°, 24°), 7h uranus, and/or uranus aspecting 7h ruler

setting and maintaining healthy boundaries

allow for freedom without creating distance: you value independence, but emotional closeness is just as important.

avoid impulsive decisions: the urge to seek (or create it if you get too bored) excitement may lead to relationship instability, so take time before making major decisions.

define what “commitment” means to you: you definition may be unconventional to say the least, so ensure you and your partner are on the same page.

balance personal space with connection: too much distance can create instability in relationships, so maintain open communication at all times if you can't be in each other's space.

how to improve communication

be clear about your need for independence: your partner should understand that love for you doesn’t mean constant togetherness.

avoid being emotionally detached: deep emotional discussions are essential for intimacy - i know i know that's likely tough to swallow for logic loving aquarius.

recognize when you’re being obstinate just because: not every disagreement needs to be a challenge for authority...

how to attract balanced partnerships

seek partners who enjoy change and excitement: you need a dynamic relationship that allow room for growth and new experiences.

avoid overly controlling or possessive partners: you need both respect and autonomy - make that very clear.

look for intellectual and energetic chemistry: mental stimulation and shared passions are essential to holding your interest.

how to become more confident in relationships

own your uniqueness: your unconventional approach to relationships is a strength, not a flaw. love is changing in today's world and you are well suited to step into this new romantic era.

stability doesn’t mean boredom: you can have a committed, fulfilling relationship without sacrificing your excitement for life.

find confidence in flexibility: your adaptability allows you to thrive in various relationship dynamics without fear.

learn to identify what you deserve

someone who appreciates your unpredictability rather attempts to tame you: you deserve someone who enjoys change and spontaneity - they will complement you well.

excitement without chaos: you deserve a love that is thrilling but also emotionally secure.

mutual respect in an unconventional relationship dynamic: whether it’s non-traditional roles, unique ways of expressing love, or alternative commitments (open relationships, polyamory, long-distance, etc.), you need a partner who understands and/or is willing to try your approach.

7h ruler in 1h

setting and maintaining healthy boundaries

avoid losing yourself in relationships: your identity can easily get deeply tied to partnerships, so make sure you maintain your individuality and fight against codependency.

set clear expectations from the start: your relationships will impact your self-image; make suee they align with your values and needs.

balance personal desires with relationship dynamics: avoid over-prioritizing your partner’s needs at the expense of your own.

how to improve communication

be direct about your needs: relationships influence your sense of self so have clear and honest communication to prevent misunderstandings.

self-reflect before reacting: your responses in relationships can be immediate and personal; take time and space to process emotions.

make sure conversations are 50/50: since you likely take the lead, make sure you are allowing space for your partner’s thoughts and perspective.

speak from personal experience, don't make assumptions: avoid projecting your thoughts and beliefs in the relationship; focus on understanding both yourself and them.

how to attract balanced partnerships

look for partners who complement you rather than define you: a good partner will enhance your identity, not "wash you out".

avoid overly dominant or passive partners: you thrive in relationships where you both stand strong.

seek someone who values your independence: a partner who respects you as an individual creates a more overall fulfilling relationship dynamic.

how to become more confident in relationships

embrace self-sufficiency: you don’t need a relationship to feel whole; your strength lies in your own identity. love with come when you aren't looking for it.

recognize that relationships reflect your personal growth: how you engage with others mirrors your self-awareness and growth.

by empowered by love, not dependent on it: partnerships should support your autonomy rather than diminish it.

learn to identify what you deserve

you should be valued and respected: you need a partnership that acknowledges and respects your individuality.

partners who inspire self-growth and confidence: relationships should encourage your personal development rather than limits it.

love is a choice, not a chore: you deserve a partnership where both you and them choose one another, not out of need but out of genuine connection.

have ideas for new content? please use my “suggest a post topic” button!

return to nox’s guide to metaphysics

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#astrology #astro community #astro placements #astro chart #natal chart #astrology tumblr #persona chart #astro notes #natal astrology #astrology readings #astrology signs #astrology chart #astro #astro observations #astroblr #venus persona #venus persona chart

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ferrarifudds · 3 months ago

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The Night We Met. ✷ Paige Bueckers

Pairing: Paige Bueckers x Fem!reader

Summary: When your night out doesn’t go to plan because of man (Smh) and you find yourself seeking help from a stranger.

Word Count: 1.1k words

Disclaimer/s: idk i was just geeked writing this. Hi Paige.

Vera’s Voice! IIIIII OKAAYYYY. IM GAY IM GAY IM GAY hello! im stressed. love u. Go Huskies. RAAAAHHGG , enjoy!!!! i was also just. Ysah. Alr just vote.

The bar was suffocating—too many bodies pressed together, the bass from the speakers rattling the floor, the air thick with alcohol and sweat. You had only come because your friends had begged you, promising a fun night out.

Yet now, as you stood alone and abandoned near the counter, nursing your half-melted cocktail, you wished you had just stayed home.

Especially because of him.

You felt the guy before you even saw him, the way his presence loomed too close, his cologne too strong.

"Hey," He drawled, sliding up beside you. His grin was lazy, the kind that came with one too many drinks and a false sense of confidence. "Haven't seen you around here before."

You barely glanced up, taking a small step away. "Yeah, I don't come here much."

"Shame," He said, leaning against the bar. "A girl like you? Bet you turn heads everywhere you go."

You internally cringed, fingers tightening around your glass. "No. Not really."

Like can he go away..

His chuckle was low, edged with something that made you uneasy. "C'mon, don't be shy. What’s your name?"

You shook your head, uninterested. "I don't think that matters."

His expression flickered, his eyes scanning over your outfit—a black off the shoulder top and a denim skirt that hugged your figure with knee high black leather boots that elongated your legs.

It wasn’t overly revealing one bit, it was classy, chic… casual… but the way he looked at you made you regret wearing it.

"Playing hard to get, hm?" He mused, taking a slow sip of his beer. "I like a challenge."

Your stomach churned. You glanced around, searching for your friends, but they were nowhere in sight.

"I’m not playing anything," You said flatly, shifting again, but he only closed the space.

"You here alone?" His tone was too casual.

You forced a smile, one that didn’t reach your eyes. "No. I'm with someone."

Which wasn’t necessary a lie!! You were waiting around for your friends.

But where the fuck were they.

His grin widened, as if you had just given him permission. "Lucky them."

Your pulse ticked up, discomfort settling in.

Then, his hand brushed against your wrist.

Not harsh, not aggressive, but enough to make you freeze.

"Let me buy you a drink," he said smoothly, tilting his head. "One drink, and if you’re still not interested, I’ll leave you alone."

You had a nearly empty drink. You held it up pointedly. "I’m good, thanks."

He scoffed, shaking his head. "Damn, you’re really making me work for it, huh?"

And of course, your patience finally snapped.

"Take the hint, dude," You said, louder this time, your voice sharper.

"I have a girlfriend."

A lie.

And before you could process what you were even doing..

You latched onto the nearest person passing by.

Her.

The tall blonde girl who had actually been eyeing you all night.

She had noticed you the second you walked in—how could she not? You looked effortlessly stunning, the dim lighting of the bar catching against your skin just right, your outfit screaming elegance.

This blonde in particular wasn’t usually the type to stare either, but something about you had captivated her.

So, when you suddenly turned to her, wide-eyed and desperate, she didn’t hesitate.

She knew what she needed to do.

"There you are—I’ve been looking for you," She murmured, slipping an arm around your waist, pulling your back flush against her with a protective demeanor.

Her voice was smooth, so effortlessly natural, like she had done this a million times before.

You barely had time to react—because damn, she smelled good. Something fresh, a little expensive, mixed with the faintest trace of whatever cologne she had on.

The guy stiffened. His eyes flickered between the two of you, like he was trying to process it. "Oh, I didn’t—"

"Yeah," She cut in smoothly. "I bet you didn’t."

You swallowed hard, your heart racing for a whole new reason.

The guy hesitated, looking like he wanted to argue, but she only tightened her grip on your waist, the hug from behind not leaving anytime soon.

"He bothering you, baby?," She asked, you felt her looking down at you.

“He is.” You nod without glancing back at her. Your hands clasped around hers where she held you.

The tall and blonde stranger glanced at the man who had been bothering you, a scoff escaping her lips. "Yeah, I’d take the hint if I were you.” A crooked grin on her lips as her grip around you tightened.

Something in her voice—calm, but firm—made the guy back down. He exhaled sharply, muttered something under his breath, and turned, disappearing into the crowd.

The second he was gone, your entire body sagged in relief.

"God," You muttered, your hands still clinging to her arms.

"You good?" She asked, turning you around so she could see your front. Her voice was lighter now, but her touch didn’t waver.

You finally got a better look at her, and—like.. wow.

Wow.

You had grabbed onto a stranger, yes, but somehow, you had picked the hottest one in the room.

She was dressed well—a white crop top that showed her midriff, paired underneath an unbuttoned black shirt and baggy realtree camo pants. A chain peeked over her undershirt, catching the light every time she moved and she had that easy confidence about her, like she knew exactly what she was doing.

And you were so in trouble.

"I—uh, yeah," You stammered, blinking rapidly.

She smirked, tilting her head. "So, do you always grab random women and claim them as your girlfriend, or am I just lucky?"

You flushed. "You were just the closest."

She hummed, unconvinced, her eyes slowly dragging over you, taking her time. "Lucky me, then."

Your stomach flipped.

You forced yourself to focus. "Sorry for, uh, grabbing you like that."

She shrugged, looking way too pleased. "No complaints here, really."

Her grip still hadn’t let go.

Your pulse spiked as you realized—her fingers were still resting against your waist, her thumb brushing over the fabric of your top absentmindedly.

The touch was barely there. But it was enough to make you insanely aware of her.

She smirked. "So, can I get my girlfriend a drink, then?"

Your stomach twisted again in the best possible way.

You bit your lip, fighting a smile.

"I guess it’s only fair." You shrugged. “And can I possibly get my girlfriend’s name?” You played along, the grin on your lips wider than ever.

“Paige.” She replied looking down at you.

And judging by the way her smirk deepened, she definitely knew what she was doing.

Yup, you were safe.

likes, comments, & reblogs are appreciated! ^_^ and pls Lmk if you wanna be apart of my permanent tag list

tags! @halfwayhearted @pedriache @wdcbox

#paige bueckers #paige bueckers wbb #paige bueckers uconn #paige bueckers x yn #paige bueckers x reader #paige bueckers fluff #paige bueckers x female reader #paige bueckers x y/n #paige bueckers x you #paige bueckers oneshot #paige bueckers imagine #pb5 #uconn wbb #wbb #paige buckets

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lynnlovesthestars · 1 year ago

Note

Could I request headcanons for Harleep, Astarion, Gale, Wyll, Halsin, Dammon, Rolan, and Zevlor with kind and patient gn s/o? This is quite self-indulgent of me because I have been told I'm too nice & so patient so I'm curious how they would react XD

first of all sorry for being so late, but my small brain has to process things multiple times to make sense, so i wrote this like... 5 times? So it takes me a while, but i hope that waiting was worth it.

Also i saw you sent a second ask to see if i recieved this one, so ill put dammon and rolan there cause this is starting to get a bit long:3<3 thank you so much for your patience!:3

Taglist: @sessils @spacebarbarianweird

Headcanon: BG3 men with kind and patient s/o. (pt. 1)

Zevlor:

Zevlor is emotionally a wreck already, he considers kindness a virtue and it definitely makes him swoon when he notices you put extra care in making sure he's treated with kindness. At the end of the day, he basically got bullied on all fronts when all he really wants is to prove himself worthy of the title he carried for so long.

Zevlor has a short temper too, and he appreciates so much your effort and patience in dealing with his outbursts, whether they are of rage- not towards you of course- or of sadness, you offer always a shoulder for him and he cherishes it so much.

He is lowkey jealous when he notices that your kindness is not mostly exclusive to him, he has learned that people can abuse one's patience and care, and 1. he doesn't want you to get hurt, 2. he wishes your kindness was maybe reserved to him. Call him selfish, but after being deprived of it for so long, he is hesitant to let go of it.

Astarion:

Initially he would be very wary, in his experience being nice always lead to him getting hurt, so why would he trust someone who's default reply is kindness? At the end of the day the last time someone was '''''kind''''' to him, he was turned in a vampire spawn, so he takes it extra slow, he has just regained control over himself, he won't blindly accept kindness. He's lowkey afraid you are just part of a bigger scheme that will bite him in the ass and leave him shackled and caged again.

Once he gets accustomed to your kindness and finally accepts it, he revels in the kindness you offer and your patience, especially the smallest gestures like opening a door for him. He will literally melt for it, he's already smitten, your kindness leaves him like mush in your hands.

Nevetheless every good side, comes with a negative one. He is dead afraid your kindness will bring you to get hurt. He often reminds you to be weary and keep all your kindness for people you trust (HIM), rather than going around and helping every lost soul that asks for help. He will fight you on this a few times- especially if you do get hurt or it is obvious you are about to- he will not bite his tongue and keep it for himself, and that's one of the moments when he's glad you are patient.

You understand where it comes from and you try your best to find a solution that would make both happy. Your patience of course doesn't stop there, he knows he's an handful: he carries an heavy trauma baggage and he has a feisty personality, yet you always show him you don't mind, that you are there for him and that he can take all the time of the universe to sort his problems out.

Wyll:

Wyll would find it so endearing, how you are ready to go to someone's aid, you stop on your tracks to support someone in need, and he would love seeing you being kind to everyone. It's probably one of the reasons why he falls in love with you. Unlike Astarion he encourages you to be kind to everyone, cause he considers it a virtue, he incourages you to be the best version of yourself, and he reminds you that if you do get hurt, he will be there to pick up the pieces.

As far as patience goes, he's grateful to the moon and back, he knows he is an handful, especially if he doesn't break his pact with Mizora and has to leave more times than ever. He makes sure once he's back though that he makes up for lost time, whether it is with gifts or by taking care of you.

Haarlep:

Harleep is so used to Raphael that honestly he's taken aback at first, living in the hells means that kindness is hard to come by and around Raphael? It's either a trick or a miracle, so he brushes it off, not repelled like Astarion would, but definitely not eager like Wyll either.. he would be probably the one that takes it as it is, just.. that. But when he gets used to it? He becomes unsufferable. So unsufferable that he goes around demanding Raphael to be treated with kindness and patience! He purrs whenever you are nice even the smallest, thanking you and praising you like a goddess. He even tries to be nice himself- to you only- and despite it has to be and effort, since he has never been exposed to much kindness, he does become a little more mindful, even asking before taking your form or just with small acts of services.

One time Rapahel makes sure to send a message to you through him. "Tav, Raphael asked you stop being nice to me, cause if i demand it from him as well, he's going to turn me into fertilizer", message delivered with a pout that begs exactly the opposite.

Harleep is another that is deeply afraid of your kindness. Let's be real, you can defend yourself as much as you want, but people tend to use people and your kindness is one of those characteristics evil people would pry on- he knows well since its literally part of what he does, and a facet of what Raphael does as well. He probably scolds you a lot for this reason, he does it in a sweet way- don't get me wrong- he sugarcoats the shit out of it, but he will let you know when you are about to get in peril or you are too careless with your kindness.

Gale:

Gale is touched by your kindness, already from the first days after meeting him.

You had helped him out of his blotched portal, you fed him artifacts, you didn't question his secrets or push him to reveal anything, and he doesn't give that for granted. Once he's closer to you, and he learns that you are unconditionally kind to everyone, he's scared.

He starts warning you to be a little less nice, to use your judgement before you blindly trust a stranger, but he doesn't push it past a warning. As much as he wants to protect you, he doesn't want to take away your chance to grow from your errors.

In matter of your patience he's so grateful, he spends days thanking you when he's still afflicted with the orb condition, he cooks as a form of apology or thanks depending what he did, he gets baths started for you, he's treating you as a queen/ king. He alread would do it, but with you? He's even more protective, he almost feels like he has to match your kindness and patience with as much attentions he can muster.

Halsin:

Halsin is a fair man you think he wishes everyone was kind, but he actually wants you to be fair, he wants you to be mindful of who you give kindness to, he wants you to be a reasonable judge rather than unconditionally nice cause it is the way of the nature as well. Nature is not only nurturing and lush, it's also the poisonous vipers and herbs.

Does he appreciate when you are kind? Absolutely, he thinks it's the best gift Silvanus has ever bestowed him, but it doesn't take away the fact that he wants you to be treated kindly as well, so the moment someone crosses the line and starts abusing your kindness or becomes rude, he's definitely stepping in to s h a m e the other person. "You are lucky you have met Tav, cause they are kind, but nature wouldn't be so understanding and patient" He says it with a rage you rarely see in his eyes.

He will do his best to remind you to surely practice kindness but also to be mindful who you help and who you are kind to, cause there's always rotten that can harm you, and lowkey if you get hurt he will invite you to take back what you gave.

Despite this Halsin considers kindness the bare minimum a person should be, and what stops him from encouraging you to be kinder, its just the knowledge that you might get hurt.

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gyu-tori · 4 months ago

Text

Guard My Heart | C.YJ

⟢ Pairing: idol!yeonjun x bodyguard fem!reader ⟢ Genre: Fluff, Light Angst, Comedy ⟢ Warnings:: sasaeng encounter, mentions of a knife, might've missed something

Summary: Yeonjun was supposed to be just another assignment—another idol to guard, another job to do. But from the moment you meet, he makes it his personal mission to get under your skin. With his endless teasing, late-night antics, and shameless need for attention, he tests your patience at every turn. No matter how much you try to keep things professional, he just won’t let up. But somewhere between playful bickering, stolen snacks, and texts that definitely aren’t work-related, you start to wonder… Who’s really guarding who?

⟢ Word count: 6.3k

You expected your new assignment to be difficult.

After all, guarding a top idol—especially one as famous as Choi Yeonjun—was never going to be easy. Fans could be unpredictable, the media relentless, and sasaengs downright dangerous. But you had handled tough clients before. You were trained for this.

What you weren’t expecting was this.

Yeonjun, sitting across from you in the HYBE conference room, arms folded, lips pursed in barely concealed dissatisfaction. His bright red hair catches the fluorescent light, making him look even more dramatic as he narrows his eyes at you.

“This is a joke, right? This is my new bodyguard?” he asks, voice laced with amusement. His sharp eyes scan you from head to toe, analyzing, testing. His lips twitch like he’s holding back laughter.

You don’t react.

“No offense,” he continues, looking you up and down. “But you’re... you know. Small.”

Still, you don’t react.

Yeonjun leans forward, elbows on the table, clearly testing. “Are you even qualified?”

You blink at him. “Try me.”

For a split second, surprise flashes across his face. Then, to your dismay, his lips curl into a grin.

“Oh, I like you already,” he muses, eyes twinkling with mischief.

You resist the urge to sigh. This is going to be a long assignment.

The manager clears his throat. “Choi Yeonjun, this is Y/N. She’ll be assigned to you for the duration of your solo promotions. Given the increase in sasaeng activity, HYBE has decided that personal security for solo schedules is a priority.”

“Right,” Yeonjun hums, leaning back. “So what, she’s gonna follow me around all the time?”

“Yes,” you reply before the manager can. “I’ll be present at all your schedules, guarding your exits, and ensuring your safety. I’ll also be stationed a few floors below your dorm for emergencies.”

Yeonjun raises an eyebrow, looking almost impressed by your no-nonsense tone.

“So you’re really serious about this, huh?”

You don’t answer.

Yeonjun exhales, shaking his head. “Alright, alright. Let’s set some ground rules then, shall we?”

You nod, waiting.

“One,” he holds up a finger. “No invading my personal space.”

You blink. “That depends. If someone lunges at you, do you want me to ask for permission first?”

He chuckles. “Okay, fair. But if I want to, I don’t know, get some late-night food, you’re not gonna be a buzzkill about it, right?”

You meet his gaze. “For your safety, here’s how this is going to work,” you say, arms crossed as you brief him and his manager. “You will not go anywhere without me. No sneaking off, no last-minute changes in schedule, and absolutely no ditching security.”

Yeonjun hums thoughtfully, tilting his head. “So you’re basically my shadow now?”

“Yes,” you confirm. “You will contact me if anything feels off. Only if something feels wrong. Understood?”

He pouts dramatically. “No fun.”

“This isn’t about fun,” you reply, deadpan. “It’s about safety.”

His eyes gleam with mischief. “We’ll see.”

Yeonjun doesn’t waste any time.

The moment your official duties begin, he takes it upon himself to make them as insufferable as possible.

It starts small.

He walks too fast, then too slow.

You keep pace effortlessly, adjusting without complaint.

Then he fake trips.

You don’t react.

He catches himself—gracefully, of course—and glances at you expectantly, waiting for some sort of acknowledgment.

Nothing.

The corner of his mouth twitches. “You weren’t even gonna try to catch me?”

You adjust the earpiece in your ear, still walking. “If you fall and crack your head, I am not responsible.”

Yeonjun grins. “She speaks!”

You give him a sidelong glance. “Only when necessary.”

He grins. “Good to know.”

For the rest of the afternoon, he keeps trying.

He pretends to get lost inside the HYBE building, just to see if you’ll panic, you don’t.

He “accidentally” walks into the wrong dressing room before a shoot ,you yank him out by the hood.

He even tries to make you laugh by doing ridiculous dances in the hallway.

Nothing works. But he’s determined.

Later that night, you’re posted near the dorm elevator when you catch movement out of the corner of your eye.

You don’t have to turn your head to know exactly who it is.

Choi Yeonjun, dressed in all black like a wannabe spy, creeping toward the doors like he isn’t being completely obvious.

You wait until his finger hovers over the elevator button before speaking.

“If you press that button, I will escort you back to your dorm immediately.”

Yeonjun jumps slightly, spinning around.

“You are way too quiet,” he complains, clutching his chest dramatically.

You cross your arms. “And you are way too obvious.”

He sighs, shaking his head. “C’mon, miss bodyguard. I’m just getting snacks.”

You raise an eyebrow. “Alone?”

His lips twitch. “Guess you’ll just have to come with me.”

You exhale through your nose, weighing your options. It’s not technically a high-risk situation. The building is secure. He’s wearing a mask and cap.

“…Fine.”

Yeonjun’s eyes light up like he’s just won the lottery.

Minutes later, you find yourselves on a rooftop, a plastic bag of snacks between you. The city glows below, the hum of distant traffic filling the silence.

For the first time since meeting him, Yeonjun isn’t talking.

And strangely, it isn’t uncomfortable.

You don’t say anything either, letting the quiet settle between you.

Eventually, Yeonjun breaks the silence with a hum of amusement.

“You know,” he muses, tearing open a bag of chips, “you don’t hate me as much as you pretend to.”

You glance at him. “I never said I hated you.”

He tilts his head, studying you with an unreadable expression. “No, but you try really hard to act like you don’t care.”

You don’t respond. Yeonjun doesn’t push.

After escorting him on his late night escapade and heading back to your respective dorms, your phone vibrates.

Yeonjun: I kinda bought too many snacks, want some?You: Go to sleep.Yeonjun: A simple ‘yes’ or ‘no’ would sufficeYou: No.Yeonjun: LiarrrrYou: Goodnight.

You stare at the screen for a moment before shaking your head, tossing the phone onto your nightstand.

This job is going to be exhausting.

The next few days, Yeonjun seems to make it his personal mission to get under your skin.

It starts with little things.

When walking ahead of you, he suddenly slows down—forcing you to either walk beside him or come to an awkward halt.

When you side-step to keep your usual position behind him, he mirrors you, making it obvious that he’s doing it on purpose.

You ignore it.

Then, he starts talking.

“Why are you always so serious?” he asks one morning on the way to a recording.

You don’t answer immediately.

“Why are you always talking?” you counter after a beat.

Yeonjun grins, as if pleased that you responded at all. “Because I want to know what makes you tick.”

You give him nothing.

He leans in slightly. “Are you secretly in love with me?”

You don’t even blink. “Are you secretly incapable of shutting up?”

Beomgyu, who’s been watching from the side, nearly chokes on his water.

Yeonjun gapes at you before breaking into a wide grin. “Oh, you’re good.”

You roll your eyes and walk ahead.

He follows, laughing to himself. He’s definitely going to crack you.

“Honestly, at this point, you two might as well just start dating,” Beomgyu teases one afternoon.

You’re in the practice room, watching the members rehearse.

Yeonjun, who’s taking a water break, wipes sweat from his brow and smirks. “Honey, what do you think?”

He looks right at you.

You meet his gaze with a deadpan expression. “Sure , but I get half your paycheck.”

Soobin spits out his drink.

Taehyun straight-up claps.

Beomgyu gasps in delight. “Wait—she’s kind of scary. I like her.”

Yeonjun… turns red.

“Oh my god,” Kai laughs, pointing. “He’s actually blushing.”

“Shut up,” Yeonjun grumbles, but the tips of his ears are undeniably pink.

Later that night, your phone vibrates.

Yeonjun: So do you want it in cash or bank transfer?You: Stop texting me.Yeonjun: That’s not a no.

You toss your phone aside.

This man is exhausting.

And yet, a tiny—dangerous—part of you is starting to find it entertaining.

It happens a few days later.

Yeonjun is mid-conversation with a staff member when he catches himself watching you.

The way you quietly scan the crowd at the filming site. The way your head tilts slightly when you’re focused. The way your fingers tap against your leg, subtle but rhythmic, like a habit.

Why am I noticing these things?

He shakes himself out of it, forcing himself back into the conversation.

It’s nothing.

Just curiosity.

Right?

It’s after a music show recording when it happens.

Another male idol—someone from another group—sidles up to you while you’re standing near the dressing room entrance.

“Hey, you’re Yeonjun’s bodyguard, right?” he asks, leaning in slightly. “That’s kinda cool.”

You don’t react. “Can I help you?”

The idol grins. “Just wondering if you’re off-duty later. Maybe we could—”

A hand lands on your shoulder.

Yeonjun.

“She’s with me,” he says smoothly, his arm sliding around you with practiced ease.

The idol blinks. “Oh. My bad, man—”

Yeonjun just smiles, a little too sharp. “No worries.”

The moment the guy walks away, you step out of Yeonjun’s grasp, crossing your arms.

“What was that?”

He shrugs. “Just making sure you weren’t uncomfortable.”

You study him for a moment before shaking your head. “You’re weird.”

Yeonjun just grins.

Later that night—

Yeonjun: I was pretty cool today, huh?You: No.Yeonjun: LiesssssYeonjun: Hey, random question…You: What?Yeonjun: If I was kidnapped, would you pay the ransom to rescue me?You: That depends. How much are they asking for?Yeonjun: ???You: If it’s less than my monthly salary, then no.Yeonjun: That’s so cold. I thought we were getting closer.You: This is a professional relationship.Yeonjun: I professionally think you have a nice face.You: Block.

Yeonjun laughs, tossing his phone onto his bed.

This is definitely going to be fun.

You should’ve seen it coming.

Yeonjun has been running on fumes for days—back-to-back schedules, late-night practices, barely any sleep. His body was bound to give out eventually.

Still, when you walk into the dorm and find him curled up on the couch like a half-dead sloth, it’s… unsettling.

“Are you dying?” you ask flatly, setting your bag down.

Yeonjun groans, burying his face deeper into the blanket draped over his head. “Feels like it.” His voice is hoarse, thick with congestion. “Can’t move. Just leave me here. Tell my fans I love them.”

You roll your eyes.

“Did you take medicine?”

A vague grunt.

“Did you eat?”

Another grunt.

You pinch the bridge of your nose. “I swear to god—”

He groans again, more dramatic this time. “I can’t eat. My throat hurts. I’m weak. Frail. Delicate.”

You sigh and disappear into the kitchen.

A few minutes later, you return with a steaming cup of tea and place it on the table in front of him. “Drink.”

Yeonjun cracks one eye open. “You made me tea?”

“I am contractually obligated to keep you alive,” you deadpan.

He smirks weakly. “You care about me.”

You shove the tea closer. “Drink it before I pour it on your head.”

Yeonjun chuckles but obeys, taking a slow sip. His eyes slip shut as he swallows. “Damn. That’s actually good.”

You cross your arms. “Maybe if you start listening to me like a good patient, you’ll recover faster.”

He peeks up at you with a lopsided grin. “You sound like my mom.”

Without missing a beat, you fire back, “Then start listening to me like a good son.”

For a moment, Yeonjun just blinks at you.

A slow, mischievous smirk spreads across his lips.

“Oooh,” he hums, voice teasing. “You have a mommy kink?”

You shove the tea back into his hands so fast he nearly spills it.

“Drink.”

He laughs through his coughs but does as he’s told.

Later when you leave his dorm, he’s already buzzing your phone.

Yeonjun: So when do I get more tea from my mommy? You: Never texting you again.

It starts as a joke.

You’re standing at the edge of the practice room, watching Yeonjun go through his choreography for an upcoming performance. He moves with effortless precision—fluid, controlled, and stupidly good at what he does.

After a final spin, he shoots you a look through the mirror.

“You should try it.”

You scoff. “I’m your bodyguard, not a backup dancer.”

Yeonjun grins, stepping toward you. “C’mon. Just one move. Super simple.”

“I don’t—”

Before you can finish, he’s grabbing your wrist, tugging you into the center of the room.

“Just follow my lead.”

You sigh, resigning yourself to whatever nonsense this is.

Yeonjun demonstrates a step, slow and exaggerated. “See? Easy.”

You copy him, mimicking his footwork.

He nods approvingly. “Not bad. Now a little faster.”

You repeat the move.

You step forward—directly onto his foot.

Hard.

“OW—” Yeonjun yelps, hopping on one leg. “You actually just—Ow, ow, ow—”

The other members, who had been stretching nearby, burst into laughter.

Beomgyu collapses onto the floor, wheezing. “Bro, she really took you out!”

Yeonjun glares at you, still clutching his foot. “That was personal. I felt it.”

You cross your arms. “I warned you.”

He exhales dramatically, shaking his head. “Okay. Maybe bodyguard work is more your thing.”

You smirk. “Told you.”

His constant texts of nonsense hadn’t stopped, they just got… more creative.

Yeonjun: If I get a paper cut, is that an emergency? You: No. Yeonjun: What if it’s a really bad one? You: Still no. Yeonjun: What if I have an emotional paper cut? You: Blocked. Yeonjun: 😭😭😭

You sigh, dropping your phone onto the table.

This is getting out of control.

Because it doesn’t feel like just a game anymore.

After a long event, you and Yeonjun sit in the company car, exhausted.

The city lights blur past the windows, the hum of the engine filling the silence.

Yeonjun exhales, tilting his head back.

“It’s weird, isn’t it?” he murmurs.

You glance at him. “What is?”

“How you’re always here.”

Your fingers twitch slightly against your lap.

“It’s my job,” you say, more to yourself than to him.

“Yeah, but…” He turns his head, eyes settling on you. “It doesn’t feel like just that anymore.”

Your stomach twists. You don’t answer. And Yeonjun doesn’t push but the words linger between you, unspoken.

It happens during a late-night shoot.

The production team has been working for hours, filming Yeonjun’s new solo music video. He was filming a scene where he pours a bottle of water on himself, then proceeds to dance.

But the thing about water? It makes everything slippery.

You’re standing off to the side, scanning the area as Yeonjun films a take. He moves through the scene flawlessly, his body swaying to the beat, charisma practically dripping off him.

Then—

His foot slides.

It happens too fast. One second, he’s perfectly in sync with the music. The next, his balance wavers.

You react instinctively.

Before he can hit the slick ground, you step forward, grabbing his arm and pulling him upright.

Unfortunately, Yeonjun overcorrects.

Momentum carries him forward.

Directly into you.

The world slows as his body crashes into yours, and suddenly, you’re chest-to-chest.

You brace against the impact, hands gripping his shoulders to steady him. His arms instinctively wrap around your waist to keep himself from fully toppling over.

The set falls eerily silent.

It takes a second to register—how close your faces are, how your breaths mingle in the chilly night air, how you can feel the warmth of his hands even through your jacket.

Yeonjun blinks, looking dazed.

Then his gaze flickers down.

Your heart jumps.

There’s something different in his expression—less teasing, more intense.

The weight of it makes your throat go dry.

For a moment, neither of you move.

Neither of you speak.

“Uh…”

A voice breaks the tension.

Beomgyu.

You both snap out of it at the same time, stepping apart so fast it’s almost comical.

Beomgyu, who was standing a few feet away, only having arrived to support Yeonjun, raises an eyebrow. “So… should we leave you two alone, or—?”

“Shut up,” Yeonjun mutters, running a hand through his hair as if that will somehow erase what just happened.

You clear your throat. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” Yeonjun says, still looking a little dazed. Then he exhales a soft laugh. “Guess you really are my bodyguard.”

The teasing is forced. You can tell.

And the way he keeps sneaking glances at you for the rest of the night?

Yeah. You definitely didn’t imagine it.

The tension doesn’t fade.

Even after the shoot wraps, even after the crew starts packing up, even after Beomgyu finally stops wiggling his eyebrows at you from across the set.

You can still feel it.

It lingers in the way Yeonjun keeps glancing at you. The way his jaw tightens every time someone disrupts the silence stretching between you. The way his hands clench like he wants to say something but can’t.

You pretend not to notice.

But of course, Yeonjun doesn’t let things slide that easily.

“Y/N.”

You barely have time to react before he grabs your wrist, tugging you toward a secluded area behind the set. It’s quiet here, away from the lingering staff members and nosy bandmates.

You sigh, already knowing where this is going.

“Yeonjun—”

“What was that?” His voice is quiet but firm. “Back there.”

You fold your arms. “You slipped. I caught you. That’s it.”

He lets out a short laugh, but there’s no humor in it. “Yeah? Is that what we’re calling it?”

You don’t respond.

Yeonjun steps closer. Not too much, but enough that the air between you suddenly feels thinner. “Don’t act like you didn’t feel it.” His voice is lower now, more serious. “Because I know I did.”

Your breath catches.

Yeonjun isn’t teasing anymore. There’s no playful smirk, no mischievous glint in his eyes.

Just quiet intensity.

“I don’t know what this is,” he admits, running a hand through his damp hair. “But I know that it’s… something.”

You swallow hard.

“You don’t want to talk about it? Fine,” he continues. “But don’t pretend it’s not there.”

It’s dangerous—the way his words make your resolve crack, the way your heart betrays you by speeding up.

You know what he’s asking.

You know where this road leads.

And you can’t—

You step back.

“This isn’t a drama, Yeonjun,” you say quietly. “You have your career. I have a job to do.”

Yeonjun’s expression flickers—something unreadable, something almost hurt—but he masks it quickly.

For a long moment, he just looks at you.

Then he exhales, a bitter smile ghosting his lips. “Right.”

The word is simple.

But it stings.

You don’t wait for him to say anything else.

You turn and walk away, willing yourself not to look back.

Later that night, you lie in your bed, recalling the events that happened earlier. Yeonjun’s words haunt your mind.

Buzz!

The sudden vibration brought you back to reality from your thoughts. You grab your phone and check it.

Yeonjun: Still awake? You: Go to sleep. Yeonjun: I meant what I said. I’m not letting this go.

You stare at your screen.

And for the first time, you’re not sure if you want him to.

Yeonjun sighs when he sees no response from you. He barely sleeps that night. Your words echo in his head, looping like a broken record.

"This isn’t a drama, Yeonjun. You have your career. I have a job to do."

But you didn’t deny it. You didn’t say he was wrong, and that’s enough to push him forward.

So the next morning, he does something reckless.

He walks straight into HYBE’s office and demands a meeting.

The higher-ups look at him with wary expressions, already sensing trouble.

“If this is about your bodyguard—” one of them starts, but Yeonjun cuts them off.

“I need to talk to you about Y/N.”

A long silence.

One of the executives sighs, leaning back in his chair. “Yeonjun—”

“I know what you’re going to say,” Yeonjun interrupts, crossing his arms. “That it’s unprofessional. That it’s bad for my image. That fans see bodyguards as untouchable. That if this gets out, it could ruin things for both of us.”

He meets each of their gazes head-on.

“I don’t care.”

Another silence.

Someone clears their throat. “Yeonjun—”

“I don’t care if people get mad,” he continues firmly. “I don’t care if it costs me fans. I don’t care about any of that.”

The words leave his mouth before he can stop them.

“She’s not just my bodyguard.”

That gets their attention.

One of the higher-ups raises an eyebrow. “Then what is she?”

Yeonjun doesn’t hesitate.

“She’s someone I’m not willing to lose.”

A heavier silence fills the room.

The company doesn’t outright reject him.

But they don’t agree, either. “Yeonjun,” one of them says carefully, “you’re asking us to take a risk.”

He doesn’t waver. “Then take it.”

The executives exchange looks. “We’ll… consider it.”

That’s all he gets, but it’s enough. For now.

You start pulling away.

It’s subtle at first. Small, barely noticeable shifts in behavior.

You stop responding to his late-night texts. You keep conversations brief, strictly professional. You take extra steps to create distance, ensuring nothing about your relationship can be misinterpreted.

Yeonjun notices.

And he hates it.

But he doesn’t get the chance to fix it before everything goes wrong.

It’s late after a music show recording.

Yeonjun is heading out through a private parking lot exit, an area usually low-risk. Most of the security has already left with the other members, and only a few staff linger, packing up equipment.

You do your usual scan.

Everything looks fine.

Then—

Something feels off.

You can’t pinpoint why at first.

A figure near the exit, wearing a staff badge, carrying a clipboard. They look normal—like any other employee wrapping up for the night.

But then they shift, adjusting their sleeve.

That’s when you see it.

A flash of silver.

Knife.

Your body reacts before your mind fully registers it.

They lunge.

Straight for Yeonjun.

You shove him back—hard—causing him to stumble against the car.

The knife swings forward, slashing through the air—missing him but slicing into your arm instead.

Pain sears through you, hot and sharp.

But you don’t flinch.

The attacker lunges again, wild with desperation.

This time, you catch their wrist mid-swing, twisting sharply.

A strangled cry—then the distinct sound of metal clattering to the pavement.

Before they can react, you drive them back with brutal efficiency, slamming them against the car and pinning them down.

Security floods in seconds later, tackling the sasaeng to the ground.

But Yeonjun doesn’t see any of that.

His eyes are locked on you.

More specifically—

The blood dripping from your sleeve.

He’s in front of you in an instant, grabbing your arm.

His hands are shaking.

“Are you hurt?” His voice is rough, like he’s forcing the words out.

You glance at the wound. The cut is deep but not life-threatening.

“It’s nothing.”

Yeonjun’s grip tightens.

“You—” His voice cracks. “You didn’t even hesitate.”

Something about that fact seems to break him.

Because this is the moment he knows.

Knows that you care more about protecting him than yourself.

Knows that he can’t lose you.

Knows that this isn’t just one-sided anymore.

The world finds out.

You wake up to your phone buzzing non-stop. Texts, calls, notifications flooding in so fast you can’t keep up.

At first, you think it’s just company business.

Then you see the headlines.

“Yeonjun’s Bodyguard Takes Down Armed Attacker.”“Who Is the Woman Protecting Choi Yeonjun?”“Should an Idol’s Safety Rely on Someone Getting Hurt?”

Your stomach drops.

Someone must have leaked the security footage.

The video is everywhere—shared across social media, dissected by news sites, blowing up on forums. It’s grainy but clear enough to show exactly what happened.

The moment you shoved Yeonjun out of harm’s way. The flash of the knife. The way you barely hesitated before putting yourself between him and the attacker.

And most importantly—

Yeonjun’s expression when he saw you bleeding.

A mix of horror, panic, and something deeper.

Something that the entire world is analyzing now.

You scroll through the trending topics.

#YeonjunBodyguard#TXTProtectionFail#WhoIsShe#HYBEStatementWhen

Fans are in full meltdown mode.

Some are in awe.

“She took a KNIFE for him???”“That was straight out of an action movie. Who is this woman??”“I’ve never been more invested in a staff member before.”

Some are furious.

“How could security be this sloppy??”“Idols should not be relying on their bodyguards to get HURT.”“HYBE needs to do better.”

And, of course—

Some have already begun shipping you.

“Tell me I’m not the only one seeing the tension between them.”“The way Yeonjun looked at her?? I felt that.”“They have main couple in a k-drama energy. I’m sorry.”

You exhale sharply, locking your phone.

This is exactly what you didn’t want.

Your job isn’t to be in the spotlight. You were supposed to blend in, stay in the background, do your work without anyone noticing.

This?

This is a disaster.

You need air.

You slip away to the company rooftop, hoping for a moment of silence, away from the chaos.

The city sprawls out below, glittering under the night sky. It should be calming.

But all you can think about is the fallout.

The company will have to address this. They’ll want to “manage the narrative,” keep things from spiraling out of control.

They’ll probably pull you from Yeonjun’s security detail. Maybe even reassign you completely.

You should be relieved.

This is what you wanted, right?

Then why does it feel like a knot is tightening in your chest?

You don’t hear Yeonjun approach, but you feel his presence before he speaks.

“You saved me.”

His voice is soft, but there’s something raw underneath it.

You don’t turn. “It’s my job.”

“No.”

This time, it’s firmer.

You feel him step closer.

“That wasn’t just your job.”

Silence.

A heavy, suffocating silence.

Then—

“That’s the problem,” you admit quietly, voice barely above a whisper. “I didn’t hesitate.”

The words linger in the air, heavier than you intended.

Because you know what they mean.

You weren’t just protecting an artist.

You were protecting him.

Not out of duty, not out of obligation—

But because you couldn’t not protect him.

You hear Yeonjun inhale sharply, like he’s about to say something.

You finally turn to face him.

His expression is unreadable, but his eyes—his eyes say everything.

There’s frustration. Worry. Relief.

And something else.

Something you’re terrified to acknowledge.

Yeonjun takes another step forward, closing the space between you.

“I don’t want to pretend this is nothing anymore.” His voice is quiet, but there’s a determination behind it that makes your stomach twist.

“Yeonjun…” You shake your head. “Your career…”

His jaw clenches.

“You think I care about that?”

You open your mouth, but he doesn’t let you speak.

“Do you know what went through my head when I saw you bleeding?” His voice is rough, like the words are being dragged out of him. “I didn’t care about the cameras. The fans. The company. I didn’t give a shit about any of it.”

He exhales sharply. “All I could think was, what if it was worse?”

“Then it would’ve been worse.”

“But what if I lost you?”

You stay silent. Something tightens in your chest.

“I know this isn’t just me.” Yeonjun’s voice softens slightly. “And I know you’re scared.”

His gaze flickers over your face, as if trying to read your thoughts.

“Tell me I’m wrong,” he says, almost pleading.

You can’t.

You should.

But you can’t, because he’s right. You don’t answer and Yeonjun smiles. It’s soft. Triumphant.

Like he finally has the confirmation he’s been waiting for. His voice drops to a whisper. “Good.”

Because now? He’s not letting you go.

Yeonjun doesn’t wait.

The next morning, he storms into HYBE’s main office, eyes burning with determination. He doesn’t ask for a meeting. He demands one.

The executives barely have time to process before he’s seated at the head of the long conference table, arms crossed, expression unreadable.

“If you want me to keep working, I need her here,” he says bluntly.

Silence.

The board members glance at one another, their expressions tense.

One of them sighs. “Yeonjun, we understand you’re in a difficult position, but—”

“My position isn’t difficult,” he interrupts. “It’s simple.”

His voice is calm, but there’s a weight behind it. A finality.

“You’re asking us to take a risk,” another executive says cautiously.

Yeonjun doesn’t blink. “Then take it.”

They hesitate.

“If dating rumors spread, it could damage your career.”

“Your image will take a hit.”

“Fans see bodyguards as untouchable. If this gets out, it could ruin things for both of you.”

Yeonjun exhales sharply, shaking his head. “Then we don’t let it get out.”

Another silence.

“Or,” he says, leaning forward, “we handle it together.”

For the first time, the executives actually seem to consider it.

And Yeonjun knows he’s winning.

The call comes in less than an hour later.

When you step into the private meeting room, you already know what’s coming.

The HR rep sitting across from you folds their hands neatly, expression unreadable.

“We’ve discussed the situation,” they say. “And there are two options.”

You nod, waiting.

“Option one: You transfer out of Yeonjun’s security detail. You remain with HYBE but will no longer have any contact with him.”

A clean break.

A professional solution.

A suffocating, miserable choice.

You swallow. “And option two?”

The HR rep exhales.

“You resign completely.”

Your stomach clenches.

Of course.

Keep your job but lose Yeonjun. Or leave everything.

They think they’ve backed you into a corner.

And maybe they have.

But before you can answer—

Before you can decide—

Yeonjun makes the decision for you.

You sit stiffly in the HR meeting room, hands folded in your lap, trying to keep your expression neutral.

The air is tense.

Across from you, two HR representatives sit with carefully blank expressions, as if they aren’t about to completely change your life.

“We understand that Yeonjun is insisting on keeping you around,” one of them says, adjusting their glasses. “But let’s be clear—this is an unprecedented situation.”

You nod once, waiting.

“It’s crucial that you maintain strict professionalism.”

“Understood.”

“Any slip-ups, any public incidents, any unprofessional behavior—” The HR rep folds their hands together. “And we’ll have to revisit this arrangement.”

Translation: One mistake, and you’re out.

You keep your face blank, but your stomach is in knots.

It’s not like you didn’t expect this. You knew there would be consequences, knew the company would want to keep control.

But hearing it laid out so coldly makes your throat feel tight.

“Do you have any questions?”

You open your mouth—to say no, to accept their terms, to pretend none of this is affecting you—

A knock on the door.

The HR reps frown slightly, glancing at each other. “Come in.”

The door cracks open.

And standing there, looking half-apologetic, half-panicked—

Is Soobin.

Your brows furrow. Soobin isn’t the type to interrupt meetings unless it’s serious.

He clears his throat, stepping inside. “Uh, sorry to interrupt, but…” His eyes flick to you. “You might want to see this.”

Your stomach twists.

“What is it?” one of the HR reps asks, unimpressed.

Soobin hesitates, then sighs and just turns his phone screen toward you.

And on it was a Weverse Live.

Yeonjun’s Weverse Live.

You blink.

He’s sitting there in their practice room, casually reading fan comments, TXT members lounging in the background.

And then—

A fan question pops up.

“Oppa, what do you think of your bodyguard? She was so cool!”

Your heart stops.

Because instead of dodging the question—

Instead of laughing it off—

Yeonjun smirks and reads it out loud.

And then, smoothly, “She’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. She's practically 99.9% my type.”

You sit there, frozen.

Completely. Frozen.

Soobin shifts awkwardly. “Yeah, so… uh… that just happened.”

The HR reps look deeply unamused.

You are going to kill him.

The next morning, HYBE holds an emergency meeting.

You already know what’s coming.

But this time, you don’t walk in alone.

Yeonjun is waiting for you outside the boardroom.

When he sees you approaching, he doesn’t say anything at first. Just watches you carefully, as if making sure you’re really here.

Then, he holds out his hand.

You hesitate. Not because you don’t want to take it, but because you know what it means. But then you remember—

“You’re not alone in it anymore.”

So, in front of the entire executive board, you take it.

The tension in the room is palpable when you step inside.

The executives take one look at your intertwined hands and exchange wary glances.

Someone clears their throat. “Yeonjun—”

But he cuts them off immediately. “I’ll save you the trouble of trying to decide for me.” His voice is calm. Unshakable. “I’ve thought about everything. The risks, the consequences, the backlash.”

His grip on your hand tightens slightly. “And I still choose her.”

Silence.

One of the higher-ups sighs, rubbing their temples.

“You understand what this could mean for your image, right?”

Yeonjun shrugs. “Then my image changes.”

The executives look at each other again, clearly unhappy.

“You’re really willing to risk it?” one of them asks.

Yeonjun tilts his head.

“I don’t see it as a risk.”

A longer pause.

After a heavy discussion, the company settles on a compromise.

They won’t announce the relationship, but they won’t force you apart either.

“Be discreet,” an executive warns.

Yeonjun grins. “Sure.”

The meeting ends.

And the second you step out of the boardroom, Yeonjun pulls you aside.

“Are you okay?” he murmurs, voice softer now.

You let out a slow breath. “I think so.”

You’re exhausted. Emotionally drained, but also relieved.

Because after everything, you’re still here.

With him.

Yeonjun watches you carefully, eyes scanning your face for any hesitation. Any doubt.

And when he finds none, he moves.

Slowly, deliberately.

He lifts a hand, cupping your cheek.

Your heart stutters.

“Tell me to stop,” he whispers.

You don’t and that’s all he needs.

Yeonjun leans in and kisses you.

It’s soft at first, like he’s giving you a chance to change your mind.

But when you don’t pull away, when your hands grip his hoodie and pull him closer—

The hesitation vanishes.

Yeonjun tilts his head, deepening the kiss, his other arm wrapping firmly around your waist.

You feel the tension in his body—weeks, months of restraint finally breaking.

It’s intoxicating.

And for the first time since all of this started—

You let yourself want this.

Want him.

When you finally pull apart, Yeonjun rests his forehead against yours, grinning.

“You know,” he murmurs, “I think that was worth the risk.”

You huff out a laugh, breathless. “Shut up.”

Yeonjun just smirks and kisses you again.

Months later, things settle down.

There’s still speculation—fans aren’t stupid. Some of them have noticed the way Yeonjun smiles at his phone more often, the way he disappears at odd hours, the way he subtly glances at security whenever you’re near.

But there’s no official confirmation, and that’s exactly how HYBE wants it. Still, you and Yeonjun fall into an easy rhythm. Sneaky dates, teasing banter, late-night texts.

Yeonjun: So are we, like, officially dating? You: What do you think? Yeonjun: I think I love you. You: …Block. Yeonjun: Not a no… Y/N: HUH?? Y/N: NO Y/N: JUN NO Y/N: N O Y/N: I DIDN’T SAY YES Y/N: HELLO???

You see no response.

Your heart drops.

"He wouldn't actually—" No, he would. He absolutely would.

You don’t hesitate to sprint straight to the elevator, mashing the button to his floor.

You barge into the dorm without knocking.

“CHOI YEONJUN, YOUR ASS BETTER NOT BE—”

You freeze, slapping a hand over your mouth because there he is.

Sitting casually in his dorm.

On Weverse Live.

LIVE.

RIGHT NOW.

Yeonjun turns toward the camera, eyes twinkling with mischief.

“Oh, perfect timing,” he says smoothly, as if he didn’t just commit career suicide.“My baby’s here.”

The chat… explodes.

“BABY?????” “who???” “HELLO EXCUSE ME?” “Who’s voice was that??” “WHO’S HE TALKING TO.”

You’re frozen in horror. Your mind is racing at a thousand miles per hour, probably even faster than the chat in his live.

Yeonjun, meanwhile, is as relaxed as ever. He waves you over. “C’mon, don’t be shy now. You were loud just a second ago.”

You stare at him like he’s lost his mind.

Because he has. This man is actually insane.

You lunge forward and smack his arm.

Yeonjun laughs. Actually laughs. “Kidding! Kidding! Relax, baby.”

He turns back to the camera, completely unbothered.

“She’s shy, guys. Let’s not scare her off.”

You cannot believe what is happening. You grab his phone and end the live immediately. Then you whirl it at him.

"WHAT. IS. WRONG. WITH. YOU."

Yeonjun just grins. “So, is this how you wanna soft-launch? Or should I post a couple pic?”

You throw a pillow at his face.

He dodges, laughing.

And despite everything—despite the chaos and absolute madness of the situation— You find yourself smiling.

Yeonjun catches it immediately. His expression softens, amusement melting into something sincere. He steps forward, reaching for your hand, lacing his fingers through yours.

“You’re stuck with me, you know?” he murmurs.

His thumb brushes over your knuckles, gaze gentle.

Your chest tightens. You exhale, shaking your head.

“Yeah, yeah. You’re lucky I like you.”

Yeonjun winks.

“I know.”

Rei's Notes ✎: Just a smaller fic than usual since I've been busy with school so pls enjoy still teehee~ Not my best but I just wanted to put something out after being inactive. Thank you to my bb nina @apeachty for beta-reading this <3 Will definitely be writing something else longer soon~

⟢ Taglist: @yunverie @dawngyu @hueningstar @hhoneyhan @immelissaaa @lovingbeomgyudayone @xylatox @i-like-to-read-at-4am @imlonelydontsendhelp @ode2soob @pagelets @isjsnsjsn

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puppykatz · 6 months ago

Note

pls write some fluff w dani and gn!reader

12:00AM ‹𝟹

ᯓᡣ𐭩 ; daniela avanzini x gn reader.

summary ‎::: you and dani have been in the talking stage for a couple weeks now, but new years might be the final push you two need.

warnings ‎::: reader gets a little overstimulated, but that's it !!

note... a week late for new years bc im a slow writer.. and the intro reads a tad rushed bc i had a rough time figuring out how to make the transition smooth :[ im very sorry!! (also i am in fact working on some other requests rn! ty guys sm for your patience ^.^)

dani smiled, greeting everyone excitedly whilst they cheered over her arrival. you stood behind her nervously, yours hands intertwined, giving a meek smile along with small waves to the few people who noticed and welcomed you in.

you were dani's plus one to a new years gathering, and to say you were anxious was an understatement; this was the first time you were meeting any of her friends in person. you'd talked to a few of them interchangeably a couple times, when they'd burst into her room while the two of you were calling or texting. you'd talked the most to manon, seeing as she's dani's roomate, and often entertained you whenever dani stepped away for a little during one of your calls.

it wasn't long before two of you were pulled away into watching an on-going uno match, as it was the crowd's current main focus.

eventually, that game ended, and a second one started—but unfortunately, you had been eliminated pretty early on, and since everyone else was busy continuing on with the game, you'd figured it'd be okay to step out onto the balcony for a few as it had gotten a little rowdy due to all the +2s.

what you didn't realize, was that dani had gotten eliminated as well, and noticed you leaving. she frowned, wondering if something happened that upset you. to not draw any attention to you or her, she stood up quietly, following you out onto the balcony.

“yn?” she called out, softly shutting the balcony door behind her. you greeted her, smiling sheepishly as she stood next to you. “are you alright?”

“yeah. it was just kind of.. loud.”

she inched closer to you, taking your hands in hers. “we can leave if you want.”

you shook your head profusely, “no, i'm okay. really.” you gave her hands a light squeeze as affirmation, your heart warming up at the fact that she seemed so genuinely concerned.

she opened her mouth to say something else, immediately being cut off by ruckus from within the house; everyone had paused the game and begun counting down. “it's 12:00 already?” she muttered, unconsciously fiddling with your hands.

as soon as the countdown got to one, your eyes were fixated on the sky, cheerfully watching all the different fireworks go off. dani, on the other hand, had her gaze fixated on you; admiring how pretty you looked with all the firework colors lighting up your face.

“can i kiss you?” her voice was barely over a whisper, as if it was a thought that wasn't meant to be said aloud.

you whipped your head to look at her, immediately being met with her gaze; the sweetest, love-filled doe eyes you'd ever seen staring back at you. she was a lot closer than you remembered, yet you were unsure if you had even heard her correctly.

“please?” hearing her plea made your stomach flip, and you couldn't help but nod giddily.

you couldn't even get a second nod in before her lips were on yours, her hand traveling up to caress your cheek while the other tugged you closer by the hem of your shirt. the kiss was slow, her lips moving against yours passionately, though delicately, as if she were afraid to hurt you or possibly scare you away.

she let go of your shirt, bringing her other hand up to hold your face fully. your knees wobbled, feeling her smile into the kiss. “already falling for me?”

you barely had the chance to respond before a knock on the balcony door startled you two apart.

“we're.. starting uno round three.. or are you guys too busy?” manon smiled innocently at the two of you, clearly planning all the different ways she'd tease dani about this later.

dani bashfully muttered a response, entwining your hands again and following manon back inside, bringing you along with her.

── 𖹭 ──

for the rest of the night, dani hovered around you; her hand never left yours and the smile on her face never faded once. the kiss had seemingly boosted her confidence, as she'd started openly using pet names for you. she'd also gotten a lot more touchy; currently, she had her arms wrapped around your waist, her chin resting on your shoulder while she hugged you from behind.

“babe, play that one.” dani perked up, using her head to point to a card in your hand.

“hold on. how is it fair that these two are teaming??” megan called out, pointing at you and dani, since you guys had decided to mix your cards and just play as one.

“leave them alone megan, you know dani will explode if she's away from yn for five minutes.” sophia remarked, nudging dani with her shoulder playfully.

dani's cheeks heated up and she hid her face in the crook of your neck, hugging you a little tighter.

you finally placed down a card, “okay, okay. lara, your turn.” unable to hold back your smile, you turned to dani, pressing a kiss to the side of her head before turning your attention back to the game.

#i LOVE spreading the clingy dani agenda #₊˚⊹☆ – 851 words #₊˚⊹☆ – divider creds; cafekitsune #daniela avanzini x reader #daniela x reader #dani x reader #daniela avanzini #katseye #katseye x reader #gn reader #gender neutral reader #x reader #kpop #katseye imagines #kpop x reader #kpop imagines #₊˚⊹☾ – works #₊˚⊹☾ – requests

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im-not-a-ghost · 8 months ago

Text

Pick a kpop song and I'll tell you who is having naughty thoughts of you [18+]

Minors do not interact. This is part 1 of a series of 3 posts. We will try to get a bunch of details that will help us identify this person. This will be a lengthy reading, so I may have to publish several posts. If that's the case, I will write down the link to the other parts so that you don't get lost.

Slow it down make it bouncy ~

Threads of fate oracle cards | The Void, Underworld, Patience, Fate

This person may be someone you share a very special connection with. One that is very intimate, and that doesn't mean that you necessarily had physical contact with this person. You are very close with this person, closer than you've ever been with anyone else because you know things about each other that no body knows. That's the intimacy I'm talking about. Another thing I am picking up on is linked to the egg represented on the fate card. It reminded me of the drama series "Alchemy of Souls". In the series, Naksu/Mudeok and Jang Uk share a "private joke" about birds and their eggs. Jang Uk compares Mudeok to a fragile egg that was left alone at the top of a tree and that needs to be taken care of and protected at all costs to be able to survive and see the light of day. Thus, he compares himself to a surrogate bird mom charged of watching over that egg until it can soar high in the sky. This comparison may be significant to you and this person. The dynamic of the two characters overall may be similar to the one you share with this person. Jang Uk and Naksu/Mudeok both need each other desperately at first and their relationship is mainly one based on a mutual accord to take advantage of the other's position and skills, as they're aware they have no other option but to cooperate to reach their personal goals. But the more the plot progresses, the closer they get and the more special their bond becomes. With the combination of Void, Underworld and Patience, I really get that vibe of two people that were forced by external circumstances to meet each other and learn to cooperate because they have a common destiny. In doing so, they have to learn patience and to face their shadows while keeping their relationship hidden. This feeling of secrecy comes off very strongly. If you know this person, you may not be in contact with them at the moment and whatever happened between the two of you is a secret that both of you share. I also got the message that either one of you could be a psychic. The purpose of that person then may be to awaken the other's psychic potential. We will get further details with two different decks to see if these intuitions are further confirmed. In terms of zodiac signs, I was mainly picking up on Scorpio but there may be other signs that come up later on in the reading.

White Numen Tarot cards | page of swords, 7 of cups, 2 of cups, page of pentacles, knight of wands, Black Numen, back of the deck Moon

In terms of zodiac signs, we have the following being represented : Scorpio, Cancer, Leo, Pisces, Gemini, Virgo. I am getting a clearer picture of who this person could be and what is going on between you. I am shown that they are close to you in age and in energy. Their path and maturity when it comes to their spirituality is similar to yours. This is a person that tends to mirror you. You could have met this person at a time in your life where you were feeling a bit lost or unsure about your future. This was a turning point in your life and it was also the case for this person. I get a perfect place perfect timing vibe from this spread. You or they may be a student. You learn a lot from each other. Though you are very similar, your differences allow you to grow drastically and question your beliefs. This is a person that you may feel very attracted to on a physical level. This person may have several centers of interest that keep them busy. You may be contacting them a lot using social media. You could have met them through travelling or they could come from a different culture. With the energy of the Moon I get the message that this person may have brought a lot of old stuff to the surface when you met them. Fears you thought you had overcome. Worries about the past and future. They could also be someone you dream about a lot and/or a person you met at night. This person definitely is linked to you through the force of karma. Your souls knew of each other before. As for the type of bond you share, I feel like putting a label on it wouldn't be relevant. What you need to know is that this meeting happened for a reason and that you felt it coming. You knew right away that this person would play an important role in your journey, and they probably felt it too.

Crystals oracle cards | Meteorite, Citrine, Moonstone, back of the deck Tourmalined Quartz

First of all, I feel compelled to mention the colors that were associated with these cards. Soft browns, beige and pastel purples/pinks seem to be relevant. What comes first to mind is how soft this person can be. I will know focus on each card individually as some details on those caught my attention.

Meteorite - Connect to your "star stuff" : this card mentions that meteorite comes in three forms and that people who may need to work with their energy are "children of the stars". The majority of the messages revolved around cosmic and galactic energy. This made me think that this person could spend a lot of time stargazing or looking at the clouds as a way to feel connected with you. And you may be doing the same. The other thing I was picking up on is that maybe your souls come from the same original place. If you believe in concepts such as starseeds, light language and such, this may resonate with you. I also thought of Saint Exupery's The Little Prince.

Citrine - Manifest your masterpiece : this card revolved around dreams and artistic endeavors, of doing everything in your power to manifest your wildest dreams. So you and this person may have a common creative project that you work on, a common goal or dream that you talked about. This may be the secret we were mentioning in the beginning. (I also heard "in the beninging" from that meme lmao so maybe you share a lot of private jokes and memes)

Moonstone - Find your natural rythm : this card mentioned travelling as well as star gazing. So your person may travel a lot in their daily life. It's a stone ment to increase empathy and intuition among other things. So it wouldn't be surprising if this person was a healer in blooming, a natural empath. I also got the message that they were incredibly sensual. Taurus energy came in strongly here.

Tourmalined Quartz - Restore your perfect light : with this card I was told that your person is often surrounded by a lot of people whom may not have the best intentions towards them. A lot of people look up to them but also envy them and wish for them to fail. Your person may be struggling with impostor syndrome as well as social anxiety.

All these cards combined lead me to believe that the person we are talking about is someone that is quite popular and radiates a lot of light and love around them. They have a pure heart and soul, are very loving and generous but may face a lot of backlash and challenges, because their light tends to trigger people's shadows. This may be something that questioned them and made them think they were a bad person, or that maybe they deserved to be treated badly. This may be something that you have struggled with as well. Which would explain why your paths crossed.

In another reading, we may be enquiring about the content of this person's thoughts and maybe why you met them. I hope that this reading was insightful and helped you figure out who this person was. I would be more than happy to get your feedback in the comments. Stay tuned to get the tea about this person ~

Mr. Rover, I'm coming over ~

Threads of fate cards | back of the deck The Void, Death, The Alchemist, The Explorer

This is really interesting. Your energy may be tied to group 1 as well. If you hesitated between the two groups, you may want to check out group 1's reading. With the Void card, I am told that you are not in contact with this person. They likely live at a distance from you. Sometimes, you may feel like you and this person are worlds apart and that there is no way you could understand each other. Yet, you do. You are polar opposites. And everything may look like you wouldn't match. However, this person gets you like no other. With this spread I am picking up on fixed sign energy mainly, especially Scorpio and Aquarius, as well as Pisces. The Alchemist card makes me think that this person could be a tarot reader or at least they are interested in forms of divination. Butterflies and stars seem to be relevant to this connection. The Explorer card denotes an energy of being restless, feeling like you don't belong where you are and wanting to broaden your horizons. Both you and this person may have connected over the feeling of being different from the rest of your community, of feeling like where you are isn't what's meant for you and more is waiting elsewhere. Of feeling like your body is too small for you. Like you are not truly comfortable in your skin and wish you were something or someone else. You both may have struggled with anxiety and severe depression. You both may have gone through a dark night of the soul. You both are good manifesters and have big ambitions. You both tend to uproot belief systems and push yourselves beyond your limits because you have a deep desire and need for expansion. You could have met this person while travelling, this travel could have been an unconscious one. Meaning, you could have met this person in the 5D before you met them in person. For some of you, you don't know this person yet. But you feel them energetically. Especially, if you practice meditation or lucid dreaming. We will get further information with two more decks. Hopefully, this could confirm what we've been talking about for now. I also get the message that both of you could have the capacity to communicate with spirits/ghosts. Another thing that could have brought you together could be the passing of a person. This is very specific, but for some of you I get the message that the spirit of a loved one interfered in your favor to get you to meet this person. They did so with the hope that it would help you cope with their passing.

White Numen Tarot cards | back of the deck High Priestess, Queen of cups, 8 of pentacles, Hierophant, knight of pentacles, 9 of wands, White Numen

Taurus energy is heavily present here, as well as Leo and Scorpio. So fixed sign energy definitely. With the High Priestess, this person is definitely into the occult and likely to have psychic abilities. This is a person that gives off a very mysterious vibe. They are very secretive and closed off, they mind their own business and don't share their secrets with just anyone. They are very protective of their space because they just know how people's envy can sometimes affect the outcome of their manifestations. This person is highly intuitive and sensitive. They are caring and nurturing. A natural healer. They have a lot of feminine energy that they gladly share. They are dedicated, hard working, patient. This is a person that doesn't give up easily. The word "failure" is not a part of their vocabulary. This person is determined to win and learn no matter what. This person is aware that whatever outcome they get, they will always be victorious one way or another. This is a person that is traditional but also very spiritual, they are well educated and incredibly wise. They could be a teacher or a mentor of some sort. They are extremely cautious and may sometimes be slow to act. But you can be sure that whatever this person does, they will reach their goal. They like to create and work with the Universe. They follow their path slowly but surely, one step at a time and make sure that they learn their lesson. This is a person that understands how the Universe works and goes with the flow. They are not afraid to take a turn or face struggles because they know that at the end of the day, they will get what's right for them and meant for them. They have a lot of confidence and inner knowing that allows them to navigate life peacefully. People could say that this person is married to their work because of how dedicated they are. They are loyal to a fault and are not the kind to abandon people out of the blue. They are very respectful of others and always try to include everyone. This person is also naturally beautiful and sensual. They instantly make you feel safe and understood. You may have met this person in a work or educational setting. Again, for this group I am getting a very fated meeting. Your energies were aligning way before you met. And this person may have consciously manifested you into their life.

Crystal oracle cards | back of the deck Epidote, Libyan Gold Tektite, Malachite, Kunzite

Right off the bat I get a very charming, exotic vibe from this person. Most of these stones are mined in hot countries, especially African ones. The colors also felt very sensual. They kinda reminded me of Egypt and Cleopatra specifically. This person could be a history nerd. They could be of African descent. I will focus on each card individually to point out certain details that caught my attention.

Epidote - Upgrade your version of you : this stone is mentioned as the "get what you give" stone. Which highlights this person's spiritual nature and generosity. This is a person that works on themselves a lot, that constantly tries to be better and do better. They have a bit of a workaholic attitude.

Libyan gold tektite - Banish your "blahs" : this stone forms in the Sahara desert. So this person could have North African to Central African origins, especially Morocco, Algeria, Tunisia, Libya, Egypt. This peron is goal oriented and pretty stubborn. When they have something in mind, it's hard to get them to change their point of view. Sometimes this person can exhaust themselves pretty quickly because of how hard they work. They tend to work extremely hard at a high frequency very early on and thus burn their energy very quickly.

Kunzite - Open up your love channel : they have trust issues because of past relationships. They tend to be hard on themselves and blame themselves for past failures when in reality they were not responsible for what happened. They tend to put others' needs first and forget their own. This person is very loving and can sacrifice themselves in the name of love.

Malachite - Claim your success : this person is humble. They may tend to bring themselves down or attribute their success to others because they may feel like they don't deserve recognition. They have a very altruistic nature. They are very creative but have a hard time following through with their ideas. They tend to be all over the place sometimes, especially if they've been giving a lot of their time and energy to others.

With the combined energy of all these cards, I picture a woman with a motherly nature, that tends to be the mom of the group. Someone very discreet and quiet that always encourages others and shows affection through acts of service. Someone that can do benevolant work just for the sake of giving. A person that is very sensitive to people's struggles. The kind of person that would cry seeing an animal being hurt and out in the streets. The kind of person that would give out their clothes and money to a person in need. A person that was raised in a religious household and taught to never look down on people and never forget where they came from. Someone from a modest family that rose up to success through their hard work and strong inner belief. A person that has a strong moral compass and lives according to their principles, regardless of what people may think of them. Someone that, because of this mentality, tends to be alone and has a hard time connecting with other people.

I'm the charmer ~

Threads of fate oracle cards | back of the deck Paradox, Love, Self Love, Play

The person we are talking about is someone that may confuse you a lot. With this Paradox card, I get a Star vibe from it, which reminds me of Aquarius. So this person could have Aquarius as one of their main signs. This also tells me that you could have met this person online or if you met in person, your main mean of communication is the Internet. I also get the vibe of someone being a bit popular and very busy with their work and hobbies. This person could be very active on social media and thus investing in many projects with different people. The spread also gives me a feeling of two friends walking on the line of romance. The lines may be blurred with this person. At some moment you may feel like they only perceive you as a friend but other times things they say or do may make you question their feelings for you. And this could actually be because this person is feeling the same toward you. I feel like both of you aren't sure of what the other means to you and what you want out of this connection. This could be a FWB situation or just a mutual crush that both of you kind of ignore for some reason. Peacocks and dolphins may be significant signs. Overall, I get the vibe that you and this person get along very well and have a lot of fun with each other. No matter the distance or the time spent apart, whenever you see this person again or interact again, it always feels like you never really were separated. It's like the last time you spoke was yesterday, even if you may have been in a no contact situation for decades. The affection you have for each other is never dying off. I get a very good vibe from this spread and this person. This is someone who's intensions are pure and loving. I kinda get a starcrossed lovers vibe from this group. But more importantly, I feel like the main reason why this person is special to you is beacause they are a part of your soul tribe. This is someone that uplifts you and supports you no matter what, though you may be complete opposites and have different opinions about the world. This person just respects you deeply and appreciates you for who you are. I pick up on a lot of affection and gratitude for each other. It's like both of you only truly feel at peace with one another. Not only does this person give you love but they also gently nudge you into loving yourself more instead of constantly nurturing others. When both of you are interacting, a lot of healing is happening. One thing that may really help you identify this person, I feel, is that this is someone you share a lot of laughter with. You may have a lot of private jokes, secret codes that only you know of, memories of deep conversations that you couldn't have had with anyone else. Honestly this really gives me a best friends to lovers vibe. I also pick up on Pisces energy.

White Numen tarot cards | back of the deck Judgement, Hierophant, Emperor, 2 of pentacles, 5 of pentacles, 5 of swords, 2 of wands

Before I dive in any further, I wish to point out that while I shuffled the deck cards kept falling in big groups and it felt like the energy was all over the place. This gave me the impression that there may be several people that are thinking of you. So if you were drawn to different piles, this may be a confirmation that this is your case. Also I felt like one person specifically was doing their best not to think of you but it's just something that they can't help. If this person ends up thinking of you despite their resistance, then things get out of control and they feel like they can never get their composure back again. In terms of Zodiac signs, we have Scorpio, Taurus, Aries mainly. For some of you I think your exes could be potentially among the people that think of you. Whether those were just friends or actual lovers. I feel like many people who may not have manifested any sign of attraction for you ar now reminiscing about you and wishing that they had given you a chance. Which to me is further confirmed by the spread. With he Judgement card and the combination of the cards, I am given a message that this person or these people could be coming in and out of your life lately and some of them may be trying to find an opportunity to express their attraction. I particularly pick up on the energy of someone you may have had a fallout with because of external circumstances, that is now realizing how much you mean to them and wanting to come back into your life. This person I feel misses the feeling of being with you and more importantly they feel like their chance was stolen from them. Like something happened that prevented them from truly giving your relationship a chance. Like, for example, let's imagine you moved into a city and met a person. Things were going well and this person developped feelings for you. When they were about to reveal their feelings to you, you announced them that you were moving out of the city because of your work. This kind of feeling. For some, it could even be that you got into a relationship with someone else before they could even confess their feelings to you and they were cut short by that. Out of respect for you, they chose to remain silent but now they just can't hold it in anymore. This is someone that envisioned a future with you and wanted to commit to you, but they may have taken a long time to find the courage to make the necessary adjustments in their life to enable this connection to flourish. Another possibility is that your faith or your family were a main obstacle in your connection, which caused you to separate ways.

Crystals oracle cards | back of the deck Smoky Quartz, Sapphire, Labradorite, Herkimer Diamond

First of all, I picked up on very specific details that may not resonate with everyone. One person may be a smoker. One person may have a pet cat or a pet dog. One person may have blue eyes.

Smoky Quartz - Arm your spiritual warrior : this is a stone that speaks about protecting your energies from energy vampires and people that may stand in your way. So maybe the person we're talking about may have been someone that wasn't always good to you.

Sapphire - Find your tranquil place : this stone speaks about freeing yourself from the judgmental opinions of you others may have as well as grudges you may hold. So this person could have helped you with your self confidence over the years but they could also have hurt you in other ways. This may be a person you have mixed feelings about because of your common past.

Labradorite - Protect your magic : Canada may be significant. Pisces is coming up again with this card. This person may have helped you with reconciling with love and romance. They may also have helped you realize your own worth.

Herkimer diamond - Power wash your energy : this is a cleansing crystal. Despite its name, it is not a diamond. This person may thus have been someone that you mistook for something they were not. People may underestimate or overestimate this person. They could be someone that enjoys travelling or you may have met them while travelling. New York may be significant to some of you.

With all that being said, I feel like many energies are being mixed within this group but the overall vibe seems to be that most of the people we're talking about are people from your past that you may not be in contact with anymore on a daily basis. Some of them you may not even suspect of having such thoughts about you. You may be happy that some of them are not in your life anymore but others you may miss and wonder about.

#pick a card #love pac #18+ pac

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